Question:
Questions about t.o.p.s.

I wanted to know, I there is not a support group anywhere near my town for w.l.s. could I consider going to t.o.p.s.? There is a tops support group that meets next door to my house once a month, But the closist support group for wls is over an hour away. As for as I know. I live in Camden T.N.. If anyone knows, please let me know. I would rather go next door than to drive for an hour...Bernice    — Bernice B. (posted on November 8, 2003)

November 8, 2003
I had a horrible experience at a TOPS meeting when I was a teenager. I was new to the group and desperate to lose weight. I tried so hard my first week and when it came time for weigh in I either had lost the least amount or gained, I cant remember exactly which now. But anyway, they basically humiliated me. Gave me this teeny tiny plate to take home and which was the "trophy" for person who did the worst. It was announced to the whole room. I felt horrible. I remember vividly trying to choke back the tears through the whole meeting. I am not sure what the philosphy is now, but if its the same I would say no way!! My surgeons support group meeting is an hour away as well. I missed the first one (LAP RNY 09/25/03). My suggestion is try to make it if at all possible because no one knows more than others who have had WLS about what you are going through. The feedback and pointers that you can get from others in the same boat is so valuable. Not to mention most support groups have speakers or other resources that you can turn to for help. Good luck. Michelle
   — Michelle B.

November 8, 2003
I have been to a few different TOPS groups, and I have NEVER had a negative experience like the former poster. They gave rewards for the best loss, $10 to the monthly best loser, charm bracelet and charms every so many pounds... They have always met weekly, though. Starting in January TOPS will have a WLS awards category. I have been attending off and on since I was a teenager, and I am a member now. I am secretary of our chapter, and I plan on continuing to attend after surgery. I will also attend WLS support group meetings at least once a month. I could go more often because one advantage to living in a city is several support groups... Find a good chapter with compassionate members and go for it.!
   — anapple4theteacher

November 8, 2003
The new TOPS WLS program sounds great. I have never been to tops, I know they have a meeting in my town. But my surgeon and support group are a little over an hour away. Right before my surgery the meetings were three times a month, I loved the drive to myself. NO kids, music cranked loud to whatever I wanted, books on tape etc. Plus I don't really think that anyone can understand what it's like to be a WLS patient unless they've done it themselves. You can talk all ya' want but unless you've been there then it's hard to empathize. <p>My suggestion, go to the support group meeting once a month, take advantage of the alone car time. Then attend TOPS the other weeks. You get the best of both worlds but still have WLS patients to commiserate with.
   — Michawn

November 14, 2003
I had a very negative experience with TOPS, but not all groups are the same. You never know where support will be the best for you. I would try both meetings at least once. Good luck Bernice.
   — carpediem