Question:
Is anyone embarassed by people noticing the SLOW weight loss?
I didn't tell alot of people about my WLS 6 months ago, but, somehow everyone I know seemed to find out about it. I haven't lost any weight in the last 6 weeks and everyone seems to ask "so, how much weight have you lost now?" and the answer is the same that it was almost 2 months ago. I thought that I would lose 80-100 lbs in 6 months, and now I know that was unrealistic, but I've only lost about 55-60 lbs in 6 months and I guess everyone (including me) was expecting me to look like Carnie Wilson OVERNIGHT. I feel so embarassed when someone I didn't even tell about the surgery asks pointedly about my weight loss, and I want to lie and say a number that's not true. Does anyone else have this problem? — Jennifer C (posted on September 8, 2002)
September 8, 2002
Did you measure yourself? When on plateaus dimensions drop big time. Say I
am on a plateau, but have lost X inches. Or my clothing size gas dropped X
times, Lots of ways to tell trhe truth without lying. Besides everyone
plateaus its normal and to be exppected.
— bob-haller
September 8, 2002
You shouldn't feel embarassed... Try this... forget about all the outside
influences around you... Focus on your accomplishments... You have lost
almost 10 pounds a month for the past 6 months... you are eating better
foods... and your energy level should be building... One thing I have
learned through this journey is ... You can always find people that will
try to tear you down but not nearly as many around when you need to be
built up... Go at your own pace... your body is telling you a 'slower' pace
is better for YOU... Go with the flow.... Keep your head up...
— California J.
September 8, 2002
Yes! I have only lost 40 lbs in 10 months!!!! My surgeon now admits my tool
is not functioning properly! I can eat almost the same volume of food post
op that I could eat before surgery! EMBARRASSED, yes I should not feel
that way but i do. People also note the volume of food I can consume at
meal time. I'm greatful for the 40 lbs I no longer take hypertension
medication, my arthritis no longer bothers me but I am still 90 lbs over
weight! still obese. People tilt their head and say "is this how it
is supposed to work? Its almost humerous to me now because if there is a 1
in a 500 chance I am always that one! (smile) The most embarassing comment
is "have you worn that small dress you bought before your surger yet?
(sure its a size 10 and I wear it on my big toe :))
— Dee H.
September 8, 2002
Jennifer, I think you are doing fabulous, keep up the good work. I am a
slow loser also, but beleive it or not in time it will come off. Stay
possitive.
— Deanna Wise
September 8, 2002
You know, this type of thing really burns me up!! Why is it people are SO
concerned with our weight?? Have they nothing better to do or think about?
I dread telling some of the people I work with that I am having this
surgery. I've already decided that I am going to tell them right up front
that I absolutely do NOT want anyone asking me how much I've lost. If I
decide to share that, then I will. I do not want to be quizzed on a weekly
basis and then be judged. There are people who are going to find negative
things to say either way. If you lose too much, then they'll say that's
unhealthy. If you don't lose enough, then there must be something wrong
with you. Please ignore these people for they obviously have no life of
their own or are not very happy with the one they have. You're doing great
and if it's slow, it's slow. Look at it this way, it's less than you had
before.
— Kathy S.
September 8, 2002
I agree 100% with the previous responses. When was the last time you ever
lost 50+ pounds, let alone in *6* months!!!
— Marti R.
September 8, 2002
Jennifer, I just HAD to write to you to answer this question. Hon, you
stand up proud of those pounds that you lost. First of all, it's NO ONE's
business unless you make it so. Secondly, losing slowly, you will most
likely NOT end up with the shapai legs that I have. Maybe you won't get
the flappy arms that I have. Maybe you will not have the droopy boobs!
You don't want to lose fast although I know in your heart you do. Your
friends and family are never gonna be happy anyway. First I was too heavy.
Okay so I had surgery...then I was losing too fast...then I was too skinny
and should gain weight. It's a never ending battle hon and the only person
you need to please is YOU. Don't fight the small wars...just tell them
that you are continuously losing and until you are comfortable, you don't
want to discuss pounds. I wish you all the luck and love in the world.
Barb
— Barbara H.
September 8, 2002
I chose not to tell anyone about my surgery. This presented a similar, but
different problem. I lost weight really really fast. Because I was keeping
my WLS a secret, I did not want people to know the actual number, because
it was totally unrealistic to think someone could lose that much weight in
the short time that I did! So, I came up with an answer that I was and
still am completely comfortable with. When asked the "how much weight
have you lost?" question, my answer has ALWAYS been "a lot".
It would really take someone with a lot of guts to ask the follow-up and
insist on an actual number. No one has EVER done that and it's been 20
months for me. In fact yesterday I was told how great I looked and a very
sweet friend leaned over and very privately asked me that question. My
response was to smile very sweetly and say "a lot". That put an
end to the nosey questions. I guess also in a very warped way, I don't want
to say the actual number because then people will actually know how big I
was (as if they couldn't just LOOK at me then and tell???) I did have a
dear sweet lady at church ask me and I gave her my answer. I think this
shook her up a bit because her follow up to that question was "well
how much do you weigh?" I said," well, Barb, my husband doesn't
even know how much I weigh!" and then chuckled. You don't have to give
anyone a specific number. That is totally up to you. Shelley
— Shelley.
February 3, 2003
I'm almost 8 months post op and haven't lost a single pound in over 2
months. I've only lost 65 lbs and people are starting to wonder what's
wrong. Have you had any suggestions? Carb blockers, fat burners, etc.
— braesgran
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