I want to be a BIG loser, but I'm just a PLAIN loser...

11/15/01- 187lbs- I think this may be my end weight? I had my surgery on 8/25/2000 and I probably could stand to lose another 30-40, but I hate exercise, I hate sweating and until I come to terms with that, I will not lose another pound! Someone wrote on this site they were happy being in the 180's, feeling "normal" or "rubenesque" and never dieting etc. and I am trying to accept that for me, but I don't. I WANT to weigh 150, but I am one lazy, unmotivated girl. I feel as I am the WLS failure. I didn't use my "window" of opportunity to learn to like to exercise like the rest and now I'm screwed.... I also get panicky about gaining it back- which I haven't- but still- I am paranoid. I have been TRYING to get to a support meeting I was invited to- but it is the second Saturday of each month- and I play on the weekends! I bet there is someone else out there just like me- I wonder what they've done....anyone else come back from a "point of no return" or so they thought?

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