Question:
Has anyone ever felt like.........

you would never ever have the surgery? Today is a really bad day for me I am so sad that it is pathetic--I just feel like this is not going to happen. I have met so many nice people here on AMOS and they all have gone on to have the WLS and I'm still sitting here on my fat ass feeling sorry for myself am I alone in this or are their other who have had similiar feelings--HELP!!!!!    — mischief85 (posted on September 11, 2002)

September 11, 2002
Hi Steph, Just remember what I said... Your day will come..I'll call you tonight. Love Ya Sarah
   — sarah C.

September 11, 2002
Please don't be sad, it makes me sad too. I know what that feels like and I know it hurts. I would never go back and change my surgery. Just keep your head held high. Most of the people on this site have gone through the same thing. At one point in my life I have up hope, didn't really care to live. But things will get better. ((hugs)), Sarah
   — Sarah K.

September 11, 2002
Oh believe me you are SO not alone!! I am feeling the same thing. I started this whole process back in May and I'm sure I won't have surgery before the beginning of the year. My papers are just now being submitted to insurance! I sometimes feel like there are so many hurdles to overcome. . .will I ever make it? What if insurance doesn't approve? What if the Dr.s find some medical reason I can't have it? I think we all second guess ourselves. I don't really have anyone to talk to because no one really understands what I'm going through. I have a lot of supportive family, but they don't under stand my anxiety about this process. I guess I can't think of anything I've wanted more than this surgery. I haven't felt really good in about 3 years and I'm tired of it. So hang in there and know that you are not alone. Lot's of us feel the way you do.
   — Kathy S.

September 11, 2002
No, you are not alone! I started this process back in January of 2002 and had by surgery Aug 6, 2002 (Open RNY now down 27 lbs.), but believe me, I shed many tears along the way. My insurance company required alot of testing (physcological, dietician, diet history......) and to top it all off, my boss asked me in March of this year if I would be offended if she also went to my Dr. (I really was happy for her at that time), BUT her insurance company only required that you be 100lbs overweight, no prior authorization needed!! She had her surgery in May of this year, I tried to stay really happy for her, but deep down, I was so sad. But, I will tell you this, my wait really was worth it, I think I was so much more prepared than her. I have had a complication free recovery (other than smaller portions, I really don't feel - physically - like I had major surgery!) And she has struggled both emotionally and physically. Sadly (well, maybe not sadly) I am currently looking for other employment, this is not a healthy environment to be in (there is some sort of jealousy or something), but in my journey so far I have decided that only I can live my life the way I want,and if I am unhappy, I have to do something about that. Again, I truly believe that the wait was worth it, if only for the mental strength you can gain from it. Believe me, I still remember the days that my chest would tighten at just the thought of waiting so long. Hang in there, you will be on the losing side soon!! God Bless!!!
   — Dana B.

September 11, 2002
I know exactly how you feel! I started my process in January of 2002. My consult is tomorrow, 9/12, hopefully with surgery the first part of 2003. Seems like forever! The one thing that I do appreciate is how much time I have had to be on line at this site and others and to learn so much more about the surgery than I knew in the beginning. Good Luck! It will happen for both of us in God's time. Sherry from MI
   — sherry H.

September 11, 2002
Yes. My ins denied me 2 times--direct exclusion. They seemed to think my dying of my comorbs would be cheaper than saving me. Who knows? So, for 11 months, I watched myself die by the inch, wrote letters to my loved ones, got as much done as I could and prepared to get off my feet and stay there til my lungs quit completely. There was a little hole in the ins laws of this state (WA) at that time, and suddenly, I was in. It was amiracle. BUt I do know the desolation of feeling that it will never, ever happen.
   — vitalady