Question:
Has anyone ever had the opportunity to turn someone down?

After surgery, has anyone ever been able to turn someone down that refused to have much to do with them because pre-op their weight was an issue? I have posted this question four times and it hasn't posted (that I could find). Please note... this is NOT why I am having surgery. I just wonder if anyone has ever had the experience that someone wouldn't have much to do with them while they were MO and then when they lost weight it was their turn to tell that person "NO thanks" and I want to know how it felt. Thank you.    — Marcy G. (posted on April 1, 2003)

April 1, 2003
I haven't turned anyone down that I personally know. But I have turned down plenty of strangers. But I have noticed the attention from those I know changing. I get so much more attention from male friend, and male coworkers now. But I tell who is real and who is fake. Just gotta be careful.
   — Shavonne P.

April 1, 2003
Honestly, I get a tremendous amount of attention from men now. And I do often turn men down. But, it's becasue I can. I would have turned a lot of them down when I was overweight too. If they aren't my type, they just aren't my type. Of course, the difference now is that the opportunity to turn men down is greater because I didn't really have many men into me before. I have to say, though, I just had a fight yesterday with a good male friend of five years. He had been blowing me off the last two weeks and I confronted him as to why? He said he was mad at me, becasue he was dropping very obvious hints to me about how he had feelings for me and I was thoughtlessly dismissing them (and him). Now, I just plain don't have "those" type of feelings for him, but yeah - I said "Well, the shoe doesn't fit so comfortably on the other foot, now, does it?" I needed him to know that I was a little resentful after five years, all of a sudden he is in love with me. It's been an interesting experience, seeing love life from these two vastly different points of view (the fat woman vs. the thin woman). It's still rough though.
   — PaulaM

April 1, 2003
more than I like to admit to... but I'm a lesbian... *grin* I'm getting totally unwanted attention from men on various levels... I've declined more than one invitation.
   — Lisa C.

April 2, 2003
Hi Marcy, I saw that you wrote about your previous questions not being posted before, I believe the AMOS MODs posted something about how they have denied postings about "vengence" SO that is probably why it was posted previously. Your question now seems harmless, I'm not saying yours is revengeful now, just giving a possible reason as to why it wasn't displayed before. I fortunately never really had problems with people before, so haven't had to turn anyone down like you mentioned. But I did finally date a guy who I loved for 4 years in college, we dated for my last semester. I honestly don't know if he would've gone for me then, but I had more confidence post-op to pursue it. Goodluck to you!
   — Lezlie Y.

February 8, 2005
I'm bored at work so am perusing thru questions relating to dating...until I can get some therapy this will have to do. I find this an interesting question...it makes me think of a black comedy TV movie from the 70s where a plain jane gets surgery and becomes beautiful and gets to kill off all the jerks who broke her heart. I would LOVE to get vengence on the couple of baddies who have hurt me but unfortunately the most recent one has only known me thin and the others are in TX...someday though, the comic who left me for a lesbian will see me in my new state and really really regret it and I will just laugh (after spitting) in his face. This is one of my fantasies...pretty icky, huh?
   — rebeccamayhew