What's your goal weight?

 

 

I know that when I started this journey, the program I’m with asked me to articulate where I wanted to be in terms of size and weight. What would be the highest acceptable, what would be comfortable, what would be my ‘dream’ weight and size? This helped me try to look at my expectations and try to level them some. I have to admit my actual weight is not what I had anticipated. It’s actually lower. My husband is in the midst of his own journey and he’s not shooting for the ‘normal’ BMI range, because he’s been that small before and to be honest, it’s just too small for him… he really does have big bones and a muscled physique.

  

I think that when looking at what your goal weight should be, you need to work with your Dr and take a number of things into account: your starting weight/bmi, your bone structure, your build, your age, etc…

  

I also think that it’s important to realize the number on the scale, while important as a point of reference, is not the end all when determining if you are at a weight that is good for you. Do you feel wonderful? Are you able to do the things that you want and need to do to enjoy a fulfilled life? Are your vital signs where you need them to be to live long and healthfully? If these things are in line and the number on your scale is not where you had imagined, you might have reached your goal weight without knowing it.

  

So how do you think you will know when you have arrived at goal weight?

 

Please take a moment to post your thoughts on this topic to the Loser's Bench Discussion Forum.

 

Thanks,

I know you brought this up Saturday and I've been thinking about it ever since. I honestly don't know. That sounds bad - to me. I've made a transition into more or less black and white thinking and this clearly falls into my gray zone - and I'm not comfortable with that.

My surgeon and I discussed a goal weight - he hasn't given me one. He says that he's gotten to know me well enough that he feels setting a gaol number will end up driving me bonkers (hmmmmm.....he may be on to something there). The reaasons I had my surgery are still the same. I wanted // needed my health back. I've gained that and then some ALREADY and I'm nearly 8 months out. So my surgery has already been successful using that particular measuring standard.

I have a quality of life now that I never imagined existed. If I look back over my life (from childhood til now) and take away the extremes (grief & elation) and look at what was normal for me - I really didn't have much in terms of quality. The obesity also was robbing me of any quantity of life as well.

So to answer your question - I already feel WONDERFUL and I think that spirit and joy that I'm radiating is just about contagious. I feel complete for the first time in my adult life. So what now?

My journey is in no way, shape or form close to finished. I'd like to weigh in between 170 and 150.  I cannot remember a time when the scale was that low. It would definetly be prior to Jr. High school. I also imagine that at that particular weight I'd be wearing probably a size 10 or 12 (?) here again - never bought those before.

I'm in uncharted territory here. As much as that should terrify me - it excites me. It's like a big adventure - I don't want it to end but without having plotted a course how will I know when I've arrived. Will I care? To me it's sorta like retiring with the intent of sailing around the world (which David & I both would love to do). You have a definite starting point and some sailors map out the entire course with a set schedule. When anything comes up (or the wind doesn't blow) your schedule needs to be altered - how flexible am I going to be to change course and enjoy the detours (stalls)?

hmmmmmmm........ OK now I'm thinking even more. Thanks - I think.....
- Iris

Great response!! You are always so thoughtful and articulate.

As you said, you've already met so many of the goals you set out to master with this journey. Like you, I didn't really have a reference point for myself as a normal sized woman, so it was anyone's guess. When I asked my surgeon what my 'ideal' weight would be he did some quick calculations and said 137. I thought 'Yeah Right!!', but put that away for safe keeping. I thought 150 to 160 would be good for me and to be honest, it's not bad at all. I wear a size 10 at that weight and am smaller than the average woman my age and height. I never in a million years really thought I'd ever weigh less than the Dr suggested. I didn't like it. I felt uncomfortable and too thin. Now, that I'm bouncing around 142 to 144, I'm mostly comfortable. I like my cheeks... top and bottom, but not the tummy that comes with them. I guess there are trade-offs with everything.

I look forward to watching you as you continue to morph into the healthiest you can be.... pretty, pretty too.

When I first started this journey, I was 5' 7 1/2" and weighed 307.  That was in October 2008.  I had to jump through numerous hoops for my insurance company in order to be approved.... one of which was a physician supervised weight loss program with extensive documentation of diet, exercise, behavior modification, etc.  I was told I had to lose weight prior to the surgery, but not given a specific amount, although a target of 10% was mentioned.  I lost 27 pounds on my own, with the help of my surgeon's registered dietician and my own physician.  When I finally saw my surgeon for the first time, he had me stand up, turn around, he looked through my chart, and said to me that he'd like to see me set my goal between 165 and 170 because I am tall and big-boned.  My hips are naturally wide (my Aunt was so thin that when she turned sideways, if she stuck out her tongue, you would have thought she was a zipper.... but from the back she was just WIDE.  I'm the same way.  Even in my adolesence and early teens before weight was much of a problem, I NEVER had a flat stomach, there was always a little roundness to it.  I thought that his idea of an ideal weight for me was too high.... I really wanted to be at about 145-150.  But I will be happy anywhere in between there.  I haven't weighed 170 since I got married, and I looked good then!  I had my surgery on March 2, and have officially lost 50 pounds since beginning this journey.  I don't feel as if the weight is coming off fast enough since surgery, but keep being told that everyone is different, and that it will happen.  I hope so, because I'm sticking to my program and drinking all I can and getting in all the protein I can and doing all my vitamins....

Hi Erica,

I'm 5' 5.5" and I'm currently about 144. They say that you can add 5 lbs an inch, so for your two additional inchest I would be about 154 using that guideline. Even though I have broad shoulders, a barrel ribcage and I'm just barely large boned, I wear a size 6... sometimes a 4, sometimes an 8, but mostly a 6. At 145 to 150, you would be about like I was at 135 to 140 and I personally found that a bit thin. Your Dr's suggestion that you end up around 160 to 170 is about like me at 150 to 160. If you look at the photos of me on my profile, you will see some of me in a black dress lounging across a chair and some in a black tuxedo. In those, I weigh 162 and I think I looked great in my size 10. I'll bet you will too.

Like you, I went on a supervised weightloss and and exercise program for 6 months before I had my surgery and I also lost weight with it.

Keep doing what you are doing. I know that it may feel like it's going fast enough right now, but it will come off... A year from now you will hardly believe the changes in your body and your life.

Hang in there!

If I had to give it a number, I would probably say 155 at 5'6".  However, at age 51, just  being able to feel healthy and get off my medications would make me deliriously happy. 

We are the same age and height. I have to say that at 155, I wore a size 8 or 10 and felt just fabulous. I'm sure you will too.

I agree.  I lost 125 pounds through a very sensible lifestyle plan before and was very happy at 155.  Unfortunately medications and other health issues had me gaining weight back quickly.  After 20 pounds, I sort of just gave up.  However, I have a new motto now.  If I gain two pounds and keep it for a few days, it belongs to me.  If I get it off right away, it belongs to the scales.

Nice perspective!

The Doctor has set my goal at 145...I'm good with that right now...I think I'll know when I get there if that is the right weight for me or if I need to go lower.  I don't want to look gaunt. I want to look and feel healthy. At 51 years of age I know that I'm not going to look like a super model no matter how much I lose.  I am sure I will feel it when I get to the perfect weight for me...