Question:
I cant stop crying.

OK so I had my surgery about 11 days ago and I have been an emotional wreck. Crying all the time regretting that I did this to myself. For example, it's Saturday night- I would usually be out "partying" with my boyfirend and friends, but alas am home alone so I am not tempted by anything. Not that they arent suportive, but I dont want to screw up and drink alcohol too soon. Since Im not back to work yet it feels like I am just watching life live and pass me by- I didnt feel like this before surgery. I dont have any energy. I am so depressed, I've had to double my lexapro. I dont know what to do.    — jtaormina (posted on April 11, 2009)

April 11, 2009
Hi Julie, I'm so sorry that you feel so bad. I am pre-op and a long way from having my surgery, so I can't tell you "I know how you feel." But I did want to tell you that I think what you are feeling is really normal. I know that doesn't make it better or make your sadness go away, and I don't like sounding trite. But it might help a little for you to know that you are passing through a normal period of depression. You are losing a friend (food), and your whole life has changed (along with your innards!). Maybe it wuld help to talk to a therapist or if you went to a support group? Or if you want to chat, I would be happy to also. Please feel better soon. --Barbara
   — barbara-at-the-beach

April 11, 2009
Julie, I completely agree with Barbara! Your body has gone through probably one of the most drastic things ever and in the past, like the rest of us, you handled your depression by eating. Now that has been taking away. I'm three years out and I DO feel your pain! The good news, This too shall pass...I know that does NOTHING for you today but I have faith you will improve because it sounds normal what you're going through. I also agree with Barbara that you should reach out for some help and guidance from the WLS clinic who is caring for you. Did they tell you that this was a possibility? I would hope that if you called to explain the rough patch you're having they would have some helpful suggestions for you. And also, like me, if you were already suffering from depression BEFORE surgery, yeah...it can get pretty bad after! Hang in there hon, you were strong enough to face the surgery, you're strong enough to face this! Lainey
   — Lainesilva

April 11, 2009
Hi there, i can totally see where your coming from, i am one month out and just now am starting to feel a little better. I also regretted my decision for the first two weeks. But now im feeling better about my decision. I also had to double my anti-depressant, my GP said that i should because the small bowel is bypassed you are not absorbing all of your meds. You definatley shouldnt drink alcohol yet, i have heard that we should not drink until about 8 months out. Are you taking your vitamins? I was so tired that i am not getting iron injections and b12 injections but i am still taking my calcium citrate with Vitamin d and my chewable multivitamin. Are u getting in enough protein and water? Both of these are also very important. Hang in there, it will get better shortly. take care Louise
   — sassy1696

April 12, 2009
I felt that same way just about 2 weeks out....I had a very hard time with my emotions and at 9 months out am still having dealings with it and probably always will...IT WILL PASS....have faith...you will be out partying it up with your friends before you know it...You will screw up and you will learn how to treat your new body, you just have to let yourself be human and make mistakes to learn...You will fall, but getting back up and on program is much easier than before, I promise you this...hugs and good luck with your emotional dealings...oh yeah, get yourself a counsellor, I did and it was the best thing I did for myself..
   — lori042499

April 12, 2009
Julie, picture this: it's a year from now. Saturday night finds you dressed in a stunning black cocktail dress with a necklace that doesn't feel like it's about to choke you. You can wear heels because of all of the weight you lost. You look like a dream and you feel as good as you look. Your boyfriend comes over and he's got flowers for you and the two of you head out to a club to meet friends. There you are, dancing, like you're a feather twirling in the warm breeze. You feel good because you choose not to drink, you feel good because you choose not to eat the fried mess at the table that passes itself as an appetizer. Instead of seeing what you don't get, you see what you have, a healthy, strong woman who is ready to take on the world. Imagine it, because it is coming. Give yourself a hug, put on your favorite cry-it-out movie and snuggle up with yourself. Good luck!
   — Ananta

April 12, 2009
Hang in there Julie, it does get easier! I am 2 years out and I still have my days, but don't regret any part of it.
   — sng31

April 12, 2009
Hi Julie. I am almost 7 weeks post op and I can tell you I felt the same exact way. My crying started before I even left the hospital, and didn't stop for about 2 weeks. But trust me when I tell you it will get better. You WILL heal, and I can promise you it does get easier mentally and emotionally. And when you see the pounds start dropping off you'll know then why you went through this. Just let yourself heal hon, watch some funny movies, and kick back for a few more days. Now it is all just a distant memory to me, and it will be for you soon too. Best Wishes!
   — princess111

April 13, 2009
Hi Julie I felt the same way. I was 3 weeks or so post op and my hubby, bro and sis in law were at the Memorial day run and everyone was drinking. I felt so left out. I did wait a few months before my first sip of alcohol and then in very limited moderation. It will get better, I promise. I am now 11 mos post op down 130 lbs total and I do have some wine even can drink tequilla straight. I chose that because less calories but you have to be careful because it does hit me a lot harder than it used to. I have made the decision to drink wine in moderation because it is easier on my system and also thins the blood. The crying will stop. It lasted about 3-4 weeks for me and then you will feel like a new woman with a whole new outlook on life. Feel free to email if you want to chat. [email protected] Arden
   — bikermama