Question:
Post op weight gain

Please help. I am almost three years post op. Lost 140# went from a size 24 to a sexy size 8/10. Got married. Got pregnant. Had a stillborn son. Three months later pregnant again. Baby was premature (1 pound 11 ounces). She was in the hospital for three months. When I got her home she (still) is six months old, eats every 3 hours and so do I. I have gained 27 pounds. I don't know if the stress has finally caught up to me. Is it harder for post ops to lose weight? What should I do? I am out of control. I am eating to medicate myself. I have lost a child, a job, have a new marriage and a new baby. I am not trying to make excuses, but honestly my surgery was bad. I almost died. Now here I am a size 14+    — MARCY (posted on December 19, 2005)

December 19, 2005
hi marcy - i too am 3 yrs post op and don't have any of the problems you have but have gained almost 40 pounds back (i originally lost about 150)! my eating is out of control and i never get full anymore so i just keep eating. i'm so disgusted with myself ( i went from 325 to 164, but now i'm 200 lbs). i went on jenny craig because they supply the food and you don't have to do anything, and i lost 17 pounds, but i stopped and gained it all again. i don't know what to do next. i refuse to gain all this weight back though, so i have to do something fast. it seems like alot of us have gained alot of weight back and talk about getting a revision done, but i don't know if i want to get another operation. if anyone has any suggestions, i sure would love to hear them - good luck marcy with everything! love, ann
   — ann6088

December 19, 2005
Hey there, Marcy. I have not yet had my surgery. I went to all the pre-op stuff last week. When I read your email, I remembered what my nurse said about this situation. She said that #1 we should go back to the beginning, go back on liquids for a few days, then start on small amounts of solids, make sure we are getting all of our water. She said to do all the things we did in the very beginning. I don't know what your DR. gave you, but mine gave me a 'what to do now' list. Refer back to that to get started again. You will be surprised at how much you have gone from it. #2 call and get an appointment with a psycologist. It will probably really help you to go and talk to someone. Also, you can go back and read your origional goals for wanting to have the surgery done. My sister had it done a year ago, and she is having this problem too. Life gets in the way sometimes. I encourage you to make time for yourself. Make the calls, go see the Dr., what ever it takes! You are worth being your best, and if you don't think you are there, then don't accept it! Keep pushing on, until you get there! Good luck, and I am sorry you had to go through so much. Life is not fair. God bless.
   — Sandra.M

December 19, 2005
Hi Marcy, Though I have not had the exact experiences that you've gone through...i'm 3 1/2 years out. My new husband and I are trying to get pregnant, and when that happens I know that I will probably freak out about the amount of weight I gain, but.......talk to the "normal" people out there and you'll find that it's just a natural part of the process...you have a baby, you are bound to gain weight. The thing that YOU have to take control of is what and how you handle that after the fact. You are no longer dealing with the surgery....you are dealing with your everyday choices and how you choose to live your life on a day to day basis from this point on. Surgery can get you to a certian point, beyond that point....it's purely up to YOU. YOU have the tool to use at your will. None of us want to go back to who we were and what we had to go through before. But (laughing) when starting a family, we ALL make concessions. Even the everyday skinny chicks that we all love to hate. HEY...Pickles, chips and ice cream just HAVE to come at a price. I started at almost 300#. After 3 1/2 years I maintain at about 150. This is where I'm comfortable (if I lost any more I'd have to have a lot more cosmetic surgeries than my abdominoplasty to feel comfortable) that I could participate in soceity. Do you think that perhaps you could just be experiencing POST-PARDOM depression and nothing that is any way related to your G/B surgery. Women all over the world have had to deal with this exact issue. (Thank you Brooke Shields and the crazy couch-jumping Tom Cruise) Don't over analyze. It may not be a G/B thing at all. Perpahps just watch the mood swings, don't lose yourself in becoming a first-time mother (get out and be active) and don't give into the "sacrificing for the family" mentality attitude. I know that happens with first-time mothers sometimes. If you don't look out for your PHYSICAL and MENTAl health first, then you are letting everyone down. I think you are being too hard on yourself. You were with child, now your not. Give your body some time and you hormones and mind some time to adjust. You'll get back ontrack. MANY of G/P women have concquered the mystic of childbearing and still maintaining their figure. You are MARRIED, I'm going to assume to a man that loves you. Don't at this point in time get hung up on the 27 lbs. I could almost guarentee that if he's a man worth loving and loves you...he's looking at that child with stars in his eyes and looking at you the same way, no matter what any scale has to say. He's marveling in that fact that a woman could love him enough to carry and bring a child into this world that she's bound to love, bandage the scrapes and tell her that when her daddy was away, he loves her. Take pride in THAT. GAINING weight is a very real fear for all of us. BUT you are going through on of life's most rewarding experiences. Don't trip out too much. Just think of if of a minor set-back....or water-weight gain....you ARE breast feeding, right???? :-)
   — Michelle S.

December 19, 2005
Hi, many people 2 plus years out gain some weight. Ironically, 20 lbs seem to be the standard gain. So, the good news is, you are not alone. You have been through alot of trauma. I would suggest getting some help. Whatever help you feel you need for the emotional roller coaster you are going through. You are aware you are sabotaging your success. Keep us posted and we are here for you. Paula
   — shoutjoy

December 19, 2005
Hi, Congratulations on bringing your baby home. That must have beena huge relief. You only gained 27lbs with 2 pregnancies, you should really beproud of yourself! Just get back to eating basics of protien and water. You need to have the energy to take care of that new baby so don't starve yourself. Have a merry Christmas and enjoy all the firsts like your baby's first Christmas.
   — catleth

December 19, 2005
Oh my, you have been through alot. It might be a good idea to get to a counselor of some sort to aid you, or even a religious leader if that is what you prefer. You have had a challenging time. I am only 9 months out so I can't give the 2-3 year insight. But I gained 55 lbs with my first child and was only able to get 35 lbs off. That was before my WLS. So the weight gain issue is common. I can imagine that all that stretching can create somewhat of a different experience post surgery. I bet you are being too hard on yourself. To get back on track try going back to a nutritionist who can give you a food plan for post partum. That may help both issues. Congrats on that baby being home finally. There may also be a local support group for premature babies/parents. Other parents may give great insight into the emotions you are feeling and by validating those feelings, you may have energy for other things. My prayers are with you.
   — ppaige

December 20, 2005
I have also gained alot of weight, 5 years post op. I lost 120 but in the last year I gained 50lbs, with something other members are saying is pica and a vitamin defiecency. I didn't know about the revision. I am going to check it that I believe. I will keep you in my prayers. Jamie
   — visualizefate

December 20, 2005
STOP the bad habits NOW. Go back to basic. You know what to do. Small portions, protein shake, low carbs and on line to air out with us and other support groups your problems. You have all the tools. Find out why do you need to hide behind the fat? Once you have the answer it will be easy to stick to a new eating habit. You did it before, you know how to do it again.
   — Dani96