The New Year

Jackie was kind enough to reach out to me this morning to see why I hadn't posted anything to the group in a while and it prompted me to do so now.  I've had a challenging start to the New Year and rather than keep it to myself perhaps it is the whole point that I bring it to the group and get your insights and responses....as well as your own updates if you would like to share.

I was quite concerned with 'getting through' the holidays this year.  It was the second Christmas/New Years without my mother....and my marriage.  I missed the former....the latter only represents lingering sadness at having failed....and having lived with that relationship in the state it was and not had the fortitude to confront what was wrong.   I've been dating - so I had plenty of things to do....spent time with some very nice people....and filled time with some people who didn't really resonate with me.  I guess it's good I could tell the difference.

I had one really wonderful and cathartic experience.   My plastic surgeon had arranged a taping of some of his key patients for promotional purposes....and he asked me to be his 'massive weight loss' patient.  The producer of this video segment was a lovely woman - a breast cancer survivor - and she and I really hit it off.    She and I talked prior to the taping about my story.....and the end result is that they want to do something more intensive with the whole process.....I came away from it feeling very good about everything....and as always - very grateful for the changes in my life as a result of my WLS.

The day before I visited a friend I had not been in touch with in a number of years.   He was diagnosed with stage 4 colo-rectal cancer....and is gravely ill.   He's a wonderfully insightful and open person and we had a long afternoon having a very frank discussion about life...and death.....illness....dying.  I left in tears.....and have thought about him all weekend.  The contrast of his illness....and his struggle to maintain hope...in contrast to my own hardfought wellness.....has really struck a cord.    My own problems and struggles seem so petty in contrast.  Yet he wanted to talk about dating and the other life issues I'm dealing with.....because normalcy is something completely lacking in his own life.    Have so much to think about with all of this.

So....how did everybody do over the holidays.....and how are you feeling with the start of a New Year.  I look forward to hearing from you.     Susan

Hi Susan,
Happy New Year!
Sorry yours got off to a difficult start.
I was touched by the story of your friend.  It made me realize that all my whining about my plastic surgery complications is really ridiculous.  I should be focusing on more positive things and not the difficulties as none of mine are life threatening.....annoying yes, but they will heal and be forgotten in a few months.

Sometimes we need a hard dose of reality to put things back into proper prospective.

I hope things are calming down for you and I hope your friend is coping as best as possible.

Take care!
Ruth

Thanks for sharing, Susan, and sorry to hear about your friend. it seems there is more and more cancer out there.

I did terrible over the holidays: felt sorry for myself and tried to deal with it by eating and drinking. the best I can say is I didn't indulge in recreational shopping as well.

just this morning I was watching the weather channel and there were tons of commercials for all those poor souls out there who need to lose weight. nutrisystem (yucky food, tons of money) and so forth - I am so glad I don't need to worry about that any more.

my focus in the new year has to be on INCOME - mine has been below what I need for a long time and is only getting worse. that is my major source of stress and probably a big - the biggest - reason for my emotional eating over the holidays.

I will continue to work on the quality of my food: decrease coffee (doing well last few days) and increase produce, especially organic.