Thursday, 1/16/2020

Love you!

I have to echo that too: 64 going on 65 and weight is all that as well. And I am still always looking for my next meal. And when depressed/stressed am looking for sugary foods which only make me feel good while they are in my mouth...

She is a really good friend, but it still pissed me off. Why do weight loss compliments always seem to need to be attached to an insult? As if to acknowledge that particular success, one needs to call attention to what you've done to yourself that caused it all in the first place. Or do my own feelings about my weight perceive an insult that isn't really there like I'm projecting?

It kills me that you feel inadequate and undeserving. Because you are anything but those things, dear Devon! I also get exhausted by the notion that I am nearing 50 and still have my weight and appearance as my truest barometer of inner peace and happiness. I remember a decade ago embarking on yet another massive weight loss attempt saying I'd like to reach a point where my weight is not my #1 worry in life. I still haven't achieved that. I thought I had a year or so after surgery, but ha! Naive me didn't think I was going to struggle with regain. I had figured it out. But it's never figured out is it? Breaking those connections between stress and food, happiness and food, boredom and food is a never ending job. I think I've bested it and the damn thing grows back. It's like planting mint in the ground. Once it's in there, it's IN there. Every time you think you got it all, it pops up again 20 feet away. I suppose it's the most vigilant "gardeners" that keep that stuff in check. Looking for it at every turn, identifying it, treating it, digging it out when it rears its ugly head...

Now I'm just rambling. In sum, you're awesome, so I think it's high time for you to start challenging some of those inner voices with the TRUTH. That you're highly capable and wicked smart. That you're physically stronger than 99% of your peers. That you're so much more that you give yourself credit for, including more than just your eating habits.

A-******G-MEN! What you said to Devon! And each of us deserves to hear it, too.

And regarding your friend's comment ... see, I think she needs to evolve up--to check herself, see what her own issues are, get in therapy, deal with her competitiveness, feelings of insecurity, etc., that she deals with by being blunt and inconsiderate to you and surely everybody else in her life.

You COULD consider asking her why she phrased her comment that way. But chances are she'd just say, "I'm a plainspoken person--take it or leave it." Or some version of the response that would get me up in her grill: "Gee, you're so over-sensitive lately!" And of course then, if you chose, you could do the Cecily version of "outspoken" and respond with, "And sometimes you're just a c**t."

I think I need a time out.

I think Potty Mouth Ann is my very favorite Ann of all!!!

And I'm a little too fond of Potty Mouth Ann myself. ;)

I ADORE Potty Mouth Ann!

Thank you for your kind words! Fascinating how emotional baggage trumps truth isn't it? I will do my best to keep what you say in mind because you are right. XO!

Good Morning All from our Smokey Farm but thankful its still safe. I drove up here Wednesday evening after taking the puppies to the Vet for their vacinations. And what a drive it was ! Massive thunderstorms with lightening, 3 dogs and 6 chickens towing a big tipper trailer full of furniture - visability wasnt wonderful but I managed. It was a long 3.5 hours indeed..... Im a nervous tower after a dog trailer loosing a wheel at 100km an hour - thankfully the dogs were ok and also the ducks in the other side. I managed to bring the ute to a stop without ending up in a ditch or worse wrapped around a gum tree. Always a good outcome

Happy to be back here and enjoying the solitude. Think its exactly what I needed. I took myself into Albury (NSW) and Wodonga yesterday after work for a little shopping - and food supplies. Got a few more Birthday gifts in the sales. I now have Jan & Feb birthdays all wrapped and carded and well on the way for March and April. I had decided that with plans to bring my knee replacement forward that I needed to be very organised. Im on track. Just have to sort out a few health issues and see the surgeon next month.

Got 12 punnets of Blueberries - YUMMMMM so I have given some away and frozen some. I see some baking on my horizon.

The fires continue to rage and we are thankful that some of Wednesdays rain fell over parts of the area. Many are still out of control and will be for some time. Im touched to see so many Aussies banding together to support those who have lost everything and our Vet is down in one of the worst effected areas helping care for the wildlife. Its wonderful to see in a world that sometimes makes you question

Liz - You have been in my thoughts so much over the past week. You will be feeling completely drained but Im so pleased to read that the wake and service went well. A beautiful send off for a lovely man. May he RIP x Be kind to yourself in the coming days and weeks as you adjust x

Ann - Your travel plans look amazing :) I smiled reading them. Italy is one of my favourite places - Im yet to see Tuscany so will experience it through your photos. Go girl x

Peps - Wanted to send you a big Aussie Hug and know you are very dear to us x

Cec - Well done - you are doing so well. Sometimes those closest to us think its their "right" to comment. Oh the amount of comments that my Dad made about my weight - the list is endless...

Paula - Good to see you coming back more regularily. Sounds like the plans for your party are coming along well. Re his Kids - blending a family is often a challenge I found. It does settle once you have some water under the bridge and boundaries established. Always ensure you are respected - no matter what

Diane O - Hello and great to hear DH is healing well with minimal pain now. Hope you are getting some you time to recharge before the next one is done

Diane S - Hello and hope you are enjoying being back at the gallery. How is the pool going ?

BB - Have loved seeing the pics of your gorgeous girls :)

Miss150, Leap, DD - Hello and you are missed x

Well I had best go get some work done. 2 cups of tea done, chickens let out of their coop and wandering happily around in their electrified yard (cop that Mr Fox !) Puppies have big bellies from their bones and are lazing soaking up the sun. Cows have also decided after feeding in the front paddock that they will wander down to their tree down the back and have a rest. I might so some baking after work and there is always watering. DH arrives on the train around 10pm tonight. We are installing a 12 station watering system tommorrow - that should negate the need for my SIL to come over and water the pots etc - so busy one tommorrow.

Have a wonderful afternoon/evening

Much love to you all

Welcome home and to a little bit of solitude before everyone else arrives.

And for others who also didn't know what a "punnet" is, here's the definition and a picture:

https://www.google.com/search?q=punnet&oq=punnet&aqs=chrome. .69i57j69i59l2j69i60l3j69i65j69i61.1068j0j7&sourceid=chrome& ie=UTF-8

You're welcome. :)