Tuesday, January 7, 2025

Hmmm, I've been considering starting Baby Reindeer. If you thought it was worth your time, I'd probably like it ...

Ditto what DD said. Especially after seeing one of the actresses on that show won the Golden Globe last night.

I will pass on Baby Reindeer - neither DH nor I like the weird stuff.

Liz, I hope DS was able to calm down and mend any fences he troubled while he was spinning. He seems like a person who feels deeply, which can be both lovely and disruptive, depending on which way the feelings are flowing. And your DD was 32 when she passed? Oh, that hits me hard. My DD is now 32. Hugs.

We arrived at the restaurant at 6pm, and stayed until 9pm. So much laughing. We met at a place that was owned by our mutual friend who passed away almost 2 years ago. His son is now in charge, and is the godson of my friend who we met up with.

So cold still. Not much to be done but stay indoors, and dress warm when we have to go out.

DH is out with his BFF. I think this is the first time I've been alone in the house since December 19. I like it! I love my family, but I'm happy to have alone time too. I never got to finish the New York Times on Sunday, so that's the plan for the evening.

Laugh as much as you can as often as you can! As you advised Peps, we need to enjoy life while we can because we never know what the future will bring.

DS saw a therapist when he was young (for anger issues at about age 8, then after his sister died). We were told that he feels love, happiness, anger, sadness, all emotions deeply. His biggest asset and his toughest (in the negative phases).

In the educational setting those like your DS are often referred to as "students/kids/children with BIG feelings". When I started teaching kids with big feelings were dismissed as trouble makers or whiners. Now it is a recognized character trait and there are all sorts of books and therapies to help teachers learn to deal with those students. It's amazing that there aren't the number of self help books available for the adults with big feelings.

Interesting that it is a recognized trait. DS (and us) were taught how to deal with his anger in a pretty effective way all those years ago. He was told to walk away from the situation and stay by himself using calming techniques until he felt like he could come out again. His parents (us) were taught to back away and not try to interact until he showed us he was ready. That sounds simple but DH's first response to DS's anger was to get in his face and tell him to calm down which of course incited him even more.

When we told the younger children that oldest DD had cancer but was 90% likely to be cured, he got angry and was screaming over and over "I don't like that 10%". He went into his bed and screamed and cried for a while with his blankets over his head. When he calmed down the first thing he did was to call his sister. It still chokes me up that somehow he sensed it was going to end the way it did 18 months later.

Yeah, "Calm down!" always works when someone says that to me. LOL!

Full disclosure: I've said it also with the same disappointing results.

Haven't we all!