WLS Success-through Powerful Positive Attitudes
Need help for Whatachief!
My angelette Whatachief and I have been talking this morning and she's feeling really down and anxious...having that buyer's remorse. Could you guys please share how you felt like that and how long it was before you started feeling better. She needs to hear how she will feel better soon OK? Give her some positive vibes and reinforcement please. I know she'll be better soon but it would really help if she heard it from others. Thanks in advance!
hugs, Y
hugs, Y
Open RNY 3/30/01 260lbs - 130lbs 
Yvonne McCarthy, CLC. Health & Wellness Coach (full time volunteer). I am happy to help if I can. Visit www.bariatricgirl.com and see the Bariatric Girl blog! Also check out my Facebook Bariatric Girl Page. Photography site www.yvonnemccarthy.com .„ø¤º°¨ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ¨°º¤ø„¸¸„ø¤º°¨„ø¤º°¨ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ¨°º¤ø„¸¸„ø¤º°¨
But of course.... (warning: longer than usual... yikes!)
Dear Whatachief:
Well... I had done a lot of research before my surgery and had heard about "Buyer's Remorse" but was convinced I wasn't going to experience this because I KNEW ABOUT IT!
I Knew WHY I was having this surgery and I wanted to get healthy!
even so....
after surgery perhaps about a week or more out- I started to wonder...
especially since I was in pain...& when i got home from the hospital I was 18pounds heavier than when i went in!!!! so WHY did I have surgery??? I felt that I could have done it one more time "the hard way".... I felt like i took the easy way out.
I think this phenomena could be compared to post-partum depression.
WHAT? WHY?
Well- we hear about it.... we know it happens... it's a joyous occassion- nothing to be depressed about ... Yet women experience this... some to greater degrees than others....
BUT.... what about the outcome.... well.... you get yourself a sweet baby - or you have surgery and result is you get to be HEALTHY...
IT ISN'T EASY...
But it is worth it....
ENDURANCE... get past this tough part... and you will succeed.
Know that you may experience these feeling from time to time but it becomes easier to deal with as you see the weight falling off.
the weight will fall off... you will be able to drink more than A sip at a time.... just give it time.... hang in there WE ARE HERE FOR YOU!!!
littlethings made me happy.... watching my little birdie icon approach the first hurdle and fly over it..... look at my little birdie now...
Your icon will be over on the right side this time next year!!!
just think how happy you will be then!!!
keep in touch!!
-JUDY
Dear Whatachief:
Well... I had done a lot of research before my surgery and had heard about "Buyer's Remorse" but was convinced I wasn't going to experience this because I KNEW ABOUT IT!
I Knew WHY I was having this surgery and I wanted to get healthy!
even so....
after surgery perhaps about a week or more out- I started to wonder...
especially since I was in pain...& when i got home from the hospital I was 18pounds heavier than when i went in!!!! so WHY did I have surgery??? I felt that I could have done it one more time "the hard way".... I felt like i took the easy way out.
I think this phenomena could be compared to post-partum depression.
WHAT? WHY?
Well- we hear about it.... we know it happens... it's a joyous occassion- nothing to be depressed about ... Yet women experience this... some to greater degrees than others....
BUT.... what about the outcome.... well.... you get yourself a sweet baby - or you have surgery and result is you get to be HEALTHY...
IT ISN'T EASY...
But it is worth it....
ENDURANCE... get past this tough part... and you will succeed.
Know that you may experience these feeling from time to time but it becomes easier to deal with as you see the weight falling off.
the weight will fall off... you will be able to drink more than A sip at a time.... just give it time.... hang in there WE ARE HERE FOR YOU!!!
littlethings made me happy.... watching my little birdie icon approach the first hurdle and fly over it..... look at my little birdie now...
Your icon will be over on the right side this time next year!!!
just think how happy you will be then!!!
keep in touch!!
-JUDY
Hi Whatachief,
I totally understand about the buyers remorse..I had it about three weeks out of surgery. I didn't say anything to anyone about it..but I wish I had. I think you are brave for talking about it and letting us help you through it. When you can't eat regular food and you feel like your going to be sipping liquids for the rest of your days..and you can't imagine being able to go out to dinner with anyone ever again because you won't be able to eat anything..I have been there and done that and I am here to tell you..this too shall pass my dear. There are days when it is hard..but we knew this going into surgery..but most days are wonderful. Like when your clothes are not fitting for once because they are too big instead of too small...Or when you run into someone who has not seen you in a few months and they can't get over how good you look..or when you do something that you would not have done before surgery because you finally can or have the confidence to do so. It will become this way for you sooner then you think. I am 9 months out of surgery and I can't believe how much my life has changed in less then a year. I promise this will happen for you too. You just have to hang in there and know that you made a good decision for yourself. You will be healthier and happier and skinnier :) Plus you get to have a whole new wardrobe!!! Im such a girlie girl that the wardrobe part is so very much fun for me...I hope that you can find something that will thrill you just as much about your new live style. You will be able to eat semi normally again and drink more then just a sip and be in a group and have nobody know that you ever had surgery...they just know you look good :) I dont miss how greasy food made me feel..and I dont miss the junk..I dont miss the extra pounds and the guilt from being overweight. Just hang in there and know that you will get through this stage. Yvonne is right..whatever she says..shes right..lol...she has been around this much longer then I have..and look how good she is doing..someday you will be where she is and look back at this in disbelief. I will be praying for you..HUGS..Katie
I totally understand about the buyers remorse..I had it about three weeks out of surgery. I didn't say anything to anyone about it..but I wish I had. I think you are brave for talking about it and letting us help you through it. When you can't eat regular food and you feel like your going to be sipping liquids for the rest of your days..and you can't imagine being able to go out to dinner with anyone ever again because you won't be able to eat anything..I have been there and done that and I am here to tell you..this too shall pass my dear. There are days when it is hard..but we knew this going into surgery..but most days are wonderful. Like when your clothes are not fitting for once because they are too big instead of too small...Or when you run into someone who has not seen you in a few months and they can't get over how good you look..or when you do something that you would not have done before surgery because you finally can or have the confidence to do so. It will become this way for you sooner then you think. I am 9 months out of surgery and I can't believe how much my life has changed in less then a year. I promise this will happen for you too. You just have to hang in there and know that you made a good decision for yourself. You will be healthier and happier and skinnier :) Plus you get to have a whole new wardrobe!!! Im such a girlie girl that the wardrobe part is so very much fun for me...I hope that you can find something that will thrill you just as much about your new live style. You will be able to eat semi normally again and drink more then just a sip and be in a group and have nobody know that you ever had surgery...they just know you look good :) I dont miss how greasy food made me feel..and I dont miss the junk..I dont miss the extra pounds and the guilt from being overweight. Just hang in there and know that you will get through this stage. Yvonne is right..whatever she says..shes right..lol...she has been around this much longer then I have..and look how good she is doing..someday you will be where she is and look back at this in disbelief. I will be praying for you..HUGS..Katie
Adore Yourself!!!
Katie.... thanks for your words of support! You made some great points!
Before I lost the weight... I never would have even THOUGHT about going to have my Bra fitted properly by a professional! WHAT a treat that was. now... I can actually purchase some nice - matching sets... ooo laa laa....
Buyer's remorse can be tough to deal with if we go it alone.... so glad you shared your thoughts on overcoming it!
Judy
Before I lost the weight... I never would have even THOUGHT about going to have my Bra fitted properly by a professional! WHAT a treat that was. now... I can actually purchase some nice - matching sets... ooo laa laa....
Buyer's remorse can be tough to deal with if we go it alone.... so glad you shared your thoughts on overcoming it!
Judy Thank you for your kind words Katie. I know that helped her so much!
hugs, Y
hugs, Y
Open RNY 3/30/01 260lbs - 130lbs Yvonne McCarthy, CLC. Health & Wellness Coach (full time volunteer). I am happy to help if I can. Visit www.bariatricgirl.com and see the Bariatric Girl blog! Also check out my Facebook Bariatric Girl Page. Photography site www.yvonnemccarthy.com .„ø¤º°¨ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ¨°º¤ø„¸¸„ø¤º°¨„ø¤º°¨ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ¨°º¤ø„¸¸„ø¤º°¨
Whatachief-
I read this today and it made me smile so I wanted to pass it along to you:
This is my wish for you: Comfort on difficult days, smiles when sadness intrudes, rainbows to follow the clouds, laughter to kiss your lips, sunsets to warm your heart, hugs when spirits sag, beauty for your eyes to see, friendships to brighten your being, faith so that you can believe, confidence for when you doubt, courage to know yourself, patience to accept the truth, Love to complete your life. - Author Unknown
Know that I am here for you whenever you may need me! Read my email and please let me know how you are doing and if you would like to talk some more...
Today is a new day! :)
Trac~
I am a Bariatric patient/professional, an Obesity Help Support Group Leader and Certified Life Coach. I consider myself to be one of the biggest advocates for obesity in my community. My goal is to educate the public on obesity as a disease and give back to the bariatric community through my personal experiences and life coaching.
**Obesity Help Magazine Promotional offer.. Sign up for a 1-year subscription and receive a reduced rate of $15.95. Use code Baker11 at check out to receive your discount** Enjoy!!
[email protected] - Email
http://baribits.blogspot.com - Blog dedicated to weight loss patients!
I am a Bariatric patient/professional, an Obesity Help Support Group Leader and Certified Life Coach. I consider myself to be one of the biggest advocates for obesity in my community. My goal is to educate the public on obesity as a disease and give back to the bariatric community through my personal experiences and life coaching.
**Obesity Help Magazine Promotional offer.. Sign up for a 1-year subscription and receive a reduced rate of $15.95. Use code Baker11 at check out to receive your discount** Enjoy!!
[email protected] - Email
http://baribits.blogspot.com - Blog dedicated to weight loss patients!
Thanks for posting. I'm sure she will appreciate it.
hugs, Y
hugs, Y
Open RNY 3/30/01 260lbs - 130lbs Yvonne McCarthy, CLC. Health & Wellness Coach (full time volunteer). I am happy to help if I can. Visit www.bariatricgirl.com and see the Bariatric Girl blog! Also check out my Facebook Bariatric Girl Page. Photography site www.yvonnemccarthy.com .„ø¤º°¨ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ¨°º¤ø„¸¸„ø¤º°¨„ø¤º°¨ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ¨°º¤ø„¸¸„ø¤º°¨
Whatacief,
This is so normal. For the 1st 6 weeks I was dropping 5 pounds a day but I was so remorseful. Did I do the right? Why did I do this? I was grieving the loss of food. I had some bumps in the road as my surgeon told me not to worry. But to me he was crazy because I was like woe is me. What did I do??!!
No one could console me. And like one of the posters said I could not tell anyone because my family was not for me having the surgery anyways. They supported me but they were passive. I had other friends and family supporters, but not my immediate family. I knew my Mom was supportive but she did not want to go against my Dad -- who was dead set against it. So who could I talk to. No one because they would have said I told you so.
So I cried a many of days. I an emotional wreck and I was not in much pain physically. I was in emotional pain. I was going thru the motions but I was very depressed.
When it was time for me to go to work, and back out into the world, I realized-- I had lost weight. My clothes were already TOO BIG! When did I lose weight? I could not find anything to fit me right for work in just 2 months. That is when I came out of my FOG. That is when I realized I had did the right thing for me and a healthier life.
So Whatachief as many before me have stated this will pass. it is different for everyone but we mourn for a minute and then we have that moment we realize we did make the right decision. That the complications we had was worth the pain, it was worth the worry, IT was worth it. When you look back to these days you will wonder why you were so sad.
Just be patient, again this time will pass. I promise you it will. I like what JEllen said about post-parturm depression. It will pass and you will LOVE your new tool because it will help you reach for your dreams and meet your goals.
Your the best and hang in there. It is a moment and will pass as a twinkle in the night.
I am looking forward to hearing from you soon. Keep us posted.
Hugs,
Molly
This is so normal. For the 1st 6 weeks I was dropping 5 pounds a day but I was so remorseful. Did I do the right? Why did I do this? I was grieving the loss of food. I had some bumps in the road as my surgeon told me not to worry. But to me he was crazy because I was like woe is me. What did I do??!!
No one could console me. And like one of the posters said I could not tell anyone because my family was not for me having the surgery anyways. They supported me but they were passive. I had other friends and family supporters, but not my immediate family. I knew my Mom was supportive but she did not want to go against my Dad -- who was dead set against it. So who could I talk to. No one because they would have said I told you so.
So I cried a many of days. I an emotional wreck and I was not in much pain physically. I was in emotional pain. I was going thru the motions but I was very depressed.
When it was time for me to go to work, and back out into the world, I realized-- I had lost weight. My clothes were already TOO BIG! When did I lose weight? I could not find anything to fit me right for work in just 2 months. That is when I came out of my FOG. That is when I realized I had did the right thing for me and a healthier life.
So Whatachief as many before me have stated this will pass. it is different for everyone but we mourn for a minute and then we have that moment we realize we did make the right decision. That the complications we had was worth the pain, it was worth the worry, IT was worth it. When you look back to these days you will wonder why you were so sad.
Just be patient, again this time will pass. I promise you it will. I like what JEllen said about post-parturm depression. It will pass and you will LOVE your new tool because it will help you reach for your dreams and meet your goals.
Your the best and hang in there. It is a moment and will pass as a twinkle in the night.
I am looking forward to hearing from you soon. Keep us posted.
Hugs,
Molly
