Wow, what a week and some other stuff too.

I'm so tired that I can't even remember if I talked about this on another thread but on Monday my husband got up in a cold sweat, tingling and numb hands and arms.  His fingers were actually curling in.  Fortunately we live a couple of blocks away from the hospital.  He was so dehydrated that his potassium level had dropped to such a severe level that it was life threatening.  There's another long story regarding Ramon who's in the hospital too but among other problems, his vitamins are deficient too.  Now you'd think as many times as we've all talked about vitamins that Ramon would know better but I'm not going to beat him up while he's down.  Again....AGAIN....
again....do not get lax on your vitamins.
It will hurt you and it will hurt you more than you can realize when you start to lose your teeth and organs start shutting down. 

Subject number 2:
Since this forum is about being positive, I'm going to be as positive as I can be about this next subject.  I have been trying to deal with the general attitude that seems to be directed at anyone that does anything in the bariatric field and how they are treated on the boards. 

Let's start with why I do a blog.  I end up talking and emailing and PM'ing so many people that I repeat the same things hundreds of times so I decided to blog so that when I can, I can direct someone to a place where I've already written the answer.  It's also there in case someone might come across something they haven't learned yet.  I list my blog in my signature and occasionally when I do a blog post that I want to share, I copy and paste the entire thing into the post so that no one will accuse me of trying to get you to come to my blog.  I saw a lady that was inviting people to come to her blog and leave comments and someone actually complained to OH.  The other day I saw a post where someone was saying that there are bloggers that post under the disguise of "helping" but most of them don't really participate in the OH threads so somehow we are doing a terrible thing.  Oh..and some of them do shows and other things like that. To me it seems that  the more knowledge we spread the better.  Doing shows can be entertaining and informative.  Even if someone is selling bariatric products, it's like anyone that does that should be shot at sunrise.  Personally I believe that it's like being able to change the channel.  If you don't like it, don't look or don't buy.  Some of us are so passionate about this bariatric community that we live it 24/7.  I spend well over 40 hours a week doing volunteer stuff whether it's OH, you tube, The Weight Loss Surgery Channel, the group here, the Texas Board, the Main Board when I don't get so sad that I have to leave, The Feel Better Network where I volunteer for advice for mental health stuff plus the many phone calls, emails, PM's and posts. It seems some people complain that some people are trying to get rich off the WLS community.  As far as I know, no one with the exception of perhaps one lady that's been at it for a very long time is not only not getting rich but barely getting by on their efforts to help others.  I personally have spent more of my own money that anything I've made.  Even though I am a Certified Life Coach, I did that more to get more respect from the professionals because you are sometimes not given much credit if you have no credentials at all.  Again, all the phone calls I do for coaching have been totally free of charge.

Of course I cannot post this on any of the boards because I would get slaughtered but nothing would make me happier than for this mindset to change.  After all...if Eric Klein had never started a board, no one would be here at all.  Again..if you don't wish to read someone's blog, don't.  If you don't want to watch a show, don't...but chances are you will be missing out on some good stuff and the craziest part is that to watch these shows or read these blogs doesn't cost you a dime.

Oh and one last thing...there are many trolls that totally exist to try to drive traffic away from OH.  It's sort of a big hint when someone has no info on their profile, no pictures, no story and never anything nice to say.  It's also a big hint when they've just joined too.

If we don't figure out how to be kinder to each other, this will only get worse.Thanks for allowing me to get on my little soap box. I'm probably a bit raw after seeing my husband laying on a gurney in the hospital and wondering if he was going to make it out of there.  It just really hurts when someone says and thinks these things about people who ARE trying to help and as far as I can tell, our community needs all the good info it can get.  Staying in one place can make you stagnant and you can also end up picking up some bad habits just because some people will say the same things over and over whether they are correct or not.

Love you guys....thanks for listening.

Yvonne,

I hope everyone is on the mend.

Thank you for your post.  Sometimes I wish OH banned OT posts.  The political threads are so slanted it makes me sick.  One side will be polite while the other side believes in cannibalizing members in order to brow beat people into submission.  The outright filthy name calling is appalling. 

Hugs,

Chris

There is an actual OT forum but you know that doesn't work so well.  I've always said that there are certain things that should be not spoken about on support forums.  Politics and religion.  Now I don't mean that you shouldn't be kept from expressing your belief in the God of your understanding but things like politics, arguing about my God is better than your God and of course whether you are pro choice or pro life.  Each of us are set in our beliefs on those subjects and nothing you say will change the way I think or vice versa.  People don't realize how many people they alienate when they do that stuff. 

I put this somewhere in another post I think but I'll use the same analogy.  I will choose a bogus name so that no one thinks I'm pushing any particular agenda.  Let's say I make a statement like "President Flufferbutt is stupid".  If you voted for President Flufferbutt you are offended and therefore anything else this particular person says is not taken with as much credibility as before because you will remember that statement.  That person could be giving you the best WLS advice on earth but you will remember that particular statement.  When you make those statements you are also saying "I am right and anyone else that thinks differently is wrong".  If you wonder why we have lurkers??? There have been so many "I am right" statements made that some people are afraid to say anything because they are afraid they'll be jumped on when in reality we are here to love and support each other and CELEBRATE our differences. 

I have learned so many cool things about other cultures because of WLS because I have come in contact with people I may have never otherwise met.  Everyone has the right to believe as they wish but a support forum is not the place to argue things that will not change no matter how long we talk about it.  I personally don't have time to complain about things that I cannot change since this thing called a WLS journey is a big enough job already,(Insert serenity prayer here)   I try to be very careful when I give WLS advice to preface it with "this is what has worked for me". 

Thanks for being here Chris...I'm so glad you found us!
hugs, Y

Yvonne...

once again you are sooo right! the first time i encountered a lurker posing as a legit member I fell for it. Then another member caught onto the ploy and informed everyone. I learned to look for their tactics and actually identified one and called their bluff. Many were falling for  their stupid comments that just didn't add up to a legit member. Very sad that someone would do this.

Now- onto your week.  I can't imagine how exhausted you must be. I hope your husband is making good progress now and continues to feel better each day. I'm sure that had to be terrifying for both of you! Please take care of yourself and don't let the nonsense here get under your skin. You have more important things to deal with now....

{{{{{BIG HUGS}}}}}

Jude

Yes it is sad when they get pulled in on the game but hopefully more people will figure it out and the best part is that IT WON'T HAPPEN HERE!!!! WOOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I almost feel badly for my little speech but I did it and it's done.  You guys are my family.  Thanks for listening to me when I needed it.
love you guys, Y

Hello,
Hope your husband is getting better.  Thank you for your blog!  It is nice to see there are people *****ally do care, and are willing to help.  No name calling here.

Donna

Just love you Maw Maw...how could you not love someone with a user name Maw Maw!!
hugs, Y

Hey Yvonne!

So glad you were able to get care for your hubby right away.  I can't imagine how you were feeling.  And I know how dear Ramon is to you, too.  Hope all is well with both of them soon. 

As far as all the other stuff.  You get on that soap box anytime you want.  You know why I love you.

Take care,

Kathy

You are the sweetest person I know and I think your doing a great job. Let me tell you where I was at when I found this message board. I had done a lot of research about WLS and was working my way through all of the insurance hoops. But there was one thing that was really bothering me and that was would WLS surgery turn me into a mean spirited person. I was really beginning to worry about it because every time I would visit the other boards I would see someone slamming someone else.

It was a process to come to this decision to have WLS and I worry how many people *****ally need the surgery are turned off to it because of the negativity.

My momma always said if you didn't have something to say nice to someone don't say anything at all. That rule has worked pretty well through the years for me.

Thank You you so much, you are an inspiration to a bunch of people out there.