Question:
I am feeling very disconnected 5 days out of gb surgery.
Is this normal? I guess maybe I am already experiencing some depression? I just feel very disconnected from my wonderful husband. He is not complaining one bit and thinks this probably is normal. I am worried that I won't feel like I did before I had the surgery. We have a wonderful relationship, and of course right now I don't feel affectionate. My body is healing very well though. I have very little pain now and am taking walks. I just think I need to hear from people who went though the gastric bypass surgery and hopefully it will make me feel better. Thanks for all the support! — MyOrchids (posted on June 3, 2009)
June 3, 2009
Heather -- first, congratulations on making it to the other side.
Secondly, don't be so hard on yourself. Your body (and mind) is completely
and utterly focused on healing right now, and adjusting to the changes in
hormone levels and everything else that's going on. This
"disconnect" will fade with time, and the best thing to do is let
it run its course. That said, if it goes on for a very long time (six
months or longer) something else may be going on, and you should see your
family doctor. I have anxiety/panic and dysthemic (depressive) disorder,
so right after surgery was a bit of a roller coaster for me what with the
disappearing fat cells overloading my poor system with estrogen and every
other -gen in the book, but with medication and therapy I did survive my
VBG (vertical banded gastroplasty) quite well, thank you. If you've had
children, remember how you may have felt toward your husband in the initial
days and weeks after the baby was born. I love my husband dearly, and he's
a great guy, but for about three months after giving birth to each of my
sons if he'd tried to touch me I would have killed him. My body and mind
were recovering from, and adjusting to, my new circumstances -- as yours is
right now. Be kind to yourself, and be kind to your husband, and this,
too, shall pass. Blessings and skinny thoughts as you embark on the losing
part of your journey!
— Cheryl Denomy
June 3, 2009
I'm one month out from my gp tomorrow and totally identify w/your concerns,
for what it's worth. I even find it difficult to stay focused long enough
to connect w/people on this board who are going thru or have gone thru the
same journey. My husband has been awesome, but I worry how long his
patience will last and how long it will need to. I am getting stronger
every day....nothing like I was five days out and still on pain meds and
then back to the hospital for another week w/complications....but still
seem to focus every waking minute on my new lifestyle/choices/habits: what
to buy, when to eat, exercise, get enough sleep, organize my meds and
vitamins so that they are spaced out during the day and dont fill up my
pouch before i get enough protien in etc etc etc. I also find every (REM)
sleeping moment to be transformational as my dreams are changing to a more
empowered me! so I know the sleep is important to my mental health as well
as my healing health. At this point I mostly find myself oddly tired at the
strangest least expected times of day and often chilly. don't know how much
of this strikes home to you but thought i'd share because your question has
been on my mind all month.
— greencougar
June 3, 2009
Heather, although I haven't had surgery yet,(6 more days, eeek!), I know
exactly how you feel. I have 4 kids and after every birth, I felt exactly
the same way. The combination of your body healing and hormones changing
will definitely make you feel disconnected. I wish I could tell you how
long it goes on, but I'm sure it's different for everyone. But it will
pass. I'm happy to hear you are doing so well otherwise. Congrats on your
surgery!
— marcia5000
June 3, 2009
Yes, this is normal. I'm an extremely positive minded person and I've
weathered some pretty strong emotional storms in my lifetime. This surgery
was just another one of those times because of first, the surgery itself
and the unexpected shock of pain, then second, the release of those
fat-stored hormones that begin leaching out that cause that disconnected
feeling or for some, full blown depression. The sheer fact that you
recognize a change and difference in your mood says that you are going to
be okay. You're uncomfortable with how you feel right now but I promise you
will be your old self again soon, just a thinner version. Keep walking and
celebrate the little things like getting in your fluids, etc. Write in your
blog all that you are feeling and experiencing now. In a few weeks you can
then look back and see just how much things have improved. In summary, the
first week is the hardest. By the end of your 2nd week I'm sure you will
feel completely different. Hang in there. They don't call it a wild ride
for nothing. HUGS-Pat
— Arkin10
June 3, 2009
Hi Heather. You are normal. Feelings of depression , anxiety, etc are
normal after surgery. There is also the "let down" after any big
occasions..like Christmas for example. Try to take it one day at a time and
relax. Give yourself time to heal and adjust. You will undoubtedly need to
grieve for food. Since you will be eating so little of it in the next few
months. But once you start to lose weight and feel better, it will be a
whole new you!! You WILL feel sexy again, and if your hubby is
understanding, it will be better for him in a few , also. Congrats to you!
I am 11 months out and am just beginning to see the new me...but I started
feeling better about 4 months out...so hang in there and enjoy all the new
clothes you will getting!!lol Best of luck! hugs, kim
ps Exercise is great tention releaser...don't over do, but be consistant!
— gpcmist
June 3, 2009
Heather- Have hope...you are feeling what most of us feel at some time
after surgery. You just under went a major surgery and a major life-style
change. It will take time to fully adjust. It's wonderful that you have
such a supportive husband. He is right, things will get better. I am just
short of 6 months out and had my share of those days. They will pass!
Better days are yet to come. Congrats again and welcome to the losing side
of things.
LisaRae
— Fircrkr64
June 4, 2009
As everyone else has already said, we have all been there. I felt like I
was in someone else's body for about a month following surgery. I am five
months out now and life is great. Give yourself time, each day will be
better. Congratulations, you are getting healther every day!
— Elizabeth K.
June 4, 2009
hi my name is sandy i had the lap band done on january 5th 2009 and i feel
better then i have in a long time i started getting out of the house the
day after i came home and it helped me out a lot along with playing with
all the cats and dogs we have and talking with family and friends . i go
through each day with an up beat feeling and a smile ready to take on the
day . take care of your self sandy
— sandy fairweather
June 5, 2009
Heather,
I too went through this feeling. I would cry about everything, and I do
mean everything! I was converned too, I talked to my surgeon and my
regular dr and they both said that it is normal, but it shouldnt last
forever! I would say 3 weeks out I was feeling much better, emotionally,
physically... you name it. One month was much better for me, he even said
it could be the anethesia that can make people do that, I know thats true
because I have this problem everytime I go under! So.... I would say (and
Im not a dr) to make sure you are getting all your vitamins and maybe take
a little walk outside and take a deep breath, this too shall pass. :)
— hope78
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