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Ann,

Thank you.

I am in a much better mood today and am no longer in timeout with Nico.

I am back to the real world.

I am glad this did not last very long.

I hate my mental illnesses, but I am glad that I have the coping skills that I do to know how to survive with them.

ID is my favorite channel too.

Have an absolutely fabulous Tuesday.

 Back again with the same problems. The kinda of leveled out for alittle while but now it seems like they are worse than before. I guess I will have to call the doc and let him know that this crazy bit is not a good thing for me. I am eating things that I KNOW will make me sick. My protein was pretty low during my last round of blood work and I got yelled at. I just crave carbs and LOTS of them. I will drink soda KNOWING that when I wake up in the morning i will be so bloated it hurts. I will eat cereal KNOWING that I will dump and be miserable for hours. But yet I can eat 2 large peanut butter cookies and nothing happens. I do NOT want to regain my weight back and I STILL have a lot to lose. This mental illness crap is gonna kill me yet. But on the bright side. My long term disabiltiy did come through and I have completed the SSI disabiltiy paperwork with the help of a third party that my LTD uses. 

I just don't know what to do. I know that I need to push my insurance into finding a talk therapist that does eating disorder couseling before i wind up in the hopital from eating to much and doing somthing to my pouch. :(

Thanks for listening.

I'm in a foul mood.


What should have taken me 15 min to get home took an hour.


A WHOLE FREAKING HOUR!!!


I can't get that hour back you know.


I hate I- 635.


I have my friends PMS I think cause I'm a straight up BEYOTCH today.


Thx for sharing the wealth my friend.


Please tread lightly

• 
  I'm annoyed today for some unknown reason and today is a day that I
  just need to be all alone.
  
  
  This is my BPD showing it's ugly head.
  
  
  I HATE this part of me.
  
  
  HATE IT HATE IT HATE IT, but it is what it is.
  
  
  At least I recognize my triggers.
  
  
  I hope you all had a better day than me.
  
  
  I have wished violent "Wicked Attraction" (http://investigation.discovery.com/tv/wicked-attraction/) deaths upon people all day long.  
  
  
  Nico & I are in bed where we will stay for the rest of today & all day tomorrow.
  
  
  If you need us im, text, or email us as WE will not be answering any doors or phones.
  
  
  WE are having a BPD/Bipolar time out & need solitude to re-adjust our attitudes.
  
  
  Please respect our wishes.
  
  
  I hope you all are safe, sound, & are at home relaxing.
  
  
  Hope you all GOT 'ER DONE today.
  
  
  Have an absolutely fabulous Monday evening.
  
  
  ♥ ya'll.
  
  
  Even though I feel like crap right now I can still educate you all.
  
  
  These are some of the symptoms I go through with my BPD.
  
  
  http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/borderline-personality-disorder-fact-sheet/index.shtml
  
  
• 
   

When you said 'my mind that failed', what did you mean?  Are you dealing with mental illness? Or just not able to get in the mind set of the rules of wls?

just curious, because I dont know how to respond....


bm

It has been 8 yrs and I am very disapointed that I have failed. Not my tool that failed was my mind. I just am at a loss.