Question:
I am getting VERY scared!!

ok..I am having RNY on Jan 5th. This is something I have prayed about for at least 7 years. God has opened every door for me to have this surgery, and after all this time of research and praying for it, I am now SO scared. I am so afraid of going under anesthesia and not waking up. I know if I dont do this surgery, I will die. Of all the complications of being Morbid obese. I guess because its only 33 days away, Im freaking out. Please some one tell me this is normal to be this scared. I want this surgery more than anything.    — jackie L. (posted on December 3, 2008)


December 3, 2008
It is normal to be scared if you have not had previous surgeries. I just had a revision to the RNY, on Nov. 20th, had knee surgery on Oct. 10th. Chemo in April - July. So, I can tell you it can be tricky... BUT you need to pray about it and let it go... I think your fear is the unknown. If you want you can email me anytime... Monica Hayman I am in Texas and on the website.
   — MonHay

December 3, 2008
Being scared and second guessing your decision is normal. Pray for strength and healing. My surgery was 11/3/08 and I cannot believe how much better I feel. No more Blood pressure medication and all my labs came back within normal limits. I am early in this journey, but I am so glad I completed the process and on my way to healthy living. Please go to a local support group even before your surgery. It will confirm your decision to make this lifestyle change. Best of luck to you and I will pray for you too.
   — DeniseHolstege

December 3, 2008
Greetings, Jackie: You have prayed for 7 years to have this surgery. You know that if you do not have this surgery, you believe you will die. What you need to ask yourself is this question: who is making you afraid and scared of having this surgery? In your own words, you tell us that God has opened every door for you to have this surgery. So, who are you listening to? Notice that I did not capitalize the word "who." You are in my prayers. May the Peace of Christ be with you in all ways. Rest in Him and read and pray Scripture, believing in His Word. You are in my prayers. Blessings, Christine Gibson, OH Coach and WLS Support Group Leader.
   — Christine Gibson

December 3, 2008
Dear Jackie, Please know that God has heard your prayers and silent unspoken thoughts. Please reread exactly what you wrote. God has opened every door for you to have this surgery,You have all the faith in HIM and now you need to stop second guessing yourself. You run a greater chance of more serious complications not having the surgery than you do having it. STOP,TAKE A DEEP BREATH, EXHALE,raise your head to the HEAVENS above and BELIEVE that you will be in Gods Hands. There is NO SAFER PLACE!!! Yes it is normal to be scared,man leary,God fearing. Be proud of yourself,look forward to an entirely new begining. God Bless You!!! Your"e gonna be just fine!!!!!!LOL!!!
   — kurtsgirl

December 3, 2008
I went through the whole battery of emotions before surgery - we all do. I waited over 3+ years and was denied once in the process and finally had LAP RNY on 2/15/07 - on my mom's b-day (2/15). It was a special day so I knew it would be OK in the end. Did I FREAK out before hand? Sure. Did I go through with it? Sure did. Would I do it again? In a heart beat. Good luck. I will pray for you. Count your blessings, take a deep breath and jump onto the loser's bench with the rest of us. Blessings. JC
   — jammerz

December 3, 2008
Jackie, The above answers are truly from God. I was where you were during my first month after signing up, but then I decided if God brought me to this surgery, and I was convinced he did, then it was time for me to be his good daughter and trust Him with my life. I did, and he did great? lol, I had no problems and He helped me every step of the way in the past 6 months and he has promised to keep on keeping on. He will see me at the end of time and will say, thanks for the trust, my little girl! (and I will be!,, little that is. Lyn)
   — SkinnyLynni2B

December 3, 2008
You think you are scared now ... wait till the night before and the morning of ... Not to make it worse ... just prepare yourself. I was so scared ... could not hardly talk the morning of ... just wanted to cry. I felt so ashamed for letting myself get into such bad shape that I had to do "this"!!! But now almost 8 month post-op and minus 140 lbs I have to say I am so glad I had it done ... wish I had been brave enough to do it years earlier. I can also honestly say I was never in any pain after surgery. Sore and swollen ... very tired from the medicine they gave me to put me to sleep. One thing I suggest is getting the cream medicine you rub onto your wrist that stops nasea (sp???) - upset stomach. I had some on hand and had to use it twice. No big deal ... just woke up twice with a bad stomach ache ... kind of like I had eaten something and it did not sit well on my stomach and wanted to come right back up. Well that was the last thing I wanted anything to do ... was come back up. Both times this happened in the middle of the night. Rubbed the cream on and went back to sleep and never had a problem ... never vomited. Good luck and stay strong!!! Check out my profile to if you want.
   — Tammy Cardwell

December 3, 2008
Hi Jackie. As a recent RNY patient in August 2008, I was a little scared too, but I had many friends who prayed for me and well as my own prayers. I can't believe how smoothly everything has gone. It was like flawless. I could tell the Lord was watching over me and keeping me in his care. He will do the same for you, and you know that or you wouldn't have prayed for 7 years. "Though will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on me" Good luck hon, you can do it. Just reach out and the help is there.
   — katiecakes

December 3, 2008
I totally understand how you feel. I am in the exact same position. I am scheduled for surgery December 23rd. I do believe God has opened these doors for me. I had orientation on September 11, and having surgery 3 months later. This is something I have been wanting for a while. I have read all your responses and they are right- That is exactly what the holy spirit has been telling me. Read the scriptures, mediate on me vs. my situation and I will walk you through it, have a good support group (which I have limited who I am telling , even people in the church, because not everyone is for you, I have selected a few intercessors) and a few friends, and this board. I really don't feel I have to explain to anyone for a 1/2 hour why I want and NEED this surgery. And I keep confessing, God you are for me, God you have great plans, and confessing that my surgery will go well and fast recovering. Have I arrived - no? Am I still fearful - Yes? but I still confessing, and taking one day at a time. Keep me in prayer as I keep you.
   — Carmen C.

December 3, 2008
Hi Jackie I understand you completely. My surgery is Decmeber 9th, and I am going crazy. I'm not sleeping, I'm moody(well, I am always moody), I cry at the drop of a pin, I even updated my will. I know deep in my heart that God WILL watch over me and if it's my time, and I'll go with or without the surgery. But right now my fear totally out weighs my common sense. My local support group has been a tremendous amount of help. They have wonderful advice and encouraging success stories, not to mention all the shoulders to cry on. So in the end, BE NERVOUS, this IS a very important lifestyle change, but it's because of our OLD lifestyle that we need the CHANGE! I will add you to my prayers!
   — Fircrkr64

December 3, 2008
Jackie, my dear ... I hate to tell you this, but you are extremely normal -- and I'd be more worried about you if you WEREN'T scared. All of us who are on the "other side" have been there, done that, and own shares in the t-shirt concession. In my case, I had my surgery 18 days after my initial consult with the surgeon -- he'd just been granted more OR time -- so I didn't really have a lot of time to be scared, but I still managed to tie myself up in knots. And, of course, even just 18 days is long enough for every Negative Nelly in three counties to show up and tell you about their hairdresser's cousin's third wife's ex-sister-in-law's manicurist who had the surgery and DIED, or how someone else had the surgery, lost a million pounds and then gained back a million and five -- in two years -- or how yet another somebody had it and it didn't work but they ended up with severe anemia and malnutrition and yadda, yadda, yadda. If God's opened every door for you to have this surgery, He's still in control -- and He's watching out for you and making sure that no matter what happens it will be okay. Trust that, and hang on to it. On the other hand, be joyful -- for you're now only 33 days away from your brand new life. Blessings and prayers,
   — Cheryl Denomy

December 3, 2008
If God brought you TO it, he'll bring you THROUGH it!! Don't lose your faith.
   — [Deactivated Member]

December 3, 2008
yes, everything is normal. i even went as far to tell my adult kids that if anything happen to me, i was doing what i wanted for me, to be healthy, to enjoy my life. i knew in my heart, God had me in his hands. i just wasn't sure of Gods over-all plan. right now he has given me what it takes to control my bad habits. i haven't had any candy since 09-08 no junk food at all. i do crave salt from day to day, and will cheat by having a cracker. i know that i have gotten to feel alot better, and can go more. i have lost 68 lbs now and get very excited. you have prayed so long now and know that you need this to survive. if God has open the doors, then i would think he was telling you, that you will be fine. doesn't mean you may or may not go through alittle rough time, we all do. good luck and keep those prayers going....... and i will too.
   — peggy R.

December 3, 2008
Jackie, first I want to say...CONGRATULATIONS on your upcoming surgery! As you said, you have prayed for this for seven years. God has answered your prayers, in His time. It is completely normal to be scared! You are undergoing major surgery. Yes, there is a possibility that you won't wake up, that is the fact. However, would you rather kill yourself slowly over the next years?? The one thing that I would say is that you need to make sure that you have a "Power of Attorney", just in case something goes wrong in the hospital and you are unable to make decisions for yourself. Also, make sure that you have an up to date will. That way, you know that you are prepared for anything. Nothing worse than going into hospital, knowing that you havent' gotten your affairs in order. You will be fine, as long as your surgeon is professional and well-practiced in this surgery. I'm sure that you have researched him/her before taking this leap of faith. Please remember that you are doing this to improve your health and that this is your decision. You are still able to change your mind right up to before they put you "out". This is YOUR choice. Just remember that this is life-saving surgery. Just relax and know that you are in His hands, always. Good luck to you!
   — anitak

December 3, 2008
I am there with you. Mine is scheduled for December 29th and I am freaking out. I am so excited but at the same time kinda scared. I just keep trying to think of all the positive things that will come from this.
   — Rhondafay

December 4, 2008
Jackie, it is normal to be scared before any type of surgery. In the early 80's I was scheduled for surgery. During the attempt to put me under, I literally stopped breathing and had clinically died. The cause of it was my asthma. I had a severe asthma attack at the same time. It took over almost 10 minutes to bring me back. I believe that it was not my time to go and that there was a greater plan for me later in life. I am not telling you this to scare you even more but rather to let you know that I did successfully have that surgery several months later and since then have had 3 more (one was for my lap band surgery). Please do not back out of your surgery. This is probably the most important step of your life. Discuss this concern with your doctor. Your doctor will be able to assure you that everything will be done to see that you have a successful surgery. For me, my lap band was a better solution. I had my surgery at the end of January '08 and have lost over 70 lbs. My life has changed dramtically. Do not lose your resolve to have this surgery. I know that you will do well.
   — shirl45

December 4, 2008
Hi, Jacjie. I too am scheduled for surgery on Jan.5 at 10.30. I know exactly how you feel. All the responses above are exactly right-we have waited and prayed for this opportunity to be healthy,God won't let us down now. We can pray for each other on the 5th. I'll be looking for your posts on the loser side.God Bless you! Donna
   — donna.williams

December 4, 2008
I too was very nervous before my surgery on 11-13-08. On the way to the hospital, the Lord brought back this scripture to my mind that my sister had read at our Harvest Festival at church. I looked it up in my Bible on the way to the hospital and wrote it down and held on to it the whole time. I woke up in the recovery room with it still in my hand. The scripture is Joshua 1:9 "Have not I commanded thee; be strong and of good courage. Do not be afraid neither be thou dismayed, for the LORD thy God is with the withersoever thou goest." Just keep your faith and HE will see you through. Teresa Y.
   — tyrn04

December 4, 2008
Jackie, we all have been there and it is very normal to be scared. I went to so many extremes before my surgery (3 yrs Post-Op). You are going to do fine. What hospital are you having it done at ? Please keep me posted and if you have any questions, please feel free to contact me
   — JuliBlu

December 4, 2008
you said yourself that god has opened every door for you to have this surgery and you have been praying for this .. so remember what it says in 2 timothy 1 :7 God has not given us a sprit of FEAR,but of Power love and of sound mind. You keep that in your thought and know he is in control and he will direct your steps. may new journey be all you are praying for .. God bless you.. Suzanne
   — plumadore68

December 4, 2008
I had my surgery 10/15/08 and trust me I felt the same way... 30mins before I broke down and began crying hysterically. "I dont want the surgery and I was going home." and then my husband who disagreed with me having the surgery handed me an envelope. in it was a letter to my daughter who was at the time 21 months old. I had left it on the desktop of our computer and never told him about it. he said. I love you so much I will never let her forget her mother and how brave she was to have this surgery.... It is hard, and will be for awhile, but so worth. Im 7wks out and 50lbs. down and am able to be a wife to my husband and a mother to that little girl I was so afraid of leaving behind. you will be fine too...
   — leila92399

December 4, 2008
Jackie, I was the same as you! GOD will protect you. Read the boards, feel assured things will go right! Bless you...hang in there.Hugs, Michele
   — Supermom2008

December 4, 2008
I am the poster child for being scared before surgery. I was so close to bailing out just hours before. I am 9 months post op and my daughter was 2 at the time. I was so afraid of leaving her and her never knowing me. At the same time I knew if I didn't have the surgery that I was risking that anyway. If is TOTALLY normal to feel scared and having thoughts of bailing out on the surgery. Believe me!!!!!!! You should visit my page and read my posts from right before surgery. But I'll tell you what, freakin out like I did before surgery is the only regret that I have. It was also the hardest part of the whole process!! BUt it is ALL worth it. I have lost 113 lb and I feel FANTASTIC!!!! I have never felt so good about my myself inside and out. You can do this!!!!!!!!!!!!! God Bless and Congratulations on your decision to make your life better in so many ways. Angie Kimball (sillyguts)
   — Sillyguts

December 8, 2008
Hi, You asked God for help and now he giving you what you asked for. Fear is the opposite of FAITH. Do you trust your doctor? This is not a new surgery, they perform hundreds of these each year. Please change your attitude and be grateful for this opportunity to SAVE your life. I am having my surgery this Thursday, 12/11 and I can't wait. I know that everything is going to be fine. I am going to do everything they tell me and I am going to be at my goal weight within the year. I currently weigh 230 and my goal weight is 115. I am 5' 3" and 53 yrs old. Something I just started is writing in a journal in the morning. That really helps me. I write 5 things I am grateful for everyday. This reminds me how blessed I am. God is good. Peace & blessings, Bigg Sister
   — BBBigSister

December 8, 2008
I think it is perfectly normal to be scared. I just had surgery on dec 4th and thankfully i wasnt worried even a little i think my wife did that for me lol. The one thing that is for sure when you wake up your new journey has begun. then everything gets exciting.
   — webuzby

December 21, 2008
Hi there. Merry Christmas! You said God has opened every door for you to have surgery, so just pray and ask the Lord for His peace. Fear is not from the Lord. He'll give you the peace you need. God Bless you!
   — Maranathas

December 23, 2008
Jackie, God is answering your prayers and you just need to be thankful for it. Yes, it is normal to be scared; however, morbid obesity is within itself a sure death sentence. I had reached a point in my life, on so much medications and the side effects from all those BP meds slow down the heart, and that makes one feel so tired & sluggish, that I decided I'd rather die than spend the rest of my life as I was. Just pray and have faith that you will be fine throughout the surgery. The word of God tells us we must first see it, speak it and have faith that it will come to pass. Relax, being under anesthesia is the best sleep you'll ever experience. To date, I've had 9 different surgeries and have not experienced anything bad during the surgery.Good luck and please feel free to contact me. Cheryle
   — amistique569




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