Post Surgery 18 mos plus.......
Katie Jay - How to let go of Your Food Crutch
How to Let Go of Your Food Crutch
by Katie Jay, MSW, Certified Wellness Coach
Director, National Association for Weight Loss Surgery
www.nawls.com
Even though you say you want to be successful with your surgery, do you sometimes eat when you wish you wouldn't? When it comes to eating, is guilt a frequent companion of yours?
Welcome to the club.
In our culture, with the amount of unhealthy food we're exposed to, and with the holiday stresses bearing down on us, it's safe to say many Americans, including WLSers, will be using food as a crutch in the coming weeks. In fact, eating food with no nutritional value during the holidays has become such an accepted pastime, we don't even realize that we are eating to deal with feelings. And because holiday eating is sanctioned by nearly everyone, we have a golden opportunity to hide in plain sight -- to use our crutch without anyone really knowing we're using it. We take a brief vacation from the guilt (or at least we try to). "I am not going to feel deprived at Thanksgiving," we insist. "I can handle a little indulgence." "I've been so good this year, I deserve a holiday from food rules!" "I've modified the recipe; this is *healthy* fudge."
Clearly, some of us *can* handle a little indulgence, but why do we tempt fate? Why do we turn to food with gusto and self righteousness? Feelings. Many of us don't want to feel our feelings. We don't like the discomfort of deprivation, longing, feeling different from others, isolation, loneliness, anger, fear, sadness, shame, loss, or abandonment.
The truth is, however, that finding healthier ways to deal with our uncomfortable feelings is essential to long-term success. Even when you feel resistance to putting down the food crutch, it boils down to this:
Do you want long-term obesity remission or don't you?
I had to look in the mirror and ask myself that question a few days ago, as I obsessed about whether or not I should make gluten-free brownies for myself. "Maybe I can handle desserts," I reasoned like a pro. "Maybe it's been the gluten all along, and I really can handle more
sweets!"
When I asked myself whether or not I wanted to keep my obesity in remission, I knew the answer immediately -- yes!
Some of us aren't so lucky. We really don't know what we want. We don't know if putting down our food crutch is possible, or even desirable. Is it worth feeling all those negative feelings just so we can stay a size 12 (or whatever)? Apparently, the answer for some of us is "NO!" The only way to know if it's worth it is to give it a try, to put down the crutch long enough to see what might happen once we get used to living without it -- and to see that we can survive, or even better, thrive. There are a ton of resources available to help us learn to stop using food as a crutch, but the bottom line is that we need to put down the offending foods, identify and feel our feelings, find healthier ways to deal with those feelings, and get as much support as necessary to accomplish this challenging task.
Here's what seems to work for most people:
1. Devise a strategy you will experiment with when you have uncomfortable feelings, instead of using food as a crutch.
2. Take a few minutes first thing each morning to visualize yourself moving through your day, trying out your new strategy, allowing your feelings, and making healthy food choices.
3. Resolve to be self aware before, during, and after your eating -- no matter what.
4. Welcome your feelings warmly and "make small talk" with them, so you can understand what they are trying to tell you about your needs.
5. Honor your needs.
6. Notice without judgment the thoughts and feelings you are having about your feelings.
7. Make notes about what you did in response to an uncomfortable feeling instead of eat, and how well it did or didn't work for you.
8. Resolve to stick with the experiment until you know whether or not the new strategy can work.
9. If the new strategy is not working, get more support. If it still isn't working, do some research and try another strategy.
10. Never give up!
As one of my coaching clients reminded me recently, the only way out is through. To keep obesity in remission, we need to practice putting our food crutch down, and bravely feel our feelings, as often as we can.
It's possible!
Warm regards,
Katie
*****************************************************************
From Small Bites, the email newsletter for the National Association for Weight Loss Surgery.
Subscribe today and get your F'REE report, How to Regain-proof Your Weight Loss
Surgery at www.NAWLS.com. (c) 2010 National Association for Weight Loss Surgery,
Inc. All rights reserved.
by Katie Jay, MSW, Certified Wellness Coach
Director, National Association for Weight Loss Surgery
www.nawls.com
Even though you say you want to be successful with your surgery, do you sometimes eat when you wish you wouldn't? When it comes to eating, is guilt a frequent companion of yours?
Welcome to the club.
In our culture, with the amount of unhealthy food we're exposed to, and with the holiday stresses bearing down on us, it's safe to say many Americans, including WLSers, will be using food as a crutch in the coming weeks. In fact, eating food with no nutritional value during the holidays has become such an accepted pastime, we don't even realize that we are eating to deal with feelings. And because holiday eating is sanctioned by nearly everyone, we have a golden opportunity to hide in plain sight -- to use our crutch without anyone really knowing we're using it. We take a brief vacation from the guilt (or at least we try to). "I am not going to feel deprived at Thanksgiving," we insist. "I can handle a little indulgence." "I've been so good this year, I deserve a holiday from food rules!" "I've modified the recipe; this is *healthy* fudge."
Clearly, some of us *can* handle a little indulgence, but why do we tempt fate? Why do we turn to food with gusto and self righteousness? Feelings. Many of us don't want to feel our feelings. We don't like the discomfort of deprivation, longing, feeling different from others, isolation, loneliness, anger, fear, sadness, shame, loss, or abandonment.
The truth is, however, that finding healthier ways to deal with our uncomfortable feelings is essential to long-term success. Even when you feel resistance to putting down the food crutch, it boils down to this:
Do you want long-term obesity remission or don't you?
I had to look in the mirror and ask myself that question a few days ago, as I obsessed about whether or not I should make gluten-free brownies for myself. "Maybe I can handle desserts," I reasoned like a pro. "Maybe it's been the gluten all along, and I really can handle more
sweets!"
When I asked myself whether or not I wanted to keep my obesity in remission, I knew the answer immediately -- yes!
Some of us aren't so lucky. We really don't know what we want. We don't know if putting down our food crutch is possible, or even desirable. Is it worth feeling all those negative feelings just so we can stay a size 12 (or whatever)? Apparently, the answer for some of us is "NO!" The only way to know if it's worth it is to give it a try, to put down the crutch long enough to see what might happen once we get used to living without it -- and to see that we can survive, or even better, thrive. There are a ton of resources available to help us learn to stop using food as a crutch, but the bottom line is that we need to put down the offending foods, identify and feel our feelings, find healthier ways to deal with those feelings, and get as much support as necessary to accomplish this challenging task.
Here's what seems to work for most people:
1. Devise a strategy you will experiment with when you have uncomfortable feelings, instead of using food as a crutch.
2. Take a few minutes first thing each morning to visualize yourself moving through your day, trying out your new strategy, allowing your feelings, and making healthy food choices.
3. Resolve to be self aware before, during, and after your eating -- no matter what.
4. Welcome your feelings warmly and "make small talk" with them, so you can understand what they are trying to tell you about your needs.
5. Honor your needs.
6. Notice without judgment the thoughts and feelings you are having about your feelings.
7. Make notes about what you did in response to an uncomfortable feeling instead of eat, and how well it did or didn't work for you.
8. Resolve to stick with the experiment until you know whether or not the new strategy can work.
9. If the new strategy is not working, get more support. If it still isn't working, do some research and try another strategy.
10. Never give up!
As one of my coaching clients reminded me recently, the only way out is through. To keep obesity in remission, we need to practice putting our food crutch down, and bravely feel our feelings, as often as we can.
It's possible!
Warm regards,
Katie
*****************************************************************
From Small Bites, the email newsletter for the National Association for Weight Loss Surgery.
Subscribe today and get your F'REE report, How to Regain-proof Your Weight Loss
Surgery at www.NAWLS.com. (c) 2010 National Association for Weight Loss Surgery,
Inc. All rights reserved.
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OMG... thanks soo much for posting. Of course my mom had to go into a rant this AM about how I am this and that....just spewed negative feelings toward me... WTF is wrong with her...I"m 50 yrs old and she stil has to criticize me..
Of course I wanted to eat when I'm not hungry.... I 'm just going to keep busy some how doing something else.
CC
Of course I wanted to eat when I'm not hungry.... I 'm just going to keep busy some how doing something else.
CC
Thank you for posting this article and providing the link! Whata great site with wonderful resources!!!
Prek3
Prek3
Nov 10,2009 I reached GOALL BYE BYE 130 POUNDS! It wasn't about the FOOD, it was about what was eating at YOU! Time for a Head adjustment! **July 2011 Plastic Surgery Lower Body Lift
Exercise 
is not a LUXURY!
Exercise is a 
NECESSITY
