Getting scared as surgery gets closer and also from visiting memorial page!

As my surgery date is getting closer and closer for my Lap RYN, I am getting more afraid and starting to question if I am doing the right thing. I went to the memorial page on this site which was probably a mistake cause now I am even more afraid. I don't want to die! Is this normal to feel like this and what can I do to help not panic so much? I am really starting to think about not going through with this, can someone please help?

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