rocks in the road

Went for my preop physical today and the EKG was abnormal so they have to do an echocardiagram.  My left lower chamber not pumping the blood it should probably due to weight and high blood pressure.  May not postpone my surgery, if I can get everything done and ok'd but I don't think I can handle a postponement.  I feel like I HAVE to get this done to have anything close to a normal life.   I am so sick of things happening everyday that remind me how fat I am.  Today it was the gown in the EKG lab that didn't fit.  Everyday it is something.  I need this damn surgery and it seems like there is just one thing after another.  I can't calm down and just wait to find out.  I can't find calm.  I don't want the fat to kill me and that is what it is doing and right now I feel like the fat is winning.

hang in there. u don't know yet what is going to happen, so try to be calm, if u can find it.  my thought are with u anad i hope u get the surgery soon.  once u do, i will scoot over so u can sit on the losers bench beside me. vick

OK my friend, we are going to do an exercise together.  Take in a deep breath, slowly exhale, letting some of that panic escape right along with the deep breath.  Repeat the breathing three times.  Listen to that voice deep inside you that is telling you, this too will pass.  For it will.  We all know how it is to be in a world designed for much smaller folks.

Take one hurdle at a time.  Come here for all the support you need, we always have a shoulder to lean on.  What does your MD want next?

Report back to us.  Hugs, Kathy

I can surely understand your frustration, fear and anger. But hang in there.  Your day will come. It may not be postponed, so try not to feel defeated or set bac****il you know it to be a fact. They may decide they cannot afford to wait on it, for your health.

I always hated the gowns not fitting, the seat belt extenders, always being the fattest person wherever I was, you name it. I know how horrible it feels. It is going to happen for you, they may just have to get your heart a bit more under control. but don't give up. It will happen. Maybe no delay, maybe a slight delay, but it will be. Just please breathe and ccenter and don't let it get you down until you know there is an absolute reason to.

Keep coming here and ventoing to us. We are here for you.
All my love and great big comforting hugs to you my friend.