Tuesday May 19, 2020

Weight 122.8, WW Bluepoints 10. I am up due to the overeating night before last. Funny how it seems to take an extra day to show up...

Yesterday I had a zoom bereavement meeting. I felt kind of crappy the rest of the day. I will try them once or twice more, but I'm not sure that ending up feeling like I am at the bottom of a garbage can is healthy for me right now. Most the other folks on the call are weeping and miserable all the time so it helps them to talk about it, but my way of dealing is to keep on moving and feel somewhat numb for a while until I feel strong enough to deal with the feelings.

It is beautifully bright this morning but with a strong chilly wind. I may have to get out for a long walk early before I sit and feel chilled (at which point I will probably wimp out). Maybe right after DS and I finish breaking down the many, many boxes for recycling? I don't know when he last did it, but I would guess DS missed more than one round (they take recycling every other week).

It is nice to have DD here though she is working during the day. We watched the movie Hall Pass last night - it was entertaining. We may play cards after dinner tonight.

So Massachusetts has a plan for reopening. A small number of former non-essential businesses like manufacturing were able to open this week with distancing and cleaning regulations. The beaches can open this coming Monday (Memorial Day) with proper distancing!!! Of course our local Health Agent has to determine how he is going to enforce that. And even how we can get our beach stickers. Also, personal care (beauty salons, barbers and nail places) can open Monday by appointment only, with proper distancing and cleaning. If all goes well, restaurants may be opening on June 8.

DD is still interested in going back to Florida for a bit in June. I am not sure how I feel about this especially if I would have to quarantine again.

Stay safe and healthy!

I would imagine Liz that you know very well how to navigate through your grief after surviving the loss of your daughter, and you should do what feels right for you.

Minnesota is about a week ahead of you. The tentative date for salons, resturants to open is June 1 here. My stylist is not reopening until fall, or possibly never. My niece is a very skilled colorist, and she said she would fit me in as soon as she rescheduled everyone who previously had appointments. That's fine with me, she is a 1 1/2 hour drive, so I don't think I will be able to be a regular client, so they absolutely should go before me.

We joined weigh****chers today, and I got blue. It seems like it will push me towards more carbs, and less fat. Foods I rely on for protein like cottage cheese, fairlife milk, and chobani yogurt add up fast! I do not care for Turkey anything, and chicken breast has to be just so, my sleeve is not a fan. The rotisserie chickens from Costco work. I had tuna for lunch, so in that regard, it encouraged me to try a new protein. Nonfat Greek yogurt could work. So I will definitely give it a try. I haven't been losing weight my way, so maybe the switch up is what I need.

Even if you're not currently doing your program, could you all tell me what some of your favorite go tos are? I know Cecily liked the blueberry muffin recipe. I had cucumber slices with cream cheese and everything but the bagel seasoning. That was yummy!

My main go-tos are:

• Cecily's muffin recipe
• egg/banana pancakes with SF syrup (one mashed banana mixed with one egg and cinnamon) fried in pan sprayed with Pam
• laughing cow cheese wedges
• Boars Head ever roast chicken
• lots of fish and vegetables
• three bean salad (canned green beans, chick peas and kidney beans mixed with lite rice vinegar)
• Cauliflower fried rice (there is a recipe in the WW app, but many others online)
• nonfat Greek yogurt with blueberry or strawberry compote (cooked in micro with some artificial sweetener)
• blueberry yogurt pie - this is my FAVORITE (due to my sweet tooth). I have it every night. Here is the recipe:

Thank you, this all looks awesome!

And here is a great turkey bolognese. I eat it over zoodles or riced cauliflower. I use ground turkey (note that the original instructions were for chicken). This is 1 point per serving (based on 8 servings). It freezes well.

Peps-you take whatever time you need to figure it out. Well all have to do that and we'll be here when you're ready.

DD-good for you joining WW!

Liz-glad there is a reopening plan.

Shirl-you just amaze me. Your cooking, your personal responses. Wow.

Diane S.-glad you and co-owners will be able to reopen gallery. Sounds like you will be able to maintain some distance.

Weight unknown.

Was "on program" yesterday. walked over 10k steps. It felt like a very "normal" day and my mood was MUCH improved because of it. Girls got to re-start their swim lessons (which is in a personal home the next neighborhood over). Becca cries when she has to get out and Charlotte cries when she gets in! We did a quick change and headed over to the park playground to meet up with some church friends. I was slightly on the fence about playsets because obviously my kids are too young to recognize NOT to put hands in mouth or lick something, etc. But by the same token, sunlight is supposed to greatly reduce the half-life of the virus. And I think it's much better than indoor playgrounds and the like for kids. Sooo I decided I would bend for that one. After lunch and nap we watched Trolls and then dinner and when Rich got home we took the kids for a walk in the neighborhood over to the area where a real go-getter neighbor has decided to have food trucks regularly come! There was a snowcone one and a barbecue truck. There were so many little kids biking over there and then in this area of the green belt, a few families had brought blankets and were having a picnic in the lovely 80degree weather. It was something to behold! I never even knew our neighborhood had so many little kids!! That is definitely something I appreciate about the shutdown: seeing families get outside. We took our food back, put the girls to bed, and then Rich and I ate dinner on our new patio cushions! And closed out the evening watching It Happened ONe Night. I feel so good about my diet recently. It doesn't really feel like I'm telling myself no. I feel like I'm on my own side!! At chick fil a yesterday I got their wrap and ate half of it (other half today). And for dinner I got the special smoked chicken sandwich with fries. It was cheap enough, so I chucked the bun and fries, added a salad. I've been trying to eat 1200 calories daily. But I'm also trying to be mindful of my mental state toward my "diet." If I begin to feel too strict, I may have to ease up.

...My 10 year surgiversary is one week away. I'm trying to collect my thoughts about it personally. Maybe I will share some. Anyone have some words, musings, thoughts, questions to help me jump start my diarying? Sometimes it almost feels like another world, the overweight stage, the losing stage. I'm familiar with the regaining stage, unfortunately.

I always think about how brave we all were to take a step into the unknown, to choose something so PERMANENT, to embrace HOPE after so many failed attempts... What drove you to take a risk both physical and emotional?

I think you are doing so awesome! 10 years, 2 pregnancies, many, many life transitions, and here you are at a healthy weight. It's really quite amazing. You've kept a chronic disease at bay. You've added years to your life. Amazing!