My Desire Will Never FAIL -- Inspired By Lance Armstrong

The following is taken from www.amazingshrinkinggaz.co.uk/


Apologies RIGHT now if I ramble, I have quite a bit to cover today.

Last night I finished reading Lance Armstrong’s book “Its Not About The Bike"

It’s about Lance:

Not being a book reader I was a little concerned about actually finishing it, I need not have worried, the TV and my Xbox were put to one side for a week while each and every night I worked my way though it. It was compelling, funny, sad, inspiring and most of all BRUTIALLY HONEST !!!!

Until the start of the summer I knew little about Lance, I knew he was an American Tour De France winner who had cancer and was accused of doping, but that was it, Some said there was no more to know, I wasn’t so sure, over the summer I watched my first Tour De France and despite routing for Mark Cavendish at the start, As the tour went on Lance was winning my attention more and more each day, How could a 28 year old ALMOST get the yellow jersey after not racing for 3 years ? he was a smart rider, he knew what he needed to do to keep that 3rd place and the man won a lot more than just my respect.

When I picked up the book I wasn’t expecting much, so boy was I blown away by the honesty of the man, I am not ashamed to admit by the time I had finished I had a tear in my eye, I then jumped on Youtube and watched some videos of Lance tearing every apart.

It was my turn:

That was it I decided that in the morning (Today) I would give 200% and push everything I had in me to get a PB, I had an early night, I couldn’t sleep at first, I was rehearing every single corner in my mind, I wanted to be 100% ready, I woke up before my alarm clock, the pervious day had been chilly but with no wind or rain it was ideal, I looked out of my bedroom window and the rain was pouring down, there was a nasty wind circling too……..I said to myself “TODAY is the day, No matter what, you are going to TRY" I got my lycra pants ready and fuelled myself with a warm coffee and a red bull……..It was time.

Morning:

I stood outside in the pouring rain, I waited for 60 seconds to get used to it before getting on the Ribble, It was warmer than yesterday and the wind didn’t feel as bad as the bushes made it look, the rain was still throwing it down, I set off, I had removed my mud guards when I cleaned the bike and not gotten around to fitting them back on, I was soaked to the skin in under half a mile, but it didn’t matter, I was flying, it was wet, it was dark but still I was doing 27mph and felt comfortable, Devils Hill came and went and felt nothing more than a pothole, I was out of the saddle for what felt like 2 seconds and it was gone, I flew through Denton, holding 25Mph and getting a good break on the lights, Up the hill past Sainsbury’s doing 19Mph (normal 13Mph) and onto Hyde Road, I wasn’t tired, I wasn’t sore, I was like a machine, I was screaming to myself GO GO GO  every time a gap opened in the traffic nothing was gonna stop me I was stronger than I had EVER been before……………

Then DISTASTER hit……

There were 2 busses next to each other and 2 HGV’s in front of them, I could pass in the middle, on the left or the right, I was stuck crawling at 4 mph with the timer ticking , I lifted my front light to hit the wing mirrors in a vain attempt to get some space, it was another 3 mins before I got enough space. The damage was done, I knew I was behind, I put my head down and went like a lunatic, for the last mile or so holding 30 Mph, my legs felt like they had larva running down them, my lungs wanted to explode but I wasnt going to give up NO WAY, I pushed and pushed and pushed, “Today is the day" I kept saying, I arrived at work, SOAKING , unable to breath or sore, I looked at my cycle computer…..My PB Time was….18 Mins and 37 Seconds ( for 6.5 Miles) my Computer read 19 Mins 17 Seconds…….I was beside myself, 40 seconds…FORTY SECONDS…I had failed………

During the day I thought of why I had failed:

Was I not good enough ?

Had I lost fitness Bonk Training ?

Was it the conditions?

The Traffic ?

Me ?

The one single thing I didn’t question was my desire to WANT this, I sat there ANGRY at myself, then it became clear to me, STOP looking back, you have spent too many years looking back, look forward, the evening commute is harder, a lot harder, there is much more climbing, if I really had as much desire as I thought then why not aim for a “Total Day" PB, It would mean I was going into the hardest part 40 seconds down but if I WANTED it then I could do it !!!!

I spent most of the day working out where I needed to be by what time so that when I was on the road I could keep a constan****ch on how I was doing……Then for the last 2 hours of the day I regressed into myself, I became quiet, Just like last night I was once again riding all the corners in my mind………

Evening:

It was then time to put the plan into place and test my heart and desire, I sat on the bike for 30 seconds, gave myself a talking to and shot off like a ROCKET…..on the road where I leave work I normally do around 16Mph, to warm up, I was doing 22Mph, I ht the first set of lights, they were green, out of the saddle I got to ensure I didn’t get caught on a red, second set, same as before, third set, same as before.

I then went up the Debdale Incline (Jct Reddish) normally 12 Mph is my speed here, I knew I had to be better, MUCH better, I flew up at 17Mph, Soon I was heading to Denton Roundabout, The rain was coming down so hard I could just about see where I was going, I was transfixed on the road, I knew what it was like to be in the zone now, I was SMASHING the cranks like a jackhammer 22…24…27…29 Mph, I got to the roundabout, gulped down around 250mls of water and set off again.

No time for pictures of RLJ’ers tonight (sorry) I passed over the top of the M67, I was 55 Seconds ahead, WOW, I had made up the 40 seconds I started with and added another 55 seconds to it.

I got caught at Crown Point, setting off again I was hurting, I knew I had to hold 19 Mph to Devils Hill to not lose any of the time I built up…but I was in so much pain, I had gone too hard too fast too soon…….I looked at my cycle computer, 15Mph… NOOOOOOOOOO I shouted out, I managed to push up to 17.5Mph but that was it, I couldn’t go any faster.

Going down Devils Hill I was so tired that just holding onto the bars was an effort, I knew I couldn’t sprint Devils Hill but worked out I needed to hold 11 Mph, I did it…. JUST, I was into the final stretch, the last mile was a blur, I was hurting so much I think my mind had blanked it all out, I just got on with the task in hand….

Time to beat 46 Mins and 22 Seconds (13.3 Miles) …….

I looked down and raised my hands in triumph 46 Mins and 11 Seconds was the readout,

I had done it by 11 seconds, I had pulled back 40 seconds and beaten my time by a further 11 seconds, I was exhausted, As I stopped I half fell into the bush outside my house, I was so tired………but I was ELATED….

I had turned failure into success, So many times in my life I have dwelled on the negative and it has held me back, killing me from the inside, Today though I had turned my attitude from I COULDNT do it, to I WILL DO IT…I was against the odds, going up hill after a day at work but I never EVER  questioned my desire and that carried me through, my desire overwhelmed my pain and exhaustion and gave me what I craved for the day A NEW PERSONAL BEST……………Thanks to Lance Armstrong I now know how to turn any situation into my favour, This one was for you Lance.