Tuesday, September 28, 2021

OMG - OH just ate my post!!! Hopefully I can recreate it.

So glad to hear from Diane O again!

We leave for Florida in 11 days! Lots to do mostly around getting together with family and friends.

In fact several of Mike's long-term friends are coming for dinner today. One dates back to high-school, a couple from college, and a couple who were neighbors of his when he lived in Avon CT 30 years ago. I am glad he feels comfortable inviting them to my home (now his). We did pick a day when DS isn't here because though we enjoy him and his cooking, both he and the cat can be very large presences at times.

Time to run to get ready. The cat stuff needs to be corralled and the deck swept and tables cleaned in case it doesn't rain as currently projected.

Have a safe and healthy Tuesday!

It's a really pretty day here. I walked this morning. Did laundry and tidied today. I think I may have messed up things with MI guy (I wonder if he misinterpreted a text?). No texting yesterday after days of it, none today, and I sucked up the courage to ask if he wanted to have dinner several hours ago and no answer. He hunts and had said I should come turkey hunting with him next spring. I said eek, I know it's hypocritical as I could never be a vegetarian, but I wasn't sure if I could watch one hunted. He said it gives you a better appreciation for the meat we eat which I didn't have a chance to respond to before he said he needed to leave for the office so he could take Friday off to go hunting. I said have a good day! That was noon Sunday and nothing since. Oh well. I don't think I'm cut out for dating. I feel like I always do something wrong and it makes me feel bad about myself.

Hope you all are having a good one!

Interesting, that radio silence. Hmmmm.....

Should I apologize? I didn't realize I'd said anything that could be taken wrong until the silence. Regardless, the silent treatment/ghosting is really immature.

Apologize? Oh, hell NO!

You can ask if you said anything to offend him, but I would not apologize for having an opinion and sharing it. Like you said ghosting is pretty immature.

Years ago I was dating a Rabbi. We were sitting on a cliff overlooking the Pacific Ocean after a pretty lovely dinner. We were telling stories and I told him one about bargaining for a Christmas tree one year on Christmas Eve. I said I "chewed" the guy down. I didn't know that the term was really "Jew" down and was offensive. Marc said absolutely nothing at the time. The next day he offered a lesson in the term and I was horrified by my lack of understanding. Point here is that even though I was offensive as hell, he knew it wasn't intentional and he took the opportunity after the moment passed to "teach" me, so to speak. 30+ years later I still remember that lesson.

He could have also had some type of emergency. You just never know. Anyhow, mature, self secure men don't ghost people over opinions about hunting. It's not like you called him a murderer.... LOL

(We were typing at the same time!) I wrote a really nice apology over an hour ago and have no response. Maybe this is an Oprah moment - when someone tells you who they are, believe them.

I probably should have called, but we'venot called each other, just texted and gotten together for hikes. And I suck at explaining myself under pressure.

Nothing like not-quite-dating and falling out with someone in a small town of 400 you'll see every summer until you die...

Dating doesn't require that we do everything right. In fact one should be able to be themselves, albeit with some additional explanation required sometimes when something we say is misinterpreted.

Once I got very angry at Mike when he said something we disagreed about was "chicken ****". I thought he was calling me that but he was actually trying to say that the topic (which I can't even remember now) wasn't important enough to get upset about. It took a while to figure that out...

Hey, even after almost 30 years, Ron and I have communicative errors and disagreements about what is important and not important. Relationships are work, no matter what people say. Some take more work than others, but they all involve some kind of on going work.

I had a rather disquieting thought yesterday. It went something like this:

I am almost 60. How much time do I have left to be thin and fit? Does it really matter.... My life felt finite for an instance. It was a very odd feeling. I did not like it. The reality of mortality. Ick.....

Weight is stable. Eating is normal - for me at least! LOL

Juggling too many responsibilities seems to be taking a toll on me. Last weekend I double booked clients and I forgot that a friend was bringing her puppies to my house for an evaluation and I took off to the central valley to deliver my grooming equipment for transportation to Pennsylvania. Must work on my organization. I will need to work on my physical organization at home before I can get mentally organized. It's how I work. If I let the physical environment get too disorganized, the mental organization soon follows suit.

Another great workout last night. I am so glad I have working out as a recreation. I get so much out of it on an emotional level. The exercise and strength really help me feel confident and good about myself.

Ceci, your dad continues to be in my thoughts. He is going through a lot in a single week, as are you. MI guy can take a back seat this week.

Not much else for today.

Hey all ! I had a 10,000 step day before 11 AM. Love the fresh air and walking mentality. Fresh food abounds. I am so grateful for this restorative opportunity!