VSG Maintenance Group
Sat, June 1st
The procedure went as planned, DH came to pick me up at 8pm, and then I went home.
I know some of you have gone thru this twice. Things I want desperately want to be different this time:
1) Not be known as a cancer person. I hate that. Not even "person with cancer" is a big enough difference. I don't want that to define me at all.
2) Call DH out on some of his nonsense. For example, I did not expect him to hang with me at the hospital yesterday. He is already short on sick/vacation days and I didn't want him to lose one needlessly.
But, he did agree to pick me up at 8 pm. He arrives looking like he is wearing a shirt of hornets. Eventually, he yelled at the nurse that we pushed "the button button for 15 minutes and she failed to come."
The nurse apologized profusely, I said out loud there was no need. In the car, I asked how he is handling this and he said that it is somewhat easier the second time. He said that traffic was bad and that made him mad and that he doesn't like to be ignored.
I pointed out his demeanor made me feel like crap "I was mad" isn't worthy of a 56 year man. In contrast, I felt so grateful to all the people that worked to provide so much care in 1.5 days.
I added "Wow, you must be feeling really stressed and you might need additional help." He didn't deny that appeared to brighten up.
3) Heck, I don't remember what #3 is. I think I'll go back to bed.
Job #1 to all of you, do something pleasurable today,
Shel
HW:361 SW:304 (VSG 12/04/2014)Mo 1:-32 Mo 2:-13.5 Mo 3: -13.5 Mo 4 -9.5 Mo 5: -15 Mo 6: -15 Mo 7: -13.5 Mo 8: -17 Mo 9: -13 Mo 10: -12.5 11/3/2015 Healthy BMI Reached! Mo 11: -9 Mo 12: -8 12/27/2015 Goal Weight Reached!
She'll, your posts come from a place of clarity and grace. I do not begin to know your DD, but I know your matter of fact calm helps me. You asked, so my two cents is that DD needs to be a fully informed member of your support team. If you withhold or buffer information and facts she may obsess on all of the other things she imagines she isn't being told. Family access to counseling is a great idea. DH may utilize it as part of a team. I like that you are thinking about what YOU need to navigate all of this on your own terms. Social work or counseling to keep your team on point and aligned with your plan is a solid plan. Love you and will continue sending all of the positive thoughts and healing Reiki you intend to receive.
Age: 64; 5' 5"; High weight: 345; Start weight: 271 (01/05/15); Surgery weight: 218 (05/27/15); Pre-Op (-53); M 1 (-18); M 2 (-1.5); M 3 (-13.5 ); M 4 (-13); M 5 (- 8); M 6 (-12) M 7 (-5, Xmas); M 8 (- 9) Under surgeon's goal and REACHED HEALTHY BMI 12/07/15!! (Six months and one week.) AT GOAL month 8. Maintaining at goal range (139- 144) ~ four (4) years !!
on 6/1/19 5:24 am
"If you withhold or buffer information and facts she may obsess on all of the other things she imagines she isn't being told."
This is the truth. I had a bit of a freak out when my Dad was holding back information from me. I get that he was trying to protect me as his kid and likely taking time to process the information himself, but facts and the truth are much easier to deal with than wondering (and catastrophizing) what you're not hearing.
Thank you all for your thoughts!
I wouldn't be able to keep this from DD if I tried so she might as well have real information. Which, honestly, isn't that bad. As my onc mentioned, I have been very high functioning with that thing in my lung for a long time. My SOB is from the pulmonary embolism, not The Thing. It is really a positive incidental finding that it was discovered so I can get appropriate treatment.
See what a little coffee clarity and good boards vibes does for one's outlook?
HW:361 SW:304 (VSG 12/04/2014)Mo 1:-32 Mo 2:-13.5 Mo 3: -13.5 Mo 4 -9.5 Mo 5: -15 Mo 6: -15 Mo 7: -13.5 Mo 8: -17 Mo 9: -13 Mo 10: -12.5 11/3/2015 Healthy BMI Reached! Mo 11: -9 Mo 12: -8 12/27/2015 Goal Weight Reached!
Weight: 137.6
Macros: Calories - 1,486, Carbs - 132, Fat - 32, Protein - 156, Fiber - 29
Sleep hours: 8 hours
Veggie/Fruit Servings: 9
Water glasses: 0
Exercise: 5,000 steps
Shel, I'm glad you weren't in the hospital another night. And given that you posted at 1:45 a.m. Seattle time it's clear you finally got some coffee!
And I won't use that word.
BTW, I hope you know I'm going to the U. Iowa summer writers workshop because you made me take another look at "why I couldn't go there this year." Thank you for that!
And now I'm going to post my usual obsessive **** Because it calms me down.
So yesterday I ate 250 extra calories, and the scales dropped. Naturally, right?! And today is June 1, two months after returning from NOLA. I've now lost 13 of my 15 Mardi Gras pounds. It's actually not bad. :)
Yesterday's local festival was lovely. I stayed only a couple of hours, went to an old-time cooking gadget lecture, listened to some funky bluegrass, saw a lot of friends, walked straight through a fly-casting competition where I got yelled at and almost hooked, then came home and listened to another 2018 U.Iowa writing podcast.
Today I'm driving to the Big City to spend the night with friends. In the summertime they watch movies on the top of their loft building, and tonight is the first rooftop movie of the season: "Green Door," which I haven't seen.
Tomorrow I'll drive home in time to pay the guy who's pressure-washing all my porches, decks, patios and windows. What a relief it will be to have that chore finally done.
Today's theme (thanks to Shel and everyone could have predicted this musical selection): Do something pleasurable!
ANN 5'5", AGE 74, HW 235.6 (BMI 39.2), SW 216, GW 150, CW 132, BMI 22
POUNDS LOST: Pre-op -20, M1 -10, M2 -11, M3 -10, M4 -10, M5 -7, M6 -5, M7 -6, M8 -4, M9 -4,
NEXT 10 MOS. -12, TOTAL -100 LBS.
