Few comorbidities, no supervised diets, and psych issues... should I bother trying?

Sorry this is REALLY long... I've been very excited about the option of weight loss surgery as a real potential aid in my hope to lose weight rather than just something "crazy celebrities" do ;) since a friend of mine (online friend, lives far away unfortunately) had the surgery two years ago. I spent a lot of time reading about the different forms of surgery, read some great success stories, some not so great stories, etc. I set up an appointment to meet with my PCP on March 27th to talk about WLS (as well as have an annual physical). Now I'm reading more about qualifying for surgery, and I'm worried I won't qualify. I know I've seen people say any of the things I mention have applied to them and been approved, but I worry all of them together will be too much. 1. I have few co-morbidities. I had a 2-month period of documented high blood pressure (a year ago), but after a slight weight loss (250 to 230 - I'm 5'0) achieved solely through eating less and exercising more, it resolved itself. Half that weight has come back, but the BP has been normal (although on the "high side" of normal - usually around 110-120/80-85 - the highest they recorded last year was 140/100) since. Not sure if I can even claim hypertension,then. I have problems with incontinence, but not to the extent mentioned on this site - I'll have to go frequently (every other hour+, can barely squeak by for 3.5 hours while at work), and it comes on suddenly and intensely (I have wet myself once because I decided to ignore one of these times for the 10 minutes it would take to talk home from work - I nearly died of embarassment and no one knew!). I do not get much exercise, but I am able to do a job that requires me to stand either in one place or running around (I'm a cashier & cahsier supervisor at a busy store) for 7 hours without a break, although by the end I'm in pain if I haven't had a chance to sit down at some point in the middle. I have had problems conceiving: long cycles, sometimes irregular, etc. But otherwise, I'm healthy so far. My main reason for wanting this surgery is because of that "for now." I know realistically that I'm 28 years old, and not going to lose weight on my own. It's only going to get worse - the weight AND the medical issues that go along with it. I have a 4 year old and a husband, neither of whom I want to leave anytime soon, and that's my biggest fear - I'll have a heart attack by the time I'm 35. It seems insane to make me wait until my body falls apart before doing something to reverse those issues, when I could do this now and prevent them. Anyhow, on to number 2: No doctor supervised diets. The longest I ever did at eating "reasonably" was the 4 month stint to lose 20 pounds last year - and honestly, the only thing that kept me going was the carrot dangled in front of my head... both that if I was 27 and having high blood pressure, death by heart disease was pretty much a given, and I wanted to delay that. But even more was that I could not get back to trying to conceive (doctor assisted, using Clomid at that point) until I'd lost the weight and the BP stabalized. Other than that, I've never lasted more than 2 weeks on a modified eating plan. I see myself as a food addict, where if I start eating something yummy but not good for me, I can't stop. And going cold turkey hasn't worked... I mean, if I were an alcoholic, I could avoid MOST situations where I would be expected to drink (and rely on willpower and resolve for the times I was), but food is such an essential part of our lives and in this culture, one cannot avoid junk food most of the time. This is why I'm looking at RNY surgery - I WANT the dumping syndrome as an extra slap of the wrist if I slide off the wagon (because I know at some point I will, the question is whether it is simply having a couple cookies or going on a binge), and the restricted stomach size to help get over the feeling of never being full until I've gorged myself (I figure my stomach has to be pretty large at this point). I do realize some of this is psychological, which is my part to work on, but I'm hoping the surgery would help with the phsyical. Anyhow, I never saw the point of Weight Watchers or the like - I know I could do it for the short term with much success, but I also know at the end I'd gain it back. I've watched both my parents and my father's relatives do this all my life. If I'd realized I would come to a point where going through all that first would have resulted in qualifying for surgery, I'd have done it, but now I dont' want to have to wait another year or two (how long do I have to go on then off to regain?) to prove it won't work. And, finally, probably the biggie: 3. Psych evaluation. I attempted suicide when I was 17, and went through an undiagnosed depression (looking back, how someone didn't ship me off to the shrink baffles my mind, guess my family didn't want to see the problem, and I left my friends before they would) in college. I also suffered form Post Partum Depression aftermy daughter was born, but that resolved itself within 6 months on Paxil. I worry because so many people mention "suicidal tendancies" as a reason for exclusion from the surgery, and worry that something I did 11 years ago will be my blacklisting. Now I consider myself normal - I have good days, bad days, but also have found outlets for those bad times, the big difference between then and now. So... I guess I'm terrified of what will happen. If they tell me I don't qualify for the one thing that I think could help me, I would be devestated (but not suicidal, mind you ;)! I have so much hope for this happening, but now I'm starting to doubt it will. Has ANYone had so many marks against them but been approved?? Thanks for reading this novel! Sorry again it was so long, can you tell I have a lot of questions? ;)

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