A message I received. -do people really do this

Ok, so i logged on today and had a msg from someone named Nicole (something like that) she said she read my stuff and does not know why i want to have the band.  She said i should have the ds because i will not lose the 170lbs i want to with the band.  WTH is up with that?  I could not even reply back to her, it did not give me the option to.  First she says she means no harm but how can someone have the nerve to suggest to me another type of wls? If she had read my posts then she would know I have debated my decision.  Further more, i have read and seen plenty of band people who have lost over 150lbs.  It's a toll to help me, it's not gonna melt the fat away and restructure my body.  

Anyway i'm just a bit pissed off i even got a msg like that and i find it weird that it does not give me the option to reply back to her!

Thanks for the vent!

Afraid they do Shawn.  Do not internalize the war some choose to start.  Feel free to delete the message and come here to vent and get the positive support you need.  Some folks think that the surgery they chose is THE ONLY ANSWER.  They are wrong.  You have done the research, worked with your MD to make the best decision for your situation.  I stand behind your decision.

Don't stoop to her level and allow her to affect your day.  Hugs, Kathy

thank you, but she did affect my day, it's something i need to work on, but i am an emotional eater and when i get upset or frustrated it triggers me, so tonite was not a good night.  But i will not let it set me back, i will just begin again tomorrow and work on not letting things frustrate me to where i want to eat.

Please, come vent before you do more harm to your body.  We are here for you.  Good idea to restart fresh.  You are sooooo much stronger than those words this person posted.  Seek out help for the stress eating.  We all do it.  Part of why we are here seaking assistance with our weight.  The surgery will be a tool (makes our stomachs smaller), please take the time to make your mind as strong as you can in your resolve.

Before taking that first stress bite consider your options, journal you thoughts and feelings, come post here on OH.  Try to distract with something else, a walk, bath, exercise, card game, hobby, call a friend.  Take care and know that you are worth the effort.  Hugs, Kathy

Okay, I am sure that this Nicole was just trying to point out other options to you, but you are the one making the decision that affects YOUR body and YOUR life, so feel comfortable with that.  I think you are very brave to take control of your life in this way - it's a big step, but one that will pay off big time.  I hope that 2010 will be your best year yet, so don't let an insensitive comment turn your day upside down. 

a jerk is a jerk and she sounds like one.  don't let her control your thoughts.  vick

Shawn,
I agree with Linda and Kathy. Don't take it too seriously. If you have been aroung the main boards, you will notice that someone is always to trying to bulldoze over others saying that their surgery is the best one. That's what is so great about BB- we come here and get support, encouragement, humor, help, answers, etc. without fear of being blasted for an innocent comment. Maybe the person meant well, like Linda said, but I agree with you that she had no right to act as if you just pulled your decision out of  a hat without researching what you felt is the best procedure for YOU. Now that you've expressed your emotions, let out a big breath that takes all those bad feelings away and sends them off into the atmosphere! I think I like that image and will try doing that myself when I am angry! (I've got to find new ways of dealing with my emotions since I won't be able to eat them away anymore : )

Rhonda

Shawn..
i don't understand how someone can mesage and you not have the option to reply. Thats weird.. have never encountered it. BUT what I recommend, if it is very disturbing to you, is to see if there is an option somewhere like on most messages to add the person to your ignore list, then you do not ever have to hear from them again.

meanwhile.. A big hug coming your way. Yes that gal has a lot of nerve! I do not ever like it when someone assumes they can decide what is or isn't right for me. It burns me biscuits it does! I have learned to deal with these agressive types better tho, so i do not end up punishing mE over their wrong. You will find a way to do the same. It might not be now, but you will.

Until then, if you MUST engage in emotinal eating, be sure to have some nice fruits or veggies on hand to munch your way through the frustration. This will be a great step in the right direction, until you have learned to curb the emotional eating.

Hang in there gal.. we are on your side here no matter what you decide. You are free to be you here!

it's funny i got another msg from someone else, they began apologizing for nocolle and i looked and saw i could not reply to them. i did not even finishing reading, i just blocked it rightaway and deleted it.

I have since blocked both users and i am moving on and not letting them affect me anymore.

AWESOME! Good for you!  I knew you could do it.. Big hugs! yet another shining example of why Bariatric Buddy group was born!
I never even go elsewhere except to post on the Colorado forum about my live support group meetings, and the plastic surgery forum to get info on that.
We love ya! Glad you found us!