Question:
MALE ISSUES SEEM TO BE UNEXPLORED HERE. WHY?

I am thanking about having the wls. I came to a website like this one to get some (real people's feelings and views)and it has been very helpful in my research on wls, but the view and feeling seem to be very one sided here and on other website such as this. You have 20 different women's issues good as well as bad, and they are helpful no matter what your sex is, but men and woman are still different. As a man I have questions that only a another man will be able to answer. This is just a suggestion and I do not mean to separate the guys from the girls, but it would be even more helpful for other men such as myself to better understand the pysical and mental parts of the wls.    — EDDIE S. (posted on November 13, 2002)


November 12, 2002
I totally agree but it has always been that way. I am always open to questions etc. Feel free to contact me.
   — snicklefritz

November 12, 2002
Eddie, there are just more women that seek out this surgery than men. An overwealming majority in fact. It's not that mens issues are less important in any way, just more women. And women tend to talk more and share more by nature anyway. There are some men that are active in this site, and their input in invaluable. Stick around and be a part of it, your input will be invaluable too. ~~hugs
   — RebeccaP

November 12, 2002
I am active here, but just on the answering side of this forum. I don't have many questions and those I have, are usually directed towards my local support group members. If you have any questions, please feel free to e-mail me through my profile...JR
   — John Rushton

November 12, 2002
I notice many men at my surgeons office having surgery (large practice) but men tend not to ask for help, join support groups, share on line. This is not just here but it is men in general. Women will discuss vaginal dryness, men will not discuss their sexual problems. But there are many men here that just lurk and do not post and I am sure you e-mail to each other. Some of the best posts I receive are from men, Bob Haller, Jack, Robert etc. You just don't get quantity.
   — faybay

November 12, 2002
I kinda like hanging out with the ladies, but I know what you mean... See my profile, men as a group loose FASTER! WLS for me was a success. It does not fix the rest of your life:( Bills still need paid, laundry needs done. If surgery worked as great on that stuff as it does weight I would have my own private butler.:) The great news is we finally bought a scanner and found some really good pre op pictures. So all we need is some pot op ones and I will update my profile. We are thinking of putting our pre op christmas photo from a few years ago along with a current one. <P> Please excuse me I got off thwe subject. Anyhow what questions do you have? Feel free to e mail me as well and be sure to attend local support group meetings!
   — bob-haller

November 12, 2002
Hiya Eddie. AMOS doesn't purposefully intend to come across as more informed on women's issues before/after WLS. For one, you have to consider that there are many more females having WLS. And secondly, women tend to talk about it more- asking questions as well as answering. You will find several really great fellas here (such as those who have already posted to you) who are more than willing to help you with any questions you may have. Also, POST your questions and in the subject area, be sure to put that its a male issue or exactly what it is about so it comes up as that when someone does a search. Maybe that'll help other men who are in the same boat as you.....Take care!...Karen (lap rny- 9/20/02- down 64 pounds!)
   — karmiausnic

November 12, 2002
Eddie, there are enough guys here that we are able to answer most or any of the questions you have. I am 8 months out on Friday, had my surgery the same day as Al Roker, and when I was just starting out I had the same questions you do and didn't find a lot of guys that could answer them. We also used to be able to post our questions anonymously, so if we had a very "sensitive" question, we didn't fear the embarrassment of everyone knowing who we were or emailing us at home, thus allowing our wifes to see what kinds of questions we had been asking. I would ask you to read my profile. It will take you a while because I have been very proactive in keeping it up to date. Please, never hesitiate to ask questions on this board or to me or the other guys personally. We are all part of a large family (no pun intended)! We all need to be here for each other, plus, like Bob said before, it's kind of cool hanging out with all the ladies on here. The conversations can be fun and interesting!
   — Robby E.

November 13, 2002
Perhaps after last nights Dateline with Al Roker things will pick up in the male department here. I have a feeling that a lot of people are calling their doctor offices this morning.
   — Natalie M.

November 13, 2002
1. Men do not in general ask questions since they prefer to be the ones with all the answers. 2. Every guy who has raised an issue has had it addressed. Lastly, could you please give me a couple of examples of "questions that only another man can answer"? I am curious as to what those questions might be...
   — merri B.

November 13, 2002
Hi!! My hubby had WLS 2 years ago.. he started at nearly 500 pounds and now he is at 250 pounds. Next month he will have his "loose skin issue" taken care of and they believe that 50 pounds will be taken off. If you have ANY questions or concerns, My husband can answer them. We both had the surgery and believe me.. we have been thru every kind of issue or question concerning the "male" part of the surgery. Feel free to email him at [email protected] or you can look up his profile under David Barr.
   — danabky

November 13, 2002
Eddie, I am 2 months post-op open RNY. I will be glad to try and answer any questions you may have. I am 6'2" and was 376.5 day of surgery. I have lost 63lbs in 2 months and I am currently 313.5.
   — Jeff B.

November 13, 2002
I am male and I am 4 weeks post op. I have had several friends who have had WLS. My brother in law had the surgery 6 months ago so he could answer any male questions I had. I would be happy to answer anything I can for you. Just email me at [email protected]. I will answer anything I can.
   — Tim E.

November 13, 2002
Here are afew real examples Merri... My penis has gotten longer after surgery has anyone else had this happen? Or what is your testosterone level and has it increased or decreased after surgery? How about your libido? If any guys have answers to these questions let me know. Thanks
   — Robert L.

November 13, 2002
Oh my...I am definitely limiting my future dating to men who have had WLS (giggle)...
   — rebeccamayhew

November 13, 2002
I'm very active on the website as well. I think we men are just less apt to ask personal questions. I'd be happy to answer any questions you have about the surgery and I see a lot of familiar names on this list below that I'm certain would be very willing and able to help you out. You can email me at [email protected]. Good luck to you. - Mike
   — Michael N.

November 13, 2002
Thanks, Bob, for that oh-so-informative answer. I have to agree, there are definitely some things a guy must find out from another guy. I appreciate you expanding my point of view....(fighting the impulse to clap my hands over my ears and yell LA-LA-LA-LA-LA....)
   — merri B.

November 13, 2002
Hey the guys are here too. I regularly read and answer almost daily. I suggest if you want answers from men, pose your questions to them, such as "Hey Fellas, Have you ..." etc. We will respond.
   — ERICK B.

November 13, 2002
Robert - To answer your questions, I think "he" (I don't want to embarrass Merri any more by saying the "p-word") is more prominent because of the shrinking of the pubic fat pad. I don't think he actually gets longer *G*. As far as my testosterone level, it was low before WLS and is now in the normal range. The libido has increased too...JR
   — John Rushton

November 13, 2002
Hello, five weeks and a day out and down 33 lbs. I would be happy to answer any thing you would want to discuss. email to: [email protected]
   — Steve B.

November 13, 2002
John, I think it's because the surgery affects your eyesight. For some strange reason, I flew on an airplane yesterday and the seat looked bigger and longer also, LOL.
   — Michael N.

November 13, 2002
Cannot help you in the penis department (but then is that really an "issue"?) - but I can (unfortunately) tell you that my testosterone levels have not changed enough for my liking.
   — Karen R.

November 13, 2002
I have to ABSOLUTELY agree with Robert. There is a LOT more to work with in the "P" department...a LOT more!
   — Robby E.

November 13, 2002
Robert, kudos on your shrinking body and congrats on your new extension! ;)
   — Debbie W.

November 13, 2002
Yep I am turned on ALL the time! Its been this way since a few weeks post op. Lets just say I am waiting for my sex crazed teenage wife Jen to be like me. she hasnt arrived yet.:(:(
   — bob-haller

November 13, 2002
Oh what the heck were all friends here. My best friend at our wedding asked the following question..:( How does something this long get THIS FAR?:( Well he was right. Much improved now......:)
   — bob-haller

November 13, 2002
I'm with one of the previous posters, I'm only dating men that have had wls too! :)
   — Jamie H.




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