Question:
If you have been obese since childhood, how do you cope with looking so different aft

I have no clue what I look like without obesity. This is something that has me very curious. How did you handle turning into such a different looking person?    — NicoleG (posted on July 21, 2002)

July 21, 2002
It really took some getting used to. I went thru a period where I would catch a glimpse of myself in a mirror or window & not recognize myself; I startled myself several times. I was obsessed with the emergence of my bones for a while. I wanted to feel other people's bones & see if they felt like mine. I really looked at the bones & shapes of underwear models in magazines. I discovered a body underneath it all that I never really knew. I didn't know WHAT my body was going to look like. It was truly an interesting & amazing journey of discovery. It was wonderful & it still is sometimes. I am "pretty much" used to how I look, but even now (2+ years post), I still see myself sometimes & it feels like I must be dreaming. I could only dream, before, that I would ever look like this. This whole process has done more, tho, than just put me in touch with my physical self, I have learned so much about ME in this journey. It has, in every sense of the words, been a complete change of life for me. What an amazing adventure!
   — Kathy W.

July 21, 2002
It is truely something that you have to get used to. It has been over 2 years since my WLS and this is the first time since early childhood that I have been at a normal weight. I can't seen to get used to the comments about my appearence. I still don't recognize myself when I catch my reflection in the mirror or window. Whenever I catch someone staring at me in public I automatically think that something is wrong with me. Like I have something on my face or my hair is a mess. My husband tells me that it is because I am beautiful and that is why people stare. WHATEVER!!! I just happen to think that he is partial. It is nice to hear though. It is really amazing how other people see you and how you see yourself though. A couple weeks ago I was at my Grandma's funeral and ran into a cousin I hadn't seen in a lot of years. She told me that I looked great. My little (always has been tiny) then spoke up and said that she had warned her that I wasn't much bigger than she is. Excuse me........she is a size 6-8 and I wear a 12-14! No one ever thinks that though. I am 6' tall and weigh 179. People always guess me at 140. I would be skin and bones at 140.
   — livnliter

July 21, 2002
Hey there, I have been overweight since my toddler years, I've never known what it's like to be a thin person, so I had the same question in mind before I had my surgery...I've since lost 114 lbs and am feeling great. I haven't had a problem with losing my self image, or anything like that because the weight still comes off at a slow enough pace that you gradually see the difference...it's not like boom, overnight you're a whole new person...so as time goes by you really do get used to it, in fact, up until a month ago, I swear I was having trouble seeing any difference at all, my mind was so used to thinking of myself as a big person, it's weird but definately something you can deal with. Good luck!
   — Jennifer M.

July 21, 2002
Thank you so much! Your responses have helped! I really felt alone in this and thought I was a bit nuts! You ladies are just the best!
   — NicoleG

July 21, 2002
I've been overweight all my life except for about a 1 year period at age 17. It's difficult to get used to. I still find myself looking at a pair of size 10 jeans and thinking how HUGE they are!! I've never looked like this in my life, not even when I was 17 and weighed 130 (I'm 145 now). I seem to be smaller then I was then but I still see a very fat person at times when I look in the mirror. It's going to take a long time for me to adjust because that's all I've seen all of my life. Good luck to you.
   — Patty H.

July 23, 2002
Hi Nicole! I have been fat all my life too, and I don't know about you, but I am just going to take one day at a time and enjoy them all! Good luck and God Bless.
   — CatLover1964

July 23, 2002
Pre op this was a MAJOR concern. Then I bumped into another post op and mentioned it to him. He simply said you will look like you should of if you werent MO. Somehow this took the edge off this subject. Now I got to goal in 6 months and the appearance change was dramatic. It was wierd looking a someone else in the mirror. Today is my one year anniversary, and I have adjusted to the new looking me. I found a old photo of us and found it hard to believe we were that heavy. Adjustment just takes time... My wife had surgery too.
   — bob-haller