Question:
Reply to "Im sorry if I've stepped on anyone's toes."

I've read everyones replies to your post and I have a thing or two or three to say (lol)... I understand from being where you are (pre-op) as most of us do... that you have done your homework and are trying the foods you are going to have to eat after surgery to get an idea of what you like before hand and you have it all worked out in your head and on paper that this is the way you are going to do things and that no matter what you arent going to eat the things you are told you shouldnt, and thats great... But, We have ALL told ourselves these things (trust me)... But there are going to be those days where you are upset, depressed, hormonal, lonely, didnt plan, or away from home, or whatever the situation might be and you either feel hungry (and you do get that hungry feeling back after time) or you can tell your energy level is down from lack of food and you need something NOW, you too will make a quick and probibly stupid or bad choice to eat something you shouldnt (we all have) and for someone to say they have "never" taken a small nibble of something that they shouldnt have are probibly not being truthful to themselves... And yes I agree that people have a addiction or relationship with food and that we need counciling for it to find out why we eat, when we eat and how to change the way we think about food, but if that was a "fix it all" then people wouldnt be getting the surgery, we would all have phsyciatrists and no one would be over weight... But this is the point im trying to make, No the surgery is NOT a "fix it all", they make our stomach's smaller so we cant eat as much, and they give us wonderful nutritional guidelines but we still have cravings, and thanks to this wonderful world we live in we meet temptation every day and that is something the Dr. cant fix, and yes going to a Phych and finding out your reasons for eating are great too but you have to leave thier office some time and they cant be with you all the time, and everyone has reasons they eat... So no matter how good your intentions are or how strict you are on yourself there will be a day that you too will make a poor choice because if you could be that strict on yourself you nor I or anyone else would be where we are/were in our weight... And this is my oppinion... but for you to critisize what, when or how people are eating is like someone who has never had kids trying to tell someone who does how to be a parent. God Bless you in your weight loss journey.    — Army Wife (posted on January 10, 2009)


January 10, 2009
OH THANK YOU SO MUCH. MY FEEL EXACTLY. I now that I have posted question only to feel that I did not belong on this page. But there a a lot of great and honest response that I have received for my question tha I really needed. But I thank you for that spill it was very mush need to a lot of people. zydeko47
   — zydeko47

January 10, 2009
AMEN!!! That was exactly my point, too. We do all make mistakes (and usually pay for them) tha we hopefully learn from. I know there has been many times I've been caught out unprepared...or prepared, but not prepared enough. That's the place I was yesterday. When I left the house at 8:30am to head to Legal (doing our POA's and wills), I had 2 protein bars in my purse. Yea, worked out that I was out of the house until after 5pm. I thought I was prepared with my 32oz jug of water and some protein bars. I wasn't. I ended up with a burger king cheese burger. I ate the patty and the cheese, tossed the bun. Even still, when I got home, I was starving. I had a headache, was weak, nauseous, and not very steady on my feet. What is a person to do when they pack a gallon ziplock with snacks and apropriate foods when they head to the ER with their child, only to find that you've spent well over 16 hours out???? I was prepared, but apparently not enough. It just happens and you have to make the best choice you can with what is available to you. You also have to understand that one bad choice doesn't mean you've failed. It only means you're human. Research is great, but it's not the same as living this life day in and day out for years. And it IS a life and not a diet. This is forever.
   — Launa N.

January 10, 2009
Totally agree. I can not find anything that I can enjoy so at this point I would try anything .... if I had an appetite! LOL. Maggie
   — nofrogs29

January 10, 2009
I totally agree, thank you for voicing this :)
   — dawnie28

January 10, 2009
What a much needed breath of fresh air and sorely needed. I don't come to the site much because of the "holier than thou" attitude that permeates the page if you so much as admit you have a glass of wine. Those aren't people I want to hang out with. I had RNY last June, have lost 60 lbs and feel great....I didn't follow the party line but I'm still thin and still losing....it is OK to be normal. I am definitely not obsessed with food, protein, water, exercise or anything else. I am just an average person getting through an average day.
   — Fredricka MacLean

January 10, 2009
Yes, I agree that we all make mistakes and we will ALL encounter temptation. HOWEVER, I think that what the original poster was saying was that a McDonald's DOUBLE CHEESEBUGER, is NOT a "slip"!!! A DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER is a deliberate choice. McDonald's has MANY other choices that would have been better for that person. It is a cop out to say "there was nothing else available", almost every place has at least ONE choice that is better than the rest! So yes, I agree that we will all have our difficulties with food at some point, maybe even many times, but the choices that you make when you have these problems, is a huge indicator of how your weight loss surgery is going to or NOT going to help you reach your goal. People are just kidding themselves if they think that they can eat like that and get to goal and stay there.
   — anitak

January 11, 2009
Anita K. I do understand the point she was trying to make that yes places do have other better choices, but so what if she wanted the double cheeseburger that is her choice and no one elses. SHE knows she made the wrong choice, and she is the one that is going to have to live with that choice. But for her to judge her and say "How can you be givin this lifestyle changing opportunity and eat something like a double cheeseburger?" For all the poster knows it could have been a first time Bad decision. I was just trying to let her know that it is not her place to judge anyone. She could have been more supportive (this "IS" a support site) by saying... ("You messed up, NO you shouldnt have had that double cheeseburger but thats OK! Pull yourself up by your boot strap and TRY not to do it again!") She didnt need to critisize her for something she allready knows she did wrong. We are all human and we will make bad choices in this weight loss journey and its "OK". We beat ourselves up enough as it is when we know we have made a bad choice, why the heck would we want to go to the one place where everyone should understands where we are coming from just to be beat up some more? I sure dont! Its not WHAT you say, its HOW you say it!
   — Army Wife

January 11, 2009
I didn't see the inital post from the pre-op person, but DITTO to the response from Army Wife! The doc fixes your stomach as a tool but does not fix your brain. All of us that are post-op have found that out, sometimes the hard way. Plus someone needing WLS has to have had SOME ISSUES to be obese enough to get this type of procedure whether it be RNY or Lapband. Hopefully all of these responses will help this person be more realistic post-op, it will make the journey alot better.
   — AuntPamcakes4six

January 12, 2009
AMEN SISTER!!! 5 1/2 years post op
   — Carlyn M.




Click Here to Return
×