Thoughts on this Analogy

I do love that analogy.

In any addictive behavior, I've seen most acknowledge that one manages it (and often can manage it quite well) but it doesn't disappear. I don't know any true recovering alcoholics, for example, that feel they can just go back to social drinking without because they're 'cured'. I'm not cured. And unfortunately unlike the alcoholic we can't avoid food completely. This means a lifetime of self-monitoring, much akin to the regular maintenance landscaping requires in your analogy.

One thing I have found is that doing some mental work on a peaceful acceptance of this fact has made a difference. In other words, rather than focusing on trying to cure my food issues, I work on understanding them AND accepting them. So I can then see my daily logging and weighing as something akin to showering, brushing my teeth, dusting the house, vacuuming now and then, weeding the garden - just a life necessity. In other words, I'm trying to remove the emotional baggage of it. I have never resented having to shower and brush my teeth. I don't spend much more time logging/tracking than I do on those, so why bother with resentment or angst about it?

Where is the "Like" Button?

I do like the analogy.  It works!

I am 45 and still have a lot to learn.... but having worked on this food addiction all my life, I can remember a time when I too thought or hoped that I too could understand it and fix it.  

I know for me, that is not possible.

As a matter of a fact, it is a part of me that I have come to accept.  I am okay with it, (now that I have my sleeve).   Often I think, there are worse things that I could be addicted to.

What continues to astound and amaze is how having the sleeve, the changing of my body, has allowed me to change my relationship with food.  It's not fixed, as I said.  I am still addicted to food, always will be however, I am less obsessed, less focused on food, less distracted by food, less haunted by food, and I've beaten back (not trimmed but beaten) the self hatred to a manageable level. That part has changed my life for the better.

So, I will continue to trim my hedges, pull the weeds, keep my garden neat and tidy and carry on.

Rob -- I love it!!!  And i'm a big navel-gazer too!  Your analogy is so clear.  I see the same thing with the root of the other psychological thngs that i have been in therapy for (for ages!).  And I work in  mental health non-profit, so the illness/functioning thing is never far from my mind.  i've worked with 2 therapists, both for an extended period of time.  my first one was a total navel-gazer and i loved working with her and basically luxuriating in my psyche (it was also helpful in some respects, but . . ).  i won't go into it, but that therapy came to a disasterous  end.  the therapist that i work with now has the absolutely opposite way of working:  okay, you have this illness, trauma, whatever.  how are you going to live with it.  it was a hard change at first, but has helped sooooo much!

Sorry to hijact your post!!!!  i will be saving it and coming back to it often!  ((((((((((hugs)))))))))

i do like the analogy. it reminds us that this is a lifelong living breathing process. It helps change the black/white thinking that we can sometimes get into when in fact we are dealing with a complex and many faceted issue. We are all living with a chronic disease but fortunately we have had an important treatment that enables us to deal with it very successfully and live a long and full life. When I feel resentful about being afflicted with the weight issue I remind myself that there are many many worse health conditions that I am lucky not to have and there are ways to work with this one every day.   Diane