Sunday, July 26, 2020

Weight 122.8. Almost right at the top of my range but I ate properly yesterday so it should drop back through the week if I continue to do so.

So I almost put September 26 in the subject. Hmmm...Freudian slip? I was thinking yesterday that we were almost halfway through summer and there was nothing to look forward to this fall as there normally would, since I am not sure what I am doing about Florida this year.

I have been thinking about the overweight guy, who was also relatively short. I don't think it is the weight alone. I was always attracted to very tall, slim guys with dark hair (often with glasses). Admittedly the hair on most guys in my age range is grey or white now, but most have glasses. However it is hard for me to be physically attracted to someone who is shorter and/or rounder than I have typically been attracted to. If they are tall and round they scare me by their overall size, but height is a bit deal. And on top of that there is the food sobriety issue. Both my husbands were 6'3". I have a coffee date tomorrow morning. The guy is 6'2".

So when I went on the rail bike on Wednesday I hurt something In the back of my knee - likely a tendinitis thing. I decided to ignore it and did long walks with Justice on Friday and yesterday. So it is worse and now I have pain in my back on the same side. I'm assuming the latter is from favoring my knee when I was walking. Boy it stinks to get old. If it doesn't subside somewhat I may take some ibuprofen with my breakfast. I don't take it often but this is a real pain (literally).

Needless to say this may have to be a very quiet day. I was going to try to go kayaking this morning but somehow I don't think that is a great idea so maybe I will just go sit by the pond in a while before it gets busy.

Lastly: DH loved to bicycle though he couldn't in his last few years. He had an older bike designed by Greg Lemond (bike racer) that he really loved. DSD had it tuned up and adjusted to fit her and it looks like a brand-new bike. DH would be thrilled! She is tall enough to just fit it but it works! Here she is on the restored bike:

Have a safe and healthy Sunday!

I love the bike restoration. DSD can have this positive connection to her Dad for years to come. One of the things I kept of my grandma's was her rolling pin. She was constantly giving me cooking and baking tips, even up to about 3 weeks before she died. I love the connection I feel with her when I use her rolling pin and other kitchen tools.

It might do well to baby that knee a bit. My WLS clinic does allow for some ibuprofen, 600 mg per day, for 3 days, then needs to stop.

There is a USPS box in our freezer, with the words, do not open written in sharpe marker. My birthday is tomorrow. What could possibly be in that box?

I just finished reading The Giver of Stars. Story and writing was lightweight, but entertaining. The theme wasn't lightweight, but the plot was too convenient. Not every book I read has to challenge me, right?

Slow start to the day after a long chat with my friend. He's a morning person (and I am decidedly NOT), so I felt a bit annoyed and trapped when I saw his name come up on his early call. (See, I'm using my emotions list!) But we had a nice catch up and I quickly forgave him for breaking into my wake up period.

Our weather continues to be slightly below average in temp and therefore is perfection to me. I haven't needed the a/c in days! I had intended to walk yesterday, but my hips were telling me to take the day off and try again today. So I will do that.

My dad is doing well after getting some pills to stop spasms. He said other than those that were bad he feels fine. No results yet.

Nothing else to report...

Liz, I completely understand the description of your attraction to men. I also have a "type" to which I am drawn. BTW, I see a lot of Paul in DSD - her eyes and the way her eyebrows sit over her eyes reminds me very much of her dad.

Ocean Diane, how is the leg?

I think I felt a bit of joy when I got on the scale and I was 266.5 today. Simple pleasures.... However, maybe not so simple. I have not had food or eating angst in over a week. Instead, I am feeling a high level of consciousness about my food choices and what I want to eat. Admittedly, I am really enjoying listening to my food wants rather than my food shoulds and using a 'choices have consequences' approach to my eating without a judgement label.

I am nervous about flying on Tuesday night. I am not too nervous about the hotel or dog show. Just the flying part. Luckily, there are no plan changes, but we do have a layover both ways.

I have been steadfastly refusing for several years to part with my dog show suits from my very thin post WLS days. Needless to say that a 90+ pound gain means those clothes have been collecting dust for at least 5 or 6 years. I have decided that I am ready to part with them. Interestingly, I don't feel like I'm giving up and saying I won't fit into those clothes again. Rather, I have a sense of I need to close the door to that chapter. I need to look ahead. Those clothes also represent a level of addictive behavior in my post WLS life when I over, over, OVER spent on clothes I didn't need because it felt GOOD to buy stylish clothes in small sizes. Our next home project is organizing our small walk in closet. Having fewer suits, shirts, etc... will make planning the new organizers easier.

Not sure what is on the docket for today. It feels very Sunday-ish, so I am guessing I will just go with the flow.

It hurts to throw out stuff you spend hard earned money on, but I try to remind myself that even if it fit, would it still be in fashion or dated? Suit cuts change a lot over the years...

You are right! I can see Paul a lot in DSD's picture now that you point it out.

Getting rid of clothing we spent a lot of time and money buying is difficult for many of us I think, but Cecily has a point about style changes.

I agree with donating or consigning clothes that no longer fit. After several years, styles change, or our own tastes change. And one thing I've learned for sure, there are always clothes to buy if a person loses weight. I compare shopping pre surgery to after surgery: I was living in a clothes famine at my highest weight, and now I experience a clothes feast.

I also think donating is an act of releasing good intentions. As you mentioned, it opens up literal space in your closet, but I also think it opens up space in our hearts for something new.

I like that analogy of opening space in our hearts!

You are so right!!

I am not sending these clothes to to Goodwill, either. I am making a trip to downtown Oakland to donate them to an organization called Wardrobe for Opportunity. My then suit size is one of their 'critical need' sizes. Knowing that my suits that were bought with a sense of gluttony will be going to help a struggling man get back on his feet in a professional world makes me feel like the money was indeed well spent, after all.

Great site for donation!