VSG Maintenance Group
Wednesday, February 27, 2019
on 2/27/19 4:59 pm, edited 2/27/19 9:02 am
I wondered if other people considered wet hair water weight! I also wondered if my skin absorbed any of it. Post shower weighing is tainted weighing in my warped mind!
PS- lots of individual things that on their own I can handle, feel extra overwhelming when they all hit at once. I would have been stressed at all that too!
On the discussion about the origins of obesity... My surgeon said obesity is a disease caused by multiple factors. So in his opinion, obesity stems from not one specific cause, (which would make it easier to prevent), but multiple factors, the words he used were multi-faceted origins. He was convinced that WLS is the only effective treatment we currently have for obesity. (Different than excess weight, but he said research shows once you are 50 or more pounds overweight, the success rate of weight loss through dieting was 1% ! Worse than the general populations 5-7%).
In my study of one (me) I know obesity is a chronic disease. I expended tremendous physical and emotional effort many times throughout my life to lose weight, but could never maintain those losses for more than 2 years. Enter WLS, and almost 7 years later, even with some regain, I am over a 100 less than I was. I am no smarter, no stronger, no better of a person, than I was before.
WLS is a treatment, not a cure, for a chronic disease. Sometimes I am pissed that I have this disease, and I have to work so hard sometimes to keep it in remission. But still, I am also really grateful a treatment existed. I hope in the years to come, there are even better treatments for this chronic disease, but for now, I really love my sleeve.
I really like that.
At the end of the day I've begun to come to terms with "it is what it is." I just wish that our culture didn't villainize the victims of this disease more than they do any other. I think part of the reason I'm so hung up on the "why" is because of culture is still so obsessed with the notion that it's a character flaw to be overweight. Almost 9 years in and I've still never fully outted myself to having WLS--just because I don't want to have to defend it. But that's pretty absurd. When people say something about WLS being the "easy way out" I always respond that it was my "only way out." I have quoted them weightloss stats as well. You don't get much of an award for doing it the "healthy" way. And sadly, had I not had WLS I think I would be higher than the weight I started at. That's not to say it's a total cure (we're all proof, aren't we?) or that surgery itself is enough. I still think it was/is my best hope. Sometimes I think my sleeve i8s stretched out and I'm sad. Then I eat Mexican food with a friend and remember--I do still have limits. And I'm so thankful!
But being this far out and especially going through life changes (pregnancy, for example), I know that the sleeve alone cannot do all the heavy lifting.
Letting go of the shame of obesity is a huge journey. I wrote a note to my fat self on the eve of my surgery to thank "her" for bearing my children, to remember that there had been beauty and ecstasy in that life too, and to honor her courage in trying to live her best life in a world that denigrated her existence. And even with all the self love I've tried to show myself, I don't like it when my pre surgery pictures pop up in Facebook memories.
I don't talk about my surgery with normal weight people. I'm not ashamed, it's too exhausting to educate them, I don't want to expend the energy. If someone who could benefit from the surgery asks, I will definitely discuss it. I would never want to leave an obese person thinking I somehow was "better" than them. 7 years later, I don't get too many questions, because I think people have forgotten I used to be morbidly obese.
Oh my.... talk about striking a chord!
almost 7 years later, even with some regain, I am over a 100 less than I was. I am no smarter, no stronger, no better of a person, than I was before
at 7 years out I weighed 3 pounds less than my initial consult weight and 13 pounds MORE than my surgery weight. Yet, I DO feel stronger and smarter after all the weight that has been lost and found and lost and found again. WLS for me was a fantastic tool for losing the weight, but my head was not ready to understand my illness and the function that my emotional life played in my obesity.
For quite sometime I was quite envious of people like you who found their paths to maintain weight loss after WLS. Not so much these days. I'm grateful for the strength I have gained in the last 7 years - physically and emotionally. One benefit to the physical strength is that I have a very different body at this weight than I did prior to WLS. My waist is 4 inches smaller and I'll be damned if I can't still wear slim fit jeans! LOL!
The head part of the game, a whole nother journey. I think I took that journey before surgery, well, as much as I could. Probably for me, the reason I was able to take the surgery step. And hopefully I am still growing with each year I live, but truly, on the idea that some have that obesity is a moral failing, I am no more "moral" than I was before, and I have no moral superiority over anyone who still struggles with obesity. What I do have, is a pretty talented surgeon. :)
On the issue of maintenance and regain, I am sometimes scared $&!#less that I will end up morbidly obese again in 10 years. Despite fighting it, I've regained 30 pounds over the last 4 years. It's sobering. So I am a far from perfect WLS success story, but I'm still standing. And fitting into whatever damn chair I want to sit in. May it ever be so.
Oh, poop! I hope I didn't come across as upset or defensive. Just in case I did, my sincere apologies. I just wanted to say that for all I've been through - the regain and subsequent self doubt, shame, self recrimination and loathing - I actually believe myself to be in a much better place than I was even a year ago.
