Question:
Has anyone felt "what have I done?"
, even if you wanted the RNY so badly and needed it? I am 1.5 wks post-op and am really having a tough time dealing with this thought. I chose this way of life and there is no turning back (not that I'd really want to), but this is really a difficult time. Any ideas? — kkbaball (posted on June 15, 2008)
June 15, 2008
It's a totally normal reaction! You are still "fresh" out of
surgery. Your body needs time to heal. You are still dealing with some
pain. This is natural for being this early out. As you feel better (daily
bit by bit) and you see the weight come off, those thoughts change. It IS a
lifestyle change, no doubt about it, but as you begin to see results AND
you start to really feel better the "what have I done?" turns
into "THANK GOD I HAD IT DONE."Just rest assured it WILL get
better with time.
It will be 11 months for me as of the 30th. I've lost my weight (120
pounds) and am now a bit below my "goal" I feel GREAT and am
healthier then I've been in YEARS.
— Leprechaun
June 15, 2008
Kili, Relax and enjoy everything your about to do. I am out 1 year and in
30# i will have lost 300lb. to loose 300 # is the most amazing feeling I
ever expierianced in my life. I was feeling the same way you do but that
will pass. This is the begining of a whole new thing for you and in 6
months you will be a whole new person. when people ask me what it feels
like to have lost the weight I lost I cant even begin to say how I feel. I
dont EVER remember feeling so good.
Please relax and dont rush things. Remember always eat to live don't live
to eat, and most of all don't look at how far you have to go, look at how
far you hace come. E-Mail me anytime. [email protected]
— obx100
June 15, 2008
Hang in there, Kili. WLS is a real change, you're right. You are likely
mourning for your previous life, which was so easy compared to this. This
new life can be a bit overwhelming, especially at first. And if you are not
feeling all that great or are sore, it is even tougher. I am 99.9% sure
that time will make a huge difference. It is difficult to make food,
protein and water intake, and exercise the focus for your life right now,
but it will get easier as it becomes part of your natural self. Best
wishes, dana
— jujuprof
June 15, 2008
Yes Kili, I felt the same way in the beginning. You are adjusting to a
whole new life. Watching other people eat "normally" and the
relationship with food has to be changed. But for me, it only lasted a
short time. I am 5 years out, and still feel like it is the best thing I
ever did for myself! My life has been forever changed, for the better. I
still have dumping issues, still have days where I feel nauseated after
eating for no apparent reason, but wouldn't change going through with the
surgery. Best wishes to you! "This too shall pass!" Rhonda
— rjh729
June 15, 2008
You must ave read my blog from 6 months ago when I came out of surgery. I
came home and I was just feeling depressed and down. I had to push my self
to eat, slush and every other task that I did. I promised my Doctor that I
would start excersizing after two weeks, so I went to the Gym and that was
so embarsing. Everyone there was go a mile a minute, and were slim and
well built, but I got on a bike and when as long as I couyld, about 6
minutes, so the next day I was determined to do 7 minutes. I kept that up
to I could do 30 minutes, which was at 30 days after surgery. Then I added
other equipment and finally got up to 1-1/2 hour in the gym. Those skinny
people have become freinds and cheer me on and offer assistance in learning
new equipment. One recomended a personal trainer to me and I hird him once
a week to help me out. That got me introduced to streching classes and
those are free with my gym membership. I found out I had mood swings from
the weight loss and I had to go to a anti-depressent drug. Today i is all
worth it as I have lost nearly 120 Lbs, feel great and am at a weight that
is not my goal yet, but less than I weighed in college. It was 6-8 weeks
before I felt that I did the right thing. I feel like a fool for ever
doubting myself, but I fine that I was not alone. You are at the start of
a great and rewarding trip down the road to slim. It is hard to accept the
new healthly life style, but today, I go out and socilize with my freinds
and I don't miss carbs, sugar, fat, or dirnking. Water is my drink of
choice, and I am told by my feinds they wished they could do the same. The
food establishments that I go to know my diet requirments and many charge
me half price for my meal as I can not eat a whole meal. I don't have to
say a thing, they all know. I have people every day that tell me how good
I look, and people that looked slender to me before tell me I am enspiring
them to take a few pounds off. I am just 6 months out, but what a
different 6 months can make. You will too be sucessful, and we all wish
you the best of success. Now look to the future and forget the poresent
challenges for a few hours, and congradulations on taking the right step
toward success!
— William (Bill) wmil
June 15, 2008
Hi Kili, I am 2 1/2 weeks out of lap rny. It sure is a new way of life.
It's hard getting all proteins and fluid in. Some days better than others.
Every Dr. has their diff. rules for us to follow. Just do as YOUR DR. says.
I'm on stage 3 pureed diet but I've been able to take small bites at a time
at chew till things were like pureed. For breakfast yesterday, had 2
scrambled eggs 14g protein, 150 cal. with 1/8th cup 2% cheddar cheese 4 1/2
g protein 22 cal. Eat very slow. Wait 1/2 hr before and after then can have
fluids. It's not until I can have my fluids that I feel better. As for
getting in and out of bed or chair. Press a pillow were it might hurt as
you breath out as your getting up. I find that if I don't do much and sit
around I get weeker. I need to make it a point to walk around more, and do
a little more each time which will build up my stamina. Everyone looses at
a diff. rate so don't let that concern you. As for me, I have not had any
complications, and so far lost 24lbs since consult date of 5/1/08. wls on
5/28/08. Hang in there it will get better. Michele
— helpmelord
June 15, 2008
my first reaction is THIS IS NORMAL. you ARE in the hardest time right now,
for sure. The first 2-4 weeks (depending) is the hardest - the "oh,
what did I do", "why did I do this", "this is so hard,
what was I thinking?" etc. with each passing day, things get easier,
mentally, physically, all aspects. hang in there good buddy - you will do
just fine.
— jammerz
June 15, 2008
I had my surgery on June 11, and am feeling the same way. I am overwhelmed.
I feel like I am not eating enough protein, but cannot handle eating any
more yogurt, jello, etc. I am afraid I will eat the wrong thing. I have not
taken any pain medication since I have been home, really in no pain. I have
a lot of burping. I am trying to keep fluids in. I am worried when I start
the stage 3 diet that I will eat the wrong things.
— rls0508
June 15, 2008
Hi..what everyone has said is correct! The first few weeks are hard...I had
my surgery a week before Xmas and thought I had made the biggest mistake of
my life. But I am here to tell you that it gets so much better! I am 18
months out and I am just fine and most importantly I am healthy and look a
whole lot better, too! Hang in there!
— Kristi S.
June 15, 2008
I had the same feeling as your having bit I am doing all over agin July 2
with a revision. Lost 100;bs and at a stand still. I would it in heart beat
again. Good Luck.
— [Deactivated Member]
June 15, 2008
Hi Kili,
I felt that way the minute I woke up from surgery! I continued to feel
that way until I went back to my surgeon one week out from surgery and I
had lost 20 lbs! Now I'm 2 and half months out and I've lost 47 lbs. I no
longer think "What have I done?" and I've made major changes in
my life. Like no sugar, no candy, no pasta, and no Dr Pepper! They
haven't been difficult choices like I thought they would be. I no longer
take meds for diabetes, now I think , "what a blessing!"
instead. Hang in there, you will get through it!
— irish4girl
June 16, 2008
Everyone goes through that phase. You just have MAJOR surgery and it can
mess with your mind. Hang in there - it will get better. I had my surgery
Feb 18 and have lost 66 pounds, have gone from pants size 26 down to 18. I
feel better than I have felt in years. I'm also off my blood pressure
medicine and hope to be off insulin soon. Keep your chin up. You'll thank
yourself later.
— SLittle1
June 16, 2008
Hi, Kili I felt the same way I thought I had made the biggest mistake in my
life. But, It was the best decision I made. I am almost 3 months
post-op. You will realize that once the weight starts coming off. A great
support system and support group also helps. You are not alone!!!!
Mini
— minimckenna
June 17, 2008
Oh, Kili ... been there, done that. While I've never had any real or
lasting regrets about having my VBG in 2000, the first few weeks after the
surgery were hell on earth. You feel like eight miles of bad road, are
completely disinterested in food for the first time in memory, have to lie
down for a couple of hours after walking the 300 yards to the mailbox and
back, etc., etc. The bottom line here is that surgery is a major and
life-changing event, and even if you went into it (as I sincerely hope you
did) with your eyes wide open and fully understanding the risks and
rewards, there's bound to be some hesitancy afterward, when you're
vulnerable in so many ways. If it makes you feel any better, I had exactly
the same thoughts after I had my children (both were born by c-section, so
there was surgery involved there too) -- and there was no "do
over" or "give backs" for that one, either. Don't be so
hard on yourself. If you want to sit in the corner and weep, sit in the
corner and weep. Your body is busy adjusting to its new self, and your
mind might need a while to catch up. Courage, my dear, and blessings ....
— Cheryl Denomy
June 18, 2008
Your thoughts are so normal. I am 6 months out from open RNY and I
remember very vividly thinking the exact same thing! It was Christmas
time, I was miserable, in pain, depressed and angry at my doc for requiring
me to walk a mile starting with day# 3 post-op. I couldn't hardly get up
off the sofa, couldn't sleep well and couldn't keep my vitamins down. I
was watching everyone else enjoy all the Christmas goodies while I tried to
choke down pudding and broth and I was angry. I had to keep reminding
myself that the surgery was my choice but I was a mess !!! I had a quite a
few puking episodes early on due to a stoma stricture as well which scared
the crap out of me. (not as bad as it sounds and easily remedied). If all
that wasn't enough, showering with that annoying drainage tube and resevoir
swinging from my belly and wearing the itchy scratchy girdle about my
abdomen was the icing on the cake. I was miserable!!! I made myself go to
the gym starting with day #4 post-op but I was cursing the doctor everyday
for the first week. I tried my best to live "the rules" and
every day the new lifestyle got easier and easier. Just hang in there cuz
it really does get easier and it will not be long before you will start
seeing the weight fall off as YOU follow the "rules". It was a
matter of about a month when I realized that I had not only made a good
decision but that having the surgery was a "gift". I would do do
it all over again for sure. Now when I look at obese people who need the
surgery but do not have access to medical insurance or the financial
resources I feel so BLESSED. The answer to "What have you done?"
is ......you made a decision to live a healthy new life and to eat to live
instead of living to eat. You have just added to the length and quality of
your life. You have been blessed so don't look back. Just look forward.
You are one of the lucky people who needed the surgery and was able to have
it. A new YOU is happening every minute of every new day.
— ChelleBelle
June 19, 2008
Hi Kili,
I know how you feel. I spent the first two and a half months after my
surgery feeling just like that, but After three months it was great, I am
11 months out I have lost about 100 lbs and I would do it all again
tomorrow if I had too. So it will get better. Good luck and Hang in there
you will be so happy you had the surgery with in a few months.
— sunshineal68
July 15, 2008
I am almost three months out and there have been a few times I have felt
that way. It is normal I think for most of us. Because in your mind you
are looking at how you used to celebrate and enjoy life with lots of food.
Just hang in there and remember why you did it and look at where it will
take you. At almost three months post op I am down 48 pounds with 37 to go
(total loss of 78) and I see the light at the end of the tunnel wouldn't
turn back for anything!
— Melanie C.
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