haven't posted in awhile and been a struggle

hello everyone.  i haven't been on in a long time and it's been a journey let me tell you.  i have had to switch surgeons due to the way i was treated after surgery.  so far i have lost 149 pounds and am told i am now underweight and need to gain some.  well how am i supposed to do that?  and how hard is that to hear after i've been overweight for so long?  i have to be honest i'm not taking my vitamins like i should and that is prolly going to get me in trouble but i take so many other meds that another pill just turns my stomach.  it is hard getting used to this new body and not really changing the inside of me emotionally and mentally.  really working on that hard now.  it's also amazing how many more people will talk to me and the only thing that has changed is the outside of me.  i find that sort of frustrating and shows how superficial the world is honestly.  i am going to be reporting my surgeon to the medical board and the hospital i had the surgery at.  i had to have four additional procedures after the original surgery (may 2012) to fix what he screwed up.  i have co-pays and such that i am not going to pay because i don't feel they are my responsibility.   i want the practice to pay for them.  unfortunately the surgeon that i transferred to is in the same practice and i don't want to get booted out of the practice so i'm walking a fine line.  have the letter written but just haven't sent it yet with the bills.  i need to get better on my eating habits.  i have added a little sugar back into my diet not much but just a bit and i want to change that.  i want a diet with no sugar in it at all except what is already in the food that i am eating.  no candy or iced coffees and stuff like that.  so i have some things to work on.  haven't gotten the dumping syndrome that comes with sugar so that's why it's been added back in and also for the calorie intake as i need to gain a bit of weight back.  i just don't want to have to buy another wardrobe as i've already had to buy like four during the losing phases.  i have stabilized since may and haven't lost anymore so that's good.  going back to the surgeon in november to see what they have to say now.  i hope that everyone is doing well and i will try to stay more active.  jenn