Monday May 4, 2020

I almost ran over a baby alligator next to our little pond yesterday. And last night there was a big hawk on our roof with a squirrel in his claws!

I can't top those encounters, awesome. Although Friday there was squirrel love right in broad daylight in a tree outside my window. I would've yelled, get a room!, but I discourage them from entering buildings whenever possible.

Happy OMG! I don't have anywhere to go day #49! Yup. I walked out of my classroom 49 days ago and haven't worked with my class IRL since. I am glad to see them on Zoom during the week. I sat in my office hours today wishing for a kid to come on. I even scheduled a session with a parent and she didn't show up either. Booooooo! I added a writing project I love to do for open house with the kids - free form poetry about self appreciation. It's based upon a compilation of student poetry called, The Best Part of Me . (6 minute video of someone other than me reading the poems.) I created a Google slide for each kid with a title tile, a Poem tile, and a large tile for a picture of their favorite Part of Me. Hoping to create a slide show for them since we can't do a hallway photo gallery.

I completely spaced on my teleconference shrink appointment. I even hear the phone ring and let it go to voicemail. Sadly, an hour before I saw the reminder for the appointment pop up on my screen while doing school work. OOPS! Freudian???? Not sure....

Food is okay.... REally not bad at all. Normal is the best that I can put it. Not too many sweets (but probably still more than the average adult), weight is still bouncy bouncy betweeh 268-269.

I am also going to proudly admit that I have at last perfected a chocolate chip cookie recipe. Crispy around the edges and chewy gooey in the center - even cooled. My favorite type of cookie. Regulation is a challenge, of course, but so far so good. There is also another reason for perfecting the recipe. Now that I can make my "perfect" chocolate chip cookie the bar has been raised. I will no longer be satisfied with a cheap attempt at cookie heaven when I can now make it myself. BAM! That means (I'm hoping) that when I get the urge for a really good cookie I will go through the work of making it, which means I will delay gratification and that I will no longer be satisfied with a cookie that is less than. Maybe a weird way of making sure a cookie is worth it, but I am dealing with disordered eating here, sooo.....

Off to Whole Paycheck... I mean Whole Foods for some produce. I have no fresh fruit in the house and no fresh veggies.

I wonder what "normal" sweet intake looks like? I could never eat one chocolate chip cookie - it would be more like 6. But my SIL eats an apple when she wants something sweet. DH used to eat one cookie and didn't need more. And he could leave them in plain sight and not be tempted. I think something in between the two is "normal" but have NO IDEA what that looks like.

Yeah, I'm with you on that. I don't quite know either. I suppose it is slightly different for everyone, but I know a lot of naturally thin people who eat a single cookie or two, or a piece of chocolate and are satisfied. I'm working hard on learning to be that person.....

It is best for me just to avoid them altogether!