Bariatric Buddy
How do deal with the anger
What a subject line huh? When I decided to take this surgery journey I had decided that not everyone needed to know. The few people I had mentioned it too were very negative and non-supportive. I finally told my sister due to the loss of our mom last year. I wanted her to know what I was doing in case something happened. It took me 4 months to tell my husband and that was because he noticed I was going to the doctor every month. He has been very supportive now and will continue to even through he really does not believe I need the surgery. This past weekend my mother in law called to see how things were going since my son had a concussion that happened at school and her birthday was on Friday. She said to me that I have so many things coming up including my surgery. I nearly fell on the floor since my husband and I had discussed that I was not talking to people about this because of the negative comments people tend to throw out there. Not only was I angry that he told her but his family can not keep their mouths shut and are worse than anyone I know for gossip. There will be no support given from them and it really bothers me that they know. I know there is nothing I can do and I need to let it go, but geezzzzz I'm not happy. Sorry to bring this here but I just needed to vent.
(((((((Lucy)))))))) hugs
I am so glad that you stopped to share and vent. That is what I am here for. Now that the word is out to your family. Do not let any negativity enter your life. You are doing something great for yourself. If you hear negative remarks, hold your head high, and know that you are super important.
Lay down the law, only positive comments allowed, share with family, starting with your hubby (so he can share with those that need to know) that positive comments are very welcome and negative ones need not be shared, period. Do your best to surround yourself with positive.
Be kind to yourself today, you deserve it. This has been quite a challenge, all the prep and visits before surgery and you are doing this. Hang in there my friend. Lots a HUGS
I am so glad that you stopped to share and vent. That is what I am here for. Now that the word is out to your family. Do not let any negativity enter your life. You are doing something great for yourself. If you hear negative remarks, hold your head high, and know that you are super important.
Lay down the law, only positive comments allowed, share with family, starting with your hubby (so he can share with those that need to know) that positive comments are very welcome and negative ones need not be shared, period. Do your best to surround yourself with positive.
Be kind to yourself today, you deserve it. This has been quite a challenge, all the prep and visits before surgery and you are doing this. Hang in there my friend. Lots a HUGS
OH Support Group Leader
Come visit us at the bariatric buddy group http://www.obesityhelp.com/group/bariatricbuddy/welcome
Come visit us at the bariatric buddy group http://www.obesityhelp.com/group/bariatricbuddy/welcome
It is tough to get people to understand. My hubby in the beginning did not understand why I wanted to go down this road either. I then explained to him and he has been on board every since. I understand too about not wanting the in-laws to know. As for me, the in laws may never know and my husband and anyone else that I chose to share with were told that this is a very personal decision and that if I feel someone needs to know that it will be up to me to tell them. Sorry about the husband telling his mom. Maybe you can talk to him and let him know how hurt you are about it?? That might help you at least.
Take care of yourself - you deserve it.
Take care of yourself - you deserve it.
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Patrece S.
Group Leader
Kathy B.
Co- Leader