Tuesday, October 19, 2021

Last nights pool party was good. I enjoyed chatting with several of our neighbors. They plan to have these once a month - apparently that was the tradition pre-Covid. The appetizer I brought was healthy for us but hardly touched by others so I will have to come up with something else. But since I knew it was healthy it is all I ate.

Today we will likely go to the Beach Club. I'm planning to have gazpacho with some grilled chicken added. I tried the soup last week and it was great but not filling at all (hence the grilled chicken addition).

We are having a formal portrait taken for the club membership roster next week. Mike tried on his suit to make sure it fit as he hadn't worn it in several years - it is a little big but will work. I have a black dress which should be okay except I have the opposite problem in that it is a bit tight. Oh well. These pictures will show up whenever staff looks for member information and when we look someone up online. We can also purchase copies if we like them though last night I heard they are very expensive so nobody in our neighborhood has purchased them. It is nice that Mike wants to do this with me. I was totally neutral on it but he wanted to do it so I guess he feels pretty permanent. Of course I am listed in the roster as "spouse" because they don't have any other terms available. Funny as I found out in the last week that many of the couples we have met here are also not married.

Not much else going on. Have a safe and healthy Tuesday!

Liz, interesting that many of your Florida peers are also unmarried. I know my father ended up deciding not remarry after my mom died. I think he would have, but his girlfriend was not eager and then the relationship naturally morphed into a comfortable routine which they've kept up for 15 years.

Yesterday calories were somewhere in the 2700 neighborhood. Carbs were super high - 320+ grams. 93 grams protein and 130 grams fat.... Boy, did it take some positive thinking to be an observer on yesterday's eating. I know though that my eating wasn't super horrible. I did lack fruits and veggies, though. I also did some stress eating at school, but again knew I was doing it and wanted to see how it affected the macros for the day so I just went with it.

The scale did not reflect the higher carb day.

Shrink session yesterday was one of reflection and looking ahead and what I want to work on in the months ahead. Right now I am simply going to focus on the phrase, "I'm okay as I am." I think you all know how hard that is for me, so it's an excellent place to start.

Developing a method to declutter is also on my personal agenda. I think I have a lot of mental and physical clutter that I need to sort through and purge. Starting with the physical always helps me with the mental. I feel like the last two years I have lost focus on the organization of my clerical, financial life and also the minutia of details that accompany everyday life.

I am still happy about having gone through the revision surgery exploration process and coming out the other side feeling like logical and emotional aspects were equally investigated and I came to the decision that was best for me.

Picked up the rig yesterday for this weekend's shows. Looking forward to our maiden voyage!

Weight a nice surprise at 185. I hiked 7 miles yesterday. Today I started the weed removal process yet again. Made it about 2/3rds of the way and had to quit. It hurts my hands. Napalm sounds like an appealing option. Alas, I have none.

I'm not sleeping well lately. I wake up at 3 or so and that's it. Oddly, I'm not tired during the day. Not really hungry either, which is nice for a change.

Hope you all are well!

Liz, I hope all those unmarried couples are now having the time of their lives. I wonder if many of them are like you, having come through great loss, and taking a chance on happiness and a second act. Second acts warm my heart. I have a couple of friends like your Mike, who have left a difficult marriage, and found a new life. As one told me about her abusive ex: That was one life, this is a new one.

Peps we could all do well to understand we are enough.

Cecily, I know the weeds you're battling. Napalm, blow torch, gasoline, incineration, you have the feeling they'd somehow survive.

Well my doctors visit was good, in that she listened to me, and ran some tests. Data is already back, everything is in normal range, including blood lipids. Blood pressure has crossed over to elevated, so I will be starting a low dose blood pressure med. Sigh. My doctor thought that the blood pressure and tamoxifen could be causing my fatigue. She wants to see me in 4 weeks, see if the medication is helping, and see if I need to consider other options like anti depressant.

My suitcase is packed, looks really pretty sitting by the door. I'm super happy with it so far. One more day of meetings, etc (no students) then off we go!

I hope you, DH, and your pretty suitcase have a fabulous time!

Yes, I think most of these folks are in a second run. They talk about their children from previous marriages. I have a friend from where I used to live in her mid-80s who just lost her partner of 25 years. They met when both widowed and she has always liked to tell the stories of when they first met and she wasn't interested in dating but he pursued her until she broke down. We all thought they were married until he died 6 months ago and we saw his obituary. She wore a very large diamond ring on her left hand which we all assumed was a wedding ring. In her partner's last days her son helped take care of him (he didn't have children).