Question:
HELP PLEASE
Ok, I had my surgery, LapRNY 10-31-07, started at 374 and now at 233. My doctor's goal for me was between 170-190 and then I moved and my new doctor's goal for me was 225, at my support group I was given a formula to see how much weight I should lose, don't remember what it was something like 100 lbs for my height in feet and then so many pounds for the inches, anyway, with that formula, I should end up at 220, my personal goal is 199. My problem is that I am eating like crazy...all the time. If I eat something with too much sugar, I know that it will take an hour for the dumping to end and then I'll eat something else. Thank God my stomach can only hold so much cuz I know when to stop but it's like I get full and then as soon as the full feeling is over, I'm eating again. I want this to work, I don't want to fail. I've been thinking of doing slim fast to get me back on track. I'm at home all day and so every time I walk past the kitchen I'm grabbing a 100 calorie snack or something of that nature. I was like well, if I eat 10 snacks a day that's my 1000 calories...what a fool! I'm not even sure how many calories I should be eating. I hate, let me say that again, HATE exercising but I know I have to to get this weight off and keep it off. I'm just so mad at myself right now for not doing this right, I should have had the weight off by now. I'm still determined to get it off it's just taking me longer and I just can't get my head in the right place. Any suggestions for me??? I take my vitamins off and on, not regularly. It's hard because before I had my surgery, I was only taking one medication and now I've got all these vitamins and I either forget or just don't take them but when I get my bloodwork done, everything is good. Somebody give me some harsh "constructive" criticism to get me back on track. I've moved and there are no support groups in my area so I'm trying to do this on my own, HA!!! Thanks guys for listening. — PAWLLA L. (posted on October 26, 2009)
October 26, 2009
First, I think you have to ask yourself why you are doing this. If it's
boredom, then you need to think about fixing it. Perhaps you are hungry
because you are nutritionally deficient. In that case, you must eat good,
pure foods and must, must, must take you vitamins. Are you simply unhappy
and using food as an indulgence to soothe your soul?
So, is there anyone in your world with whom you can share your heart? If
not, make a connection here.
Best wishes from someone doing something similar.
Ariela
— arielared
October 26, 2009
I will add to my question that yes, I do eat out of boredom. I'm home all
day and find myself just eating to be eating not because I'm hungry. I
keep telling myself that I have to stop, I know I have to and I have to
come up with a plan. What I really need to do is exercise with all of this
free time on my hands. See, I know the right answers...it's just DOING it!
I'll be 41 in November and you'd think I'm old enough to know better.
Speaking of age, before I had my surgery, everyone always guessed me to be
in my 20's, even the day of my surgery, the nurses were surprised that I
was 38 but not now, all guesses are right around my age...ugh! The surgery
definitely aged me.
— PAWLLA L.
October 26, 2009
I think you are also having a lot of head hunger. Listen to your stomach
and not your head for hunger clues. This demon of head hunger will try to
win everytime. Don't let him. He wants you to sabatage your weight loss.
Write down what you are feeling when you get the urge to eat. Then step
back and look at the emotion and you will soon be able to identify what
kind of mood you are in when the food demon is coming. And it isn't bad to
eat food when you are hungry. Just make the right choice. You can eat as
late as you want to into the night if you want. Your body doesn't know
what time it is. It isn't the time you eat, it is what you eat. Pay
attention to actually being hungry or the food demon. LIsten to how your
stomach feels. Is it really growling or is it bored. It will take a lot
of deep soul searching before you can actually fix the food problem, and in
order for your surgery to work for you, you have a great tool (smaller
stomach) you need to find out why you are eating. Seriously, I had to cut
my ties with food before my surgery, because I knew it wouldn't work for me
if I didn't. I did a lot of crying during my soul searching days. This is
where you come to realize why you are eating what you are and why. It is a
emotional ride. So, sure I can tell you to go buy a lot of Slim Fast and
eat 3 meals a day/3 small snacks. But....If your head overcomes your heart
and your tool, you need to fix what is broken in your heart. I have more
info if you need to you can email me.
— Kristy
October 26, 2009
Hi..Just a thought..but why not go back to your original liq, soft food,
work your way back to get on the correct path. Then if having the snacks
in the house is the trbl get them out. Only have what you need. I set my
fridge as my things and the rest of the familys snacks are thiers. I only
eat to feed myself..not fill my hands. I'm not able to do exercise. But I
do try to keep me busy. As was sd by someone earlier..it is head
hunger..try to get that under control. I wish you luck..I am sure you
can/will do it!
— tootsie52
October 26, 2009
If there arent WLS groups in your area, have you checked for Overeaters
Anonymous?
The hardest thing about making the necessary changes for success is getting
your head in the right place. If there is no OA, please seriously consider
getting some individual counseling - with someone who understands eating
disorders and\or bariatric patients.
Your problem isn't your body or the food itself - it is your head and what
food has become instead of fuel. You CAN do this - you just really need a
chance to figure out what is empty inside (figuratively) that you are
filling with food.
Best of luck to you.
— mollyt
October 27, 2009
remember the rules...protein first! this is critical to losing weight.
Also chew 20 times, wait 5 between bites, no drinking and eating~ this one
makes more people regain after losing~ wait 30 mins after eating to drink
again,take your vitamins, journal, support groups...85%of people who attend
group on a regular basis keep the weight off. It keeps you accountable.
best of luck to you! hugs,kim
— gpcmist
October 27, 2009
First of all, Pawila, good for you for being honest with yourself! So many
people just want to hear the "sweet fluffy" stuff. I'm just going
to ditto two people above - get rid of those 100 calorie snacks and look
for an Overeaters Anonymous group. I know how you feel - I go through the
same thing but I think you have half the battle licked because you are so
honest with yourself and with us. I will be keeping you in the Light (a
beautiful Quaker saying).
— Muggs
October 27, 2009
Wow you have made an amzing change going from 374 to 233. You may need to
mentally adjust to the new image of you. I know this was part of my stall.
I felt I was not me.
Bored people eat to fill the time so find a hobby or something you like.
Join a club or group that does fun things. Get a pill organizer and do a
week of pills at a time in it. this will help you remember. Vitamins can
look good for a while then suddenly drop so be very careful. I have seen
people in wheel chairs due to lack of vitamin B1.
Sounds like you are trying to go back to a normal life and reclaim how
things were. No need for all the vitamins and watching what you eat. Try
eating protien for your snacks instead of carbs. This will be hard if you
are taking in a lot of carbs now. Nuts and jerky work good as snacks.
You have done a great job. Don't quit. You are doing great.
— trible
October 27, 2009
Another good resource is www.bariatricradio.com. John Joliffe is a
bariatric counselor with a call-in program each week. Even if you don't
call-in, he gives great advice to others who do. I've learned a lot just
listening to him. Also, he has an archive of past program topics which
helps you find the advice you're looking for. Just remember that you had
the surgery to improve your health and not just in hopes of looking better.
It's easy to get depressed, and quit caring about how you look, but
remember how much better you feel physically, and that you don't want to go
back to being unhealthy. That should motivate you to stick to a healthy
eating plan. You are worth it, and those who love you and want the best
for you deserve to have you around for a long time, functioning at your
best.
As far as the sugar. Remember that sugar tends to be addictive, it doesn't
fill you up, doesn't satisfy (only intensifies) your craving, and leaves
you hungry again within a short period of time. There is very little
nutritional value in desserts, candies, chips, etc. Since we get so little
to eat each day, we need to make our meals count (nutritionally). If we
don't get enough protein, vitamins, and minerals, we'll start to feel
sluggish, depressed, tired, have more aches and pains, and our immune
system will become compromised. Who wants that???? Next time you get a
craving for sweets, get out some of your bariatric cookbooks and look for a
recipe that sounds good. I suggest something with a lot of flavor (and
spice if you like it). Make yourself a very special meal, serve it to
yourself on the "good" dishes, and if possible, surround yourself
with good company. Enjoy your meal, savor it, and leave the table feeling
better about yourself instead of feeling guilty or like a failure. Please
be kind to yourself. We encourage others because we want what's best for
them. Love yourself enough to do the same for YOU. I hope this helps. I
wish you all the best on your journey toward good health. God Bless.
— KimM
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