Question:
Do you still see yourself as really big?

I am down 92 pounds and have gone from a size 24 to a 12/14 but when I look in the mirror, I see no difference. Has this happened to you? And to be honest when I was a size 24, I didn't think I was that big either!!    — Kristi S. (posted on May 3, 2007)

May 3, 2007
Yep, I have lost 81 lbs and I still don't see a difference in myself. Dropped 10 pant sizes, of course there has got to be a difference, guess all my eyes see is fat me! Good luck, Diane
   — Diane C.

May 3, 2007
Oddly enough, I don't see myself as BIG/FAT still. I see myself as the incredible shrinking woman..... I DO however, bump into tihngs or over commenstate for things since I used to be so big. I trip over my own feet, etc....stupid things like that occur. :)
   — jammerz

May 3, 2007
I too see myself as big/fat even though I have lost 160 lbs. My family thinks I am crazy and they are getting a little tired of me asking 'do I look fat?' but they are just going to have to get use to it until my brain catches up to what my eyes are seeing. Laural
   — Laural D.

May 3, 2007
I am glad you brought this up...I have lost 70 lbs and am getting closer to my goal weight...people tell me every day that I have lost enough and some even say I'm tiny!!!! I don't see myself as tiny. I tried on a dress today and thought it looked good in the front but my tush looked big...everyone thought I was crazy but I still saw the heavier me. I don't know if mentally I will ever see myself as thin but size 10 is pretty thin!
   — Sheri A.

May 3, 2007
You sound normal to me. Lots of the women at my support group say the same thing. I am still quite large. I have lost over 70 lbs and have another 100 to go. When I look in the mirror I can not see much of a change but if I compare pictures from before and now I can see it. Still it is a lot to get your head use to. I just hit your size 24 and it seems wonderful to me. I started out a 32. Frankly I see people everyday much larger than my 32 ever was and they don't repulse me at all. I did this because of my health. This smallness is just an extra perk. I need to be able to move again. I think like everything else we have gone through it will just take time to get use to. Good luck and God Bless, Norma
   — njkbutton

May 3, 2007
It is amazing to read the comments. I thought I was the only one. I have lost 120 lbs. Gone from size 24 to a 10/12. I am 1 1/2 years out of surgery and it is still hard for me not to see the fat person instead of the healthy person. One reality check for me was getting on an airplane and the seat belt buckled with plenty of room left. I literally cried because before I could not buckle it at all. I keep looking at before pictures to remind myself that yes at a size 24 I was big but did not see it myself. When I see a picture of myself now I do a double take because I still don't perceive myself as that new person. It is getting better. Just remember you are a healthier person and keep being positive and it will gradually sink in.
   — Vera B.

May 3, 2007
I too, still see myself as a fat person. I started as a size 34 or 36 8 months ago and now I am in a 14-16. Just this morning I was folding clothes and ran across some pants and I had to ask my husband if our neice had left clothes at our house last time she was there and then I realized they were mine. I have found it helps to keep a fat picture up where I can see it. I keep one at work and one taped to the mirror at home. Stay strong & don't let it get you down. Happy Weight Loss!
   — Lost4Ever

May 3, 2007
I am 20 mths out and still do not always see the new me(360 to 156). I have found it helpful to keep an old and new picture next to each other. I have gone from 28's to 8/10's and when I worry is it working I try on those 28's. I have gone for counseling on this also. It is hard to see the changes since I was larger longer than I have been smaller.
   — msgief

May 3, 2007
Kristi, I truly think we all feel that way. Most of us have been heavy set most of our lives. I am almost 1 year post-op and I still see myself with my large bottom half. I have went from a 32 to a 14/16. But when I look in the mirror I still see byself as large. I believe that since it took us so long to get to the point we were at when we had out "life changing experience" that it just doesn't happen over night that we will see all the "changes" in our outter self. I know my Aunt came to me right after my wedding and told me, "I believe you need to STOP trying to lose weight. Your face is sunken and you don't look good." Well to be honest I have been at the least in size a 22/24 since 1984. We she can't remember me any other way then to have a full-puffy face, and being heavy. She has forgotten that I use to be a 14/16 back when I was a JR in high school, oh yes and back then I was FAT. LOL I truly think it takes a while for our heads to catch up with our bodies. Just give things time!
   — Sheila_E

May 3, 2007
Before I lost 70lbs, I was wearing a size 26/28. I didnt see myself that big. Since I lost the 70lbs wearing a size 18/20, I do see a difference in my weight. Im still big and got another 75lbs to lose, but I feel better and know I look better.
   — barfiep01

May 3, 2007
Oh Kristi, you have hit on a true lie that our head does to us. I am over 3 years out, and I still see myself as fat and obese in my head. I took pictures of myself every month for the first 6 months and then at one year to see how I had changed. I still keep a photo in my wallet of my original size to pull out if I need to. When I look in the mirror, I still see the 242 pound woman who had surgery. The photos remind me of the change, and I know the truth that I am not fat, but my head has not wrapped around that truth yet. Because I know the truth about my size, I don't believe the mirror or my head when I feel fat, I trust the truth that I am a size 4/6 and that photos don't lie. This helps me a lot. I have said it many times, Obesity is a head issue, and this is a head issue. You need to find a way to teach yourself the truth about your weight loss so you know the truth, even though your mind is telling you something else. Have you ever seen the movie "A beautiful mind"? It's the same type of concept. He knew that people around him were really not there, and put up boundaries to help him know reality regardless of what he was thinking. I am so thankful to God for His grace in giving me this tool, and I don't want to every be ungrateful for what I have, so I put up boundaries to protect my pouch and try to walk in truth about His Word, God's grace and salvation, and my precious tool with wls. Take care, keep up the good fight and congrats on your weight loss so far! Sincerely, Patricia P.
   — Patricia P

May 4, 2007
Well in my own experience, I never really 'saw' myself as the huge person that I was... I mean, I KNEW it, but never truely FELT it. It's hard to explain. I was always the fat girl, from elementary school and up, so I was VERY aware of what I was, but as I got older I was a very well put together and stylish girl, and kind of made the weight thing secondary, you know? After 2 babies in 2 years and a miserable marriage, depression and lossof hope set in as my weight went up to 338 lbs and my health started to suffer. When my periods stopped as a result, it was time to do something. When I did lose the 170-ish lbs, it was a blur and I didn't really notice any differance until I could SEE MY COLLAR BONES!!! To me, that was it, I had arrived. To me, it was like, 'Oh, there I am!!' I felt like I was back, like this the REAL me, and the other wasn't, never was. I guess I didn't see myself as the "fat lady" or notice all that goes with it after I grew up (denial, I'm sure), so when I got to goal, I just felt like "myself" finally. Maybe it's weird, alot of others seem to have such a different outlook, but this is just MY experience... hope it helps!!
   — CharlieGirl

May 4, 2007
The answer is yes, it's called body dysmorphia. I wrote a research paper on this disorder. Take an old picture and a new picture and place side by side on your mirror, you will start to recalibrate your brain to accept the new you.
   — R. biles

May 4, 2007
Pick up the book "Passing for Thin" by Frances Kuffel. This book is great and an easy read for facing the mental end of losing weight. It's a story about a woman who would lock herself up and eat - she finally got straightened away and lost a bunch of weight and it is her story toward thin. I know myself I have this image of myself... whether I weigh 150 or 300 pounds. This is the image I see in the mirror - it's NOT what comes up when someone takes a picture though. the book addresses it. I highly recommend it to all.
   — Lori A.

May 4, 2007
As you can see you are not alone. Heck after losing just about 200lbs I still find myself wandering to the plus size clothing when I wear a misses size. If you ever doubt yourself haul out some old pictures. I look at mine and think DANG, never knew I was that big! From 350lbs to 150lbs...been there,felt that!
   — tazthewiz23

May 4, 2007
I have often felt the same way. I had the surgery on Sept 28, 2006 and have lost 75 pounds or so. I was in a Size 18 (tightly squeezed into a size 18, that is) and am now in a Size 10. I even fit into a Size 8 from Old Navy. Even though I know I've lost the weight, and even though people are constantly telling me how great I look, I still see the same old fat me in the mirror. I think this is a psychological thing. We've dealt with our weight for so long and it's hard to believe it is no longer a burden we carry. I also didn't think that I was "that big" when I was morbidly obese. I saw a Size 18 pair of pants the other day in the store and cried when I saw how big they were because I realized at that moment how big I had been. Kudos to you for your great weight loss. You're doing great...now you just need to convince yourself of that.
   — missystj

May 5, 2007
My experience is that when I look at myself in the mirror, I'm only seeing part of myself.... what I don't see when I look in the mirror is how "thick" or "wide" I am..... for instance, I get a very different image when I face the mirror than when my hip/shoulder face the mirror. Hope this makes sense.
   — mrsidknee

May 5, 2007
Even when I weighed 140 or less I thought I was fat because I didn't weight 115. I concentrated on how thick my legs were rather than how tiny my waist was. When I started putting on weight it was just a sort of confirmation of fatness and didn't feel like a new condition. So I sort of denied the importance of each 10# gain until there were over 10 of them. RA
   — SusanJH

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