Back On Track Together
How to survive a Treacherous Social Gathering?
Reprinted from a previous edition of Small Bites!
How to Survive a Treacherous Social
Gathering
by Katie Jay, MSW, CTA-certified Wellness Coach
Director, National Association for Weight Loss Surgery
www.nawls.com "It's a chocolate martini!" the woman slurred at me
with a friendly grin on her face. She was holding out a chilled martini glass containing
a dark brown liquid. I was surprised by the interesting
combination -- and a little curious. "She doesn't drink," my sister swooped in and took the
glass. "I'm sorry, Katie," she looked at me
apologetically. My sister is one of the few people on this planet who
has seen me in the grips of alcohol addiction. It's
been nearly 25 years since I had a drink, and believe
me, going back to it would be about the stupidest thing
I could do. "I'm fine, Sis!" And I was. I had no intention of
trying the chocolate martini. This minor event, though, kicked off an evening I
wouldn't want to repeat anytime soon. Avoiding alcohol,
birthday cake, brownies, and other treats at a
boisterous party is, for me, a stressful task. Yet, I'm glad I was there for my sister's 50th
birthday party. I wanted to be there for her. In part,
that's why I chose to LIVE -- that's why I had WLS. Ironically, I spent most of the evening talking to
people about drinking and food. When I tried to change
the subject, someone would join in and start talking
about the chocolate martinis or the lavish desserts
again. As planned, I had my one small plate of hors d'
oeuvres early in the evening. I selected the
protein-based treats -- a few cheese cubes, a
tablespoon of the chicken/artichoke dip (no crackers),
and a small slice of tender roast beef. I'm happy with this, I thought, but by midnight, I
wasn't so happy anymore. After a woman spilled wine in my shoe, I felt my
frustration bubble up. Food. Food. Food. Alcohol. Alcohol. Alcohol. Grrrrrrrrrrr. That's when I adopted my "Death-by-Olives" Strategy.
I decided that I wanted to eat something that felt,
well, a little naughty. Not sweets, not a martini,
just something I wouldn't normally have. I perused the buffet. I could have more beef, I
thought. No, that didn't sound very fun. And then
I spied the olive tray. That's it, I thought! I
love olives. I gave myself permission to have as many olives as
I wanted. I ate 6 -- three green and three black.
I was happy. I think I had about 6 more olives around 2 a.m. (I
needed a break from singing with the chocolate-martini
woman, who had roped me, her "new sister," into
playing the American Idol video game.) It was either
play American Idol or sit on the back porch and talk
politics with a group of crass, inebriated men. When the guests were leaving, an old friend of my
sister's, who has seen me through all my challenges
over the years, looked warmly at me. He slurred, "Katie, you look great." "Thank you," I smiled, feeling confident and at
peace with myself. "I love talking about writing with you," he smiled
back. He has been talking to me about writing for
years, but has his own personal challenges that
keep him from it. "Me, too," I agreed. "But mostly, I envy you," he kissed me on the cheek
and left. As I stood there watching him wobble down the
hallway, I realized avoiding chocolate martinis
and birthday cake isn't deprivation at all. It's freedom. ********************************************************* Want to Reprint this Newsletter?
If you'd like to reprint any part of this newsletter,
do so with the following credit, including the copyright
line:
From Small Bites, the email newsletter for the
National Association for Weight Loss Surgery.
Subscribe today and get your F'REE report,
How to Regain-proof Your Weight Loss Surgery at www.NAWLS.com.
(c) 2010 National Association for Weight Loss Surgery,
Inc. All rights reserved.
Director, National Association for Weight Loss Surgery
www.nawls.com "It's a chocolate martini!" the woman slurred at me
with a friendly grin on her face. She was holding out a chilled martini glass containing
a dark brown liquid. I was surprised by the interesting
combination -- and a little curious. "She doesn't drink," my sister swooped in and took the
glass. "I'm sorry, Katie," she looked at me
apologetically. My sister is one of the few people on this planet who
has seen me in the grips of alcohol addiction. It's
been nearly 25 years since I had a drink, and believe
me, going back to it would be about the stupidest thing
I could do. "I'm fine, Sis!" And I was. I had no intention of
trying the chocolate martini. This minor event, though, kicked off an evening I
wouldn't want to repeat anytime soon. Avoiding alcohol,
birthday cake, brownies, and other treats at a
boisterous party is, for me, a stressful task. Yet, I'm glad I was there for my sister's 50th
birthday party. I wanted to be there for her. In part,
that's why I chose to LIVE -- that's why I had WLS. Ironically, I spent most of the evening talking to
people about drinking and food. When I tried to change
the subject, someone would join in and start talking
about the chocolate martinis or the lavish desserts
again. As planned, I had my one small plate of hors d'
oeuvres early in the evening. I selected the
protein-based treats -- a few cheese cubes, a
tablespoon of the chicken/artichoke dip (no crackers),
and a small slice of tender roast beef. I'm happy with this, I thought, but by midnight, I
wasn't so happy anymore. After a woman spilled wine in my shoe, I felt my
frustration bubble up. Food. Food. Food. Alcohol. Alcohol. Alcohol. Grrrrrrrrrrr. That's when I adopted my "Death-by-Olives" Strategy.
I decided that I wanted to eat something that felt,
well, a little naughty. Not sweets, not a martini,
just something I wouldn't normally have. I perused the buffet. I could have more beef, I
thought. No, that didn't sound very fun. And then
I spied the olive tray. That's it, I thought! I
love olives. I gave myself permission to have as many olives as
I wanted. I ate 6 -- three green and three black.
I was happy. I think I had about 6 more olives around 2 a.m. (I
needed a break from singing with the chocolate-martini
woman, who had roped me, her "new sister," into
playing the American Idol video game.) It was either
play American Idol or sit on the back porch and talk
politics with a group of crass, inebriated men. When the guests were leaving, an old friend of my
sister's, who has seen me through all my challenges
over the years, looked warmly at me. He slurred, "Katie, you look great." "Thank you," I smiled, feeling confident and at
peace with myself. "I love talking about writing with you," he smiled
back. He has been talking to me about writing for
years, but has his own personal challenges that
keep him from it. "Me, too," I agreed. "But mostly, I envy you," he kissed me on the cheek
and left. As I stood there watching him wobble down the
hallway, I realized avoiding chocolate martinis
and birthday cake isn't deprivation at all. It's freedom. ********************************************************* Want to Reprint this Newsletter?
If you'd like to reprint any part of this newsletter,
do so with the following credit, including the copyright
line:
From Small Bites, the email newsletter for the
National Association for Weight Loss Surgery.
Subscribe today and get your F'REE report,
How to Regain-proof Your Weight Loss Surgery at www.NAWLS.com.
(c) 2010 National Association for Weight Loss Surgery,
Inc. All rights reserved.
HW 611 Pre-opW 580 LW 302 GW 238
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Cathy W.
Group Leader
Kathy S.
Moderator