An honest answer like the others

Hi there! Guess I am the lady that used to write on here and had regrets...Sweetie, yes I had serious regrets when I first came out of surgery for about 6 weeks. I missed food, hated the regimen and hated exercise along with having to deal with the after effects of the surgery. After about 6 weeks things got alot better for me and I loved every single comment that I got about getting smaller. That went on for about 8 months until I started feeling bad again. After about 10 months since surgery, I noticed that I was much weaker than I used to be and wasn't feeling terribly well. Found out that I had a vitamin deficiency which was very bad. I didn't have one good day for about 3 months. I had leg pain, stomach pain, and weakness generally. After getting back on track vitaminwise, things are starting to look up again. I still don't feel that great but now I am only dealing with a severe Iron deficiency and that makes me tired all the time. Yes, I am down to goal weight and actually far surpassed that. I had a pshychological problem dealing with that too. After every telling me a year ago how pretty I was and that I just needed to lose weight, well, I did. Then people were telling me that I lost too much and that I needed to gain. It's honestly very damaging to your mind at times. You tend to think "gee, when WILL I look good to people"? I have since, listened to Michelle Curan and believe that soon, I will again like the person inside here. I was scared at one time because I couldn't seem to stop losing. This, like she said, has since stopped and I have stablized at 120. (I got down to 110 at 5'3) I have to tell you this...at this point, I would definately do it again BUT, it WILL NOT solve all your problems. There always seem to be new problems to solve in my mind hon. On one hand, I love people calling me tiny, and on the other hand I hate the lose skin which prevents me from wearing shorts and such. I honestly just don't think I will ever be truly happy with how I look. But, that's just ME. So many people on here are happy and we are ALL much healthier for doing this. I am hoping that my strength comes back and I am looking forward to that day. As for 99% of us being happy well, we have all probably had a regret or two but the end result is that most of us are healthier and look better in the end. That's not to say that there are not mountains to climb here, just that we now have all the equipment and can climb them. Some of us make it to the top, and some of us make it half way up. But all of us can be proud that we tried and made it some of the way up there. Without the surgery, we would still be looking up and wondering what it was like to climb. Now I know and have been on both sides of it. I like the top better and I have such an empathy for the people who are still waiting. I get so mad at people now who make fun of large people or who have no concern for them or understanding. I work at a restaurant and "went off" on a hostess who sat an obviously 400 lb.+ woman at a booth. She couldn't even fit in. I felt so sorry for her and told the hostess to NEVER embarrass a customer that way again. Regrets? No. Some problems? Yes. Would I do it all over again? Sure I would.

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