How do I let go?

I had wls on 7/17/01. My husband told me today that he no longer loves me the way he use to. Last Oct, my husband was ready to end our marriage but, has not done so for my sake. I used to be controlling w/ a sharp tongue. I have been to counseling and overcame these traits within myself. I have been with my husband for 14 yrs and have been married for 12 of those yrs. I havn't been able to have children of my own. I have been a stay at home (step) mom for almost 12 yrs. Since my son was 4. In my heart, I feel as if my step-son is my own child. His natural mother has never been in the picture much. I want to stay involved in my son's life. He just turned 16 and only has a couple of years til he graduates from highschool. My husband and I are amicable and are planning on staying together til after graduation. I know when we split up I will loose my entire world. My husband, my son, my home, and my identity. If it were my natural son and we divorced at least I would still see him on holidays and and he would come over occassionally and so forth. But as it is, with teenagers, he is already drifting to independence and has less time for parents. I already feel so lonely and my heart actually aches and feels a physical pain thinking of my future. My husband won't go to counseling, so that's not an option. Getting out and being around friends helps a bit, but it's not the same as family living together. I know I'll eventually have to but I don't know how in the world I can let go of the two people who are my world. God help me, I don't want to loose my family. And I don't want to become depressed. Has anyone had this type of situation soon after WLS and not had to be put on anti-depressants. ---At home and lonely

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