My second day

Boy do I want to eat!  I did well today but getting my mind around the fact that I am in control as to whether or not I gain weight (instead of the bypass) is a zinger. 

I can tolerate some sugar and the taste buds are getting into great shape.  The head hunger is on full  riot status.  The texture of food is important to me again.  And bread!  I love bread! 

BUT YOU KNOW...I can't give in.  Why go through all this, the surgery, three months of systemic gout after surgery.  So sick I wished food didn't exist, etc. to only let it "get" me again?

We didn't do all this to experience the great suffering once again.  Remember when we were fat and we were invisible?  Or when we were noticed the looks on people's faces?   Remember when we couldn't fit into booths or airplane seats or had to wear clothes that made us look older than we really were?

Remember how hard it was to walk and breathe at the same time?  There's lots more that made me miserable...

So, if you are reading this....What don't you miss about being fat????? 

I don't miss that I was too big to fit in an airplane seat, it was my first trip to Italy 6 months befor my RNY and I weighted well over 300 pounds and I was on a flight with Air France.  I was so big I could not let my dinner tray down to eat dinner and they sat me next to an even larger guy it was the worst flight ever!

And when I would get angry at something some one may had did, and if I showed that angry side of me because of my size people were afraid of me. 

There's a lot to reflex on.  No matter what others say I am still glad I had the surgery, who knows where I could have been today without it.  I was a ticking time bomb.  For years I had been a health over weight person but that changed and it changed quickly.  So, when I hear others talk about oh so and so took the easy way out and had surgery, their weak, etcetc I am quick to jump in and say well I had this done 12 years ago and it was a benefit. 

Wow...I get it.  ...surgery was no picnic!  I'm old enough to know I was never going to lose it.  It was pure desperation.

I don't miss being out of breath all the time.  I don't miss elastic waist pants.  I don't miss the looks and stares when I went out to eat, or walmart or the mall.  I don't miss being unhappy because I was fat.

 I don't miss elastic waist pants

hey... they are comfy... I still wear them... smaller size.. but I do... love them. (and with no butt - I need the elastic to keep them in place)

I don't miss the comments. " You would be so beautiful if you just lost X amount of pounds! OR " I don't see you as fat, I just see you as you(by so called friends). I also don't miss the daily misery of trying to find clothes that "hide" my fat.

We were in SO much pain...both mental and physical.  It makes me very, very sad. 

We're not there anymore but the scars are horrific.

I don't miss feeling like I had to do everything everybody asked me to do & being agreeable even when I didn't want to, cuz why would anybody want a fat person as their friend if their friend didn't help them with everything, & boost them up & make their lives easier...

I'm finally comfortable with saying "NO" or venturing my opinion instead of just going with the flow all the time...

I don't miss
- shopping at specialty stores and paying a lot of money to look OK
- needing large towels - and strugling in hotels to dry myself with "normal" towels
- overfilling the bathtub when I wanted to take the bath
- wondering if I can fit in a boot in a reastaurant
- not be able to buy and wear nice boots (knee-high)
- not be able to wear high heels
- big and bvery heavy (DDDD) boobs

and so on...

I don't miss not being able to breathe, fit into booths,
having the largest size available being tight, and not
using those motorized carts in stores because I was
too heavy to walk with the arthritis in my knees. Taking
off weight really helped so much. Although I'm thankful
they have those carts for those of us who need them.