09/18/19, Wednesday

1. Within Range: yes
2. General Wellbeing: 9.5 on SS
3. 10,000+ Steps: 7211
4. Fitness: walking
5. Self-Care: tried, but see below
6. Fun: picking up truck
7. I learned/relearned: Things happen for a reason... going with the flow pays off.

Long story shorter, someone named Diane called and cancelled their hair cut and color NEXT Tuesday. The dizzy receptionist took MY cut/color out of the book for yesterday, so when I arrived, someone else was getting a cut and color. I said I'd take the appointment for next Tuesday that was supposed to have been cancelled and the salon felt so bad, they comped me a massage and pedicure before my appointment ! Score !

Looking forward to FINALLY getting to mow today !!

Weight: 142.2
Protein: 97
Carbs: 83
Veggies/Fruits: 6
Water: 8 ounces
Sleep: 8 hours
Exercise: Yoga class (75")

BonnieB, I know you're having so many feelings right now. I'm thinking of you.

DianeO, a complimentary massage and pedicure is a VERY good day.

Shirl, I'm loving how much y'all are loving your West Coast holiday. Still doin' it right.

This morning my weight was up again, which was a real surprise. Nonetheless, onward. :)

Loved my sleep last night. I think my little sleep hygiene tweaks are helping. One thing I'm doing that's a bit new is NOT fighting sleep so much, like turning out the light after the first doze-off. I know, duh, right?

Don't have a lot of brilliance or excitement to share this morning--with luck, today will be just regular life, which can be a beautiful thing, i.e., chores, reading, writing, mowing, washing dishes, reading the mail, watering flowers, etc. There were entire years of my life when I fantasized about a life this simple, and here it is.

Today's musical stylings are by the Eagles ... "Take It Easy" :)

Diane O.-wow that is customer service! And as we can see from our small group, there are a lot of Diane's!!

Ann-thank you.

167.8 today. Swelling etc. going down. Between the implant weight and the fat weight, this might be my new weight.

Not that I care so much about the insignificant physical right now (I think Diane S. recently made a comment about not being a bad life even when fat and that really resonated with me. I think the longer I live thin the more I realize sure some things are nice but it didn't change the most important things) but suddenly having weird feels about my explant no doubt brought on by death. Feeling "empty". Physically. Emotionally.

This death has so far been an entirely different experience from granddaddy's. I'm sad. I miss her. I don't know what to do with myself. But it's hard to wi**** another way. I do, but then I realize how selfish that is. How wonderful for her. If only it could be that way for us all!

I'm trying to think about what I can control now. Like trying to help create the relationship between my kids and my parents that I had with my grandparents. And trying to be a better person. Trying to emulate the kind of love that my grandmother had for us!

I'm not really eating that much. Not much news there. Though I cannot say I'd care too much even if I were. With granddaddy I had just had WLS and food was still very much a way of coping for me. To not be able to eat (just liquid!) was so difficult.

I guess I'm growing up. We have limited time and we must make the best of it. Ready set go!

Nice that your salon made an effort to keep you happy!

Last night I was the no sleep person. I slept about 2 hours, woke up and couldn't fall back asleep for another 4.5 hours during which time I would read, then try to sleep multiple times. I finally got another couple of hours. Of course the last was deep sleep so getting out of bed on a cool morning and dealing with DH's shower was tough. Luckily there isn't anything too onerous on the agenda and it was all preplanned so I should do okay. Our mid-day event includes a light lunch and our late afternoon one includes a light dinner, so no cooking required today!

The Memory Care facility told me yesterday that DH had to see the doctor prior to admittance because his last physical was in May and it has to be within 90 days. So here we are less than two weeks from admission and I have to get him into the doctor. Don't know why they didn't tell me earlier. They had supposedly already contacted the doctor's office and been assured that DH could see a nurse practitioner for an update and they would get him in on time. When I called, the guy was trying to book out by a few weeks or send us an hour away to another office. He did agree to ask around and call me back. Thank goodness, because they called back and gave us an 8 am appointment tomorrow at our local office. Whew!

I am feeling very fat and very stressed. I don't like it - it makes me feel out of control. I need to get control over life.

Have a willing Wednesday.

Weight up and down over the past few days but seems to center around 260. I have not been tracking my food. I am not eating as much as before surgery. I am very careful about salt intake because it feels like it goes to my knee. Ice is my friend. Trying to duplicate my PT at home. I think DW is going to take pictures of the next PT so we can do them in the same order at home.

DianeO, What a beautiful truck. I love the color. I really like driving mine. And great salon that will make it right with their error.

Liz, Guilt is a funny thing. You do not have any control over what disease processes anyone will have. I feel guilty being taken care of just with knee replacement. And I feel I am an extra burden. I bet if your DH was able to tell you he would describe his guilt too. I would not want her spending the last of her lifetime caring for me in a state absence of everything I was.

Ann, I love simple. Never thought about it until I started following Leo years ago. And also the tiny house movement. I just can not simplify my shop. Always need another tool.

BB, hugs

Shirl, hope you are still having a great time on vacation.

Devon, when we were doing foster care getting 13 ready for the school year it was usually a stressful first 6 weeks of routine change. Hang in there. Your students are blessed to have you as their teacher.

DianeS, a few days ago you wrote Is weight really the be all end all to a good life? I do not think it is. I do not think I would have been able to come to that conclusion unless I would have taken the WLS journey. And all of the self analysis that went along with it.

Ceci, Did you get the screen door fixed? I can think of all kinds of projects to do while I can't do them.

more later, david

Waiting on primer to dry so I can sand and put on the bright red paint!

Good Morning All x

Sitting on the boat ready to head to Alcatraz. Drizzling rain this morning- first lot of cooler weather but not worried

Looking forward to seeing San Fran today. Napa tomm

Diane O- Score :) lovely to be pampered

Liz- just the hugest hug coming your way x

BB- same to you as you go through the many emotions of your lossx

David- keep healing x Thinking of you

Ann- sounds like a lovely day x

more later

S

Not much here. Up yet another pound, which really makes no sense to me. I was a careful eater yesterday and calories were in range. I'm going to blame a heaving lifting work out last night and a late dinner due to taking Ella in for a blood draw at 8:30 pm and not eating dinner until 9:30.

Came to school in a good mood. Had to lower the boom during the spelling lesson. Sigh... Amazing how little self control this group possesses.

I am curious about this concept of sleep hygiene. I learned long ago that, if one has sleeping issues of any sort, that the bedroom and bed should be reserved for sleep and sex only. No reading or watching tv or talking on the phone or use of electronics while in bed. I refuse to have a TV in the bedroom. I never read in bed and never bring my laptop, phone, or iPad to bed (except while traveling to use for my alarm). I was a chronic insomniac for years during my teens and early 20s. Since adopting the above practices, I have learned to fall asleep usually within 15 minutes of going to bed. I do wake up during the night, but I do not turn lights on or read. If I do, I get up out of bed, go to the living room and do those things. My bed is for sleep (and you know...) only. Just throwing that out there for consideration.

Shirl and I solidified our plans for Sunday evening. We are going to eat at the Dead Fish, the place I recommended to her when she arrived in the Bay Area. I'm looking forward to it. Haven't been there in a long time AND I get to meet another one of our Tribe, live and in person.

In the words of Porky Pig, "That's all folks!"

I can't fall asleep unless I read until falling asleep (kindle paperweight with low light). This is a lifelong bedtime habit for me (used to use a booklight on a traditional book). But I have no lights on otherwise, a cool room, and no TV in the room.

Really looking forward to meeting you Peps x