Hai rloss... STILL. Depressed. Weight gain. Losing my mind.

Hi all. I can't believe I found this site. I'm at a total loss. I am frightened of what's going on with my body, and doctors can't seem to pinpoint what's wrong. I had a VBG in 1996. Before the VBG, I ate horribly and I didn't exercise. I was 330lbs. I lost 95lbs. in the first year. Then the weight loss simply stopped. I exercised... a lot. I was very careful about what I ate and probably consumed no more than 1000 calories a day. Through exercise alone, I lost an additional 25lbs. during the next year. The hardest 25 lbs. ever. And that stopped. Meanwhile, I was slowly losing my hair. Looking back, it's hard to tell when the hair loss started. I thought I noticed some loss when I was 21. But it didn't become really noticeable until a few years ago. But I was still able to go to the hairdresser and disguise the thinning parts. Now, the situation is horrible. Beyond my worst nightmares. First of all, I got pregnant when I weighed about 220. I gained 45 lbs with the pregnancy. My hair was wonderful during pregnancy. It stopped coming out. I wasn't finding clumps of it all over me. 3 months post-partum, it came out again, which I know is normal. That slowed. But since Nov 2000, it has picked up worse than I can ever remember. I am only 28. I've gone to endocrinologists (it's not htyroid... it's not hormonal). I've gone to dermatologists. They did a scalp biopsy and said it was genetic. Even as I write this at 1:00 am, I see hair all over my shoulders from falling out. Anyway, I have always told all the doctors about the VBg and asked whetehr this has to do with it. Everyone says no. I know that can't be. But my degree of loss is extreme. I need a wig now, and I don't know what I'll look like in 10 or 20 years. It's bad enough being fat, but now I am bald. I am suicidal. I am so upet, and I have nowhere to turn. I moved to a new place 2 years ago, and i don't know anyone. The doctors think I am nuts. I went to the ER a month ago with chest pains, and all the dr. could comment on was my hair loss. Meanwhile, I lost 20 lbs. right after giving brth, but I can't lose one more pound. Not one. I have stayed at 243 for 15 months now. I exercise rigorously 3x a week. I can eat a lot more now. i suspect my staple line ruptured. In fact, I called the office where the VBG was doen, and they told me they found that 40% of the VBGs they did ruptured during pregnancy, and they don't know why. Even though I can eat whatever now, I still try to watch it. Example: Today, I had a grilled chikend sandwich and a light salad with fat free dressing fro dinner. And I exercised. And just now, I got on the scale and saw I gained 3 lbs. HOW? Also, I always feel bloated now. I don't know if this is from the pregnancy and scar tissue combiend or what. Anyway, my hair loss continues to be excessive. I take a B-complex. I t get B-12 shots (they found I was deficient in B-12 after I asked what vitamins would have problems being absorbed if there were scar tissue. Sure enough, I was deficient in B-12). I take zinc daily. I take a multivitamin. There are 80-year old men who have mroe hair than me. It's stupid to be so vain, but I am so despondent about how out of control I feel. And again, doctors have no answers for me. I really, really, really think the surgery has a lot to do with the hair loss, but why now, after 4 years, has it picked up so suddenly? Is there any vitamin I am missing? Does this sound fmailir to anyone? Any ideas? And any ideas why I can't lose one mroe pound? As bad as my metablism was before pregnancy, it is worse now. And it is nice to hear success stories, but I am so jealous of women who lose 50 lbs. post-op in 2 months. It took me 6 months to lose 50 lbs... and that was with surgery. That's the amount of time most people can lose it on a diet without surgery. Why is my body so screwed up? I just want to lay down in a ditch and die sometimes. That's horrible, but it is the turth. That's why, instead of sleeping, I am here posting this. I can't sleep. I am too upset. Please post your advice. I appreicate it. Thanks for reading this far.

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