Question:
eating disorder?
hello i am over 4 years out 62 inches tall and weigh 135 i feel very fat and i am obsessed with dieting to lose more weight,my family says to stop that i am small but i do not feel small i feel huge i was heavy for a few years not my whole life and feel that i have a fear that is greater than normal of being really big again which keeps me under control with eating and exercise i feel i am normal others say i am going to become anorexic need advice please i really don`t feel losing more weight is a bad thing at all but i am tired of fighting with family members about me having an eating disorder...:( — danergousluv (posted on October 13, 2006)
October 13, 2006
There is a fine line here.... I would ask you to be honest with yourself.
Are you forcing yourself to throw-up after eating (especially bad things or
cheats)? Are you going long periods of time without eating? Is your daily
caloric intake below 800 calories? Do you punish yourself if you get on
the scale and it tells you you gained 1/2 pound?
You have to answer those questions for your self honestly. We all have an
eating disorder that caused obesity. We have used food to cope. It is
easy to swing the other way and become obsessed to the point of an anorexia
or bolemia situation. Please find a happy lifestyle and go live your life.
If you can not do that due to your current situation, then go get help it
is available.
Sherry
— wealthgvr
October 13, 2006
To me an eating disorder is classified, not just by what we do but mostly
how we think...These feelings and thoughts you are having are causing chaos
and obsession in your mind..believe me I understand that so you are SMART
to realize it. Please find a qualified psychologist who has experience
with eating disorders and please get help. My obesity was an eating
disorder and I will always be a food addict personally, I belive that the
WLS I have has changed what I can eat, however, there are days that I do
slip into my old mode of thinking and sometimes acting. You need lots...of
support..and I know you will get help. By the way..my daughter was
anorexic and I watched her suffer so greatly...she did seek help and with
the help of her Mommie and Daddy, she has come so far!! I know this was
long, but I wanted you to know there is help! Take Care
— Karen Renee
October 13, 2006
Body image and self-image are two different things. Sounds like you're
having problems with both. My humble advice is to seek out a psychologist
near you that can help you with this. Your fear is well-founded, but out
of proportion. You've done a great job getting the weight off, now get the
psychological help you need. Its out there, close to you, and waiting for
you to ask. Warm aloha.
— gtali1954
October 14, 2006
At the risk of sounding redundant, I agree with everything everyone else
has said. Seek help. Obesity is a psychological problem that we wear for
the world to see. Anorexia is the SAME disorder. I never quite understood
that, but it all has to do with body image and never really having a grasp
on what we really look like, never being satisfied with how we look. I am
only 6 months out, I've lost 50 pounds and most of the time I can be very
happy about that. On bad days, I'm critical of how I look, I feel like I
haven't lost enough and want to lose it more quickly. When I was heavier,
I'd look in the mirror and couldn't see how fat I REALLY was, anorexics
look in the mirror and can't see how THIN they really are. When I was
thinner, I was never thin enough! It seems that somehow we just can't see
ourselves the way others do. We need to rely on numbers, scales, clothes
sizes and how we feel. If we are at a healthy weight and size, we need to
trust that we are OK because looking in the mirror is only a distortion. I
hope that makes sense. Bottom line, please seek a psychologist, if you
can't afford one, O.A. is a good place to start to at least talk to others
with the same disorder. Anorexics and bulemics also attend these meetings.
On the other hand, sometimes family members don't want to see us lose
more because they are jealous and afraid to see us change. Don't rely
totally on them, a good Dr. or Psychologist can give you a better more
objective perspective as to where you should be.
— Debra R.
October 14, 2006
original poster here...
i do not think i have an ed at all i think my family is grossly over
reacting , i have an obsessive compulsive personality and i use to have a
problem with bullima in my teens mostly heavy laxative abuse. but i guess
for me the problem is i say ok once i get here i will stop then i get there
and say ok once i get here i will stop and i don`t now my goal is 119 and i
will stop but i do not starve myself i eat healthy and exercise so there is
no way i am anorexic and not at my weight . i am just wondering when is my
inside going to say ok enough you are where you want to be,in highschool
and early adulthood and even after my kids i was a 7/8 now i am a 6 but
feel too big still. i also worry about the bounce back and keep waiting for
it to hit so i keep careful watch over my weight so i don`t get the bounce
back it has been over 4 years so still waiting on it to happen which freaks
me out i was heavy for about 3 years and i will never go back there when i
see carnie and al roker who have both gained back a substantial amount of
weight and have had trouble losing it again it freaks me out and makes me
that much more focused on keeping myself in check what is wrong with that?
— danergousluv
October 14, 2006
The very fact that you are 4 years out and still feel very fat and as you
stated in your original post that you are obessed with dieting, and you
stated a fear that you have is greater than normal would seem that you are
answering your own question, dear.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to lose more weight I was at 135 and
wanted to go to 125, which I have accomplished. It is not that that is a
concern to you in my opinion. First of all don't fight with the family
members when you seek help they will tell you the appropriate thing to tell
your family. The worst thing a family can do is needle and nag someone
with any kind of eating disorder. Just because you want to lose weight
does not mean you have an eating disorder. The fact that you are obessed
is a clue. In the long run the decision to seek help is ALWAYS yours and
yours alone. I wish you all the best and peace and contintment with this
problem. Feel free to email me personally anytime you wish. Take care and
be well.
— Karen Renee
October 14, 2006
I don't see your weight as a problem. At your height, you can weight
110-119 depending on your frame. The problem I do see it you obsession
over it, which you admit to. Any kind of obsession should be dealt with
through professionals. One of the problems about anorexia or bulemia is
denial. The biggest part of getting over those things is accepting what
they are as damaging to you, physically and psychologically. I feel that
anyone that loses a great deal of weight should be dealing with a good
therapist as many issues arise in the losing phase. It just makes good
common sense, and while you are trying really hard to say it isn't a
problem, what you write says it is. My 2 cents for what it's worth. I've
been there and done that. Regards~
— Statuesque
October 17, 2006
I am not a psychologist or anything, but have struggled with similar
issues. I believe you are asking because you know something is not ok. you
say your family is bugging you, but if you didnt feel there might be some
truth in it, I think you would just ignore them. You are questioning.
I think therapy with someone who is very experienced in eating disorders is
very important. My heart goes out to you. I know I persoanlly was on the
verge of a serious eatig disorder, and therapy helped me turn it around.
Focusing on health and fitness rather than impossible standards, and
learning to recognize when my behavior was unhealthy. big hugs, and feel
free to email me if you need to talk.
— **willow**
October 22, 2006
You sound as though you are not dealing with some mental issues regarding
your weight. You still have a FAT mentality. This is not uncommon. I
experience this myself, alot. Even though I can see that I have physically
lost weight and people say that I am small enough (5'4 - 145-150#s). I
still the fat thighs and big butt when I see myself in the mirror. The key
is to not obsess about your weight. You need to deal with your fears,
emotional issues - are your eating habits linked to your feelings of
sadness, happiness, boredom, depression? You're letting your fear take
over. Learn to like, love and accept the new you. Set a goal weight that
you would like to maintain rather than continue losing just to avoid being
overweight again. Find a counselor or support group. You're not the only
person who's experienced or is experiencing this and you won't be the last.
Find a counselor or good support group and talk to your physician &
nutritionist. If you become anorexic, you're only going to be dealing with
another weight issue, which can sometimes be worse than being overweight.
Anorexia leads to terrible behaviors, creates poor self image, destroys
relationships and can even cause death. Your family loves you and sounds
as though they are trying to be supportive instead of nagging. Seek
help!!!!
— CHARLYLVN
Click Here to Return