VSG Maintenance Group
Friday, June 7, 2024
When I read your post last night I felt really upset for you. I know absolutely that you would never mock anyone or deliberately hurt anyone's feelings.
Maybe similar, maybe not, but I had a friend for almost 16 years until the friendship ended in a fiery explosion. She was super friendly immediately and always wanting to spend time together and help out. More friendly than most. Over the years it got to be a bit much with her sticking her nose into a lot of business that wasn't hers. Also along the way she had several altercations with other friends that ended up in fiery explosions too with her standing in front of their homes and swearing accusing them of things I knew that didn't do. I tried to remain friends because it was clear she had a mental health issue but was getting help. The last summer i spent any time with her came to a head with several incidents. One was her son attempting to commit suicide. When I visited him in the hospital, she was totally energized by what had occurred and madly searching for someone to blame. Her husband and son were disgusted. Her husband took me aside in the hall and said he didn't know how much he could take and that she had been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. She told me later that this was true but she was going to intensive therapy. I later read about the therapy which teaches people with the disorder to react more appropriately to situations though they really don't change internally. Incident 2 was her insisting that she had to tell me that DS was gay, which I had already figured it out but he hadn't told us himself yet. I was so angry at her inserting herself in our family business and usurping his right to tell us. He found out because her son told him and was very sorry he had mentioned it to his mother. Final incident was when she had a physical altercation with her 18 year old son and he called the police. She was the aggressor and the worst he did was to put her in a headlock to calm her down. When the police arrived they heard both sides and told her that they had to take one of them into custody as this was one of several domestic violence calls to their house (and followed the attempted suicide). She told them to take her son. I know the true story because she called me to borrow money to bail him out. She told me she lied about him being the aggressor because she couldn't stand the thought of possibly losing her daughter. Fast forward a bit and her son ended up asking to live with us for a while and she started calling me to scream "F" words and tell me I was evil. And the story behind the incident changed to her being the victim. She really believed her new story just as she really believed the stories she made up about other friends in the past. For the next couple of years she told people how evil I was and that we allowed her son to live with us to use him as a slave. He did mow the lawn, but not at our request - he was thankful.
My life was much calmer after she was out of it and I have since leaned a lot about Borderline Personality. When I sense it in someone I stay very clear.
Maybe similar, maybe not but it reminded me of that awful time.
Oh my gosh Liz. What a stalwart and caring friend you were. When there are kids involved like her son, I think we put up with more than we typically would, because to leave the troubled friend is also to leave the young person. I'm sorry you went through all that turmoil. Thank you for sharing. If something so crazy happened to someone like you who has it so together, then maybe I'm okay too.
Greetings all
It's sunny and lovely here today. We have had highs over 60 for 10 days which is a record for this place. Bring it on.
Not much going on today. I am attacking mount laundry. Cannot figure out how I have so much to wash when I wear stuff more than once and DO NOT dress for dinner.
DH had his lunch out today and brought home a tuna melt. Yay for that. Our friend who was hospitalized for 7 weeks showed up and appears to be doing quite well.
Dog bath CC! Quite the chore. But yeah, quick dry in the dry heat. Has Kirby shown any more interest in the pool? Bet he will get in the water in MI.
DD sorry about your issue with your longtime friend. Why do people send such emails? I have always believed that you should not send anything in a letter or email that you are reluctant to say face to face. If you are afraid to say it, what does that tell you? I suspect this person wants you to grovel or whatever. Not worth the effort I suspect. Congrats on making it through another school year so you can enjoy a great summer. And enjoy time with parental figures and friends. (A college friend always referred to her parents as the parental figures).
It's fire day at the studio. I am awol from there today. Had a chat with one of our new board members and we will be meeting to go over the financial statements so she can learn to read them. I enjoy that minimal mentor role but find myself talking about all this ancient history......
Ha ha Peps is at Woodstock. I went to that show once. A hoot. They play the Jimmy Hendrix Star Spangled Banner, have lava lamps and everyone wears tie dyed stuff and Nehru jackets. Of course, everyone around here wears tie dyed stuff all the time.
Diane S
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on 6/7/24 4:57 pm
He was pretty good for the bath! He isn't a smelly dog but I caught a whiff of urine when he jumped on me this morning. Gross TMI, but on a long-haired dog, those guide hairs around their "pee tail" (as my mom called male dog parts) get yucky. I should have just given him an undercarriage bath, but in for a penny, in for a pound. I read something once that said not to trim them on a golden. Dog groomers, is that accurate advice?
We tried the pool again and he had no interest in even trying to stand on the submerged deck (only a few inches deep). I think the lake will be easier when he can walk in.
