Friday, January 4, 2019

Weight 123, calories 1199, outside temperature 33 degrees. It will be 80 degrees when we land in Fort Myers this afternoon.

I feel like I'm mostly ready. Justice is edgy because of the preparations yesterday and of course his travel bag is out.

DH was super nasty last night to me (not anyone else). I sure hope he isn't today. I don't feel comfortable giving him a drug to calm down since he has never taken it previously so I am little nervous about the day,

BIL who helped take care of MIL when she had dementia and took the caretaker class with me did NOT help. Though he did take DH to the gym for a bit yesterday, he parked him in front of the TV the rest of the day yesterday watching old TV shows that BIL likes. When I changed the channel once because DH wasn'****ching, BIL got upset - he was busy vacuuming his car with my vacuum and my electricity. I could have parked DH there myself - I didn't need BIL to supposedly "help". Then at dinner when DH started on a tirade about not seeing someone (he has seen them somewhat recently), I tried to defuse by saying that we would see if we could get together but BIL kept bringing it up trying to remember when DH saw him last. Which kept DH continuing to be upset. I told BIL afterwards to drop things when he gets like that. It doesn't help to prolong it. He proceeded to tell me that I needed to stop checking on DH after I had gone upstairs in the afternoon when DH was missing. I knew he was gone long enough to be doing something he didn't need to be and sure enough he was trying to change into the clothes for today. Not a big deal on another day, but it would greatly complicate things if I had to figure out other clothes or even find things (they get squirreled away when he is alone). Now I'm wondering if BIL fueled DH's mood to get him mad at me when they were at the gym. Potentially DH was complaining about me and BIL was feeding it like he was about the individual DH wanted to see. Maybe he thinks going along with the conversation even when it is anger producing is appropriate rather than defusing it???

Okay, enough of my Tirade! BIL is here to drive us to the airport. We leave in an hour. I need to check my list!

Talk to you from sunny Florida next!

1. Within Range: yes
2. General Wellbeing: 9 on SS
3. 10,000+ Steps: 7328
4. Fitness: Simply Fit board to LOUD music; dog(s) walking
5. Self-Care: increase water intake
6. Play/Leisure: reading, knitting
7. Intentions: Manifest daily fitness goals. Increase water and decrease wine.

Can't wait to hear how Devon is making out ! Ann, your neighborhood sounds fabulous !! Our RV is scheduled to be de-winterized March 25^th. This cold, damp, cloudy weather is sucking the zest out of life. I'm looking at Florida, the Caribbean or some other warm, sunny destination for a couple of weeks in mid-March. Any ideas ? Anyone up for meeting somewhere ? Liz, hope Paul travels easily back south. Justice should help. How would it work if you told him that when he is irritated and short with you, it upsets Justice, reinforcing how much Justice wants to be with him when he is calm and positive ?

That's a good idea! He definitely likes to make sure Justice is happy.

So duh! I just realized that Justice really is an emotional support dog and should be used that way! DH is cuddling him as we wait to board.

Weight: 134.6
Macros: Calories - 1,581, Carbs - 151, Fats - 66, Protein - 115, Fiber - 26
Sleep hours: 8
Vegetable/Fruit Servings: 6
Water glasses: 2
Exercise: 17,500 steps
Meditation: Yes

What a good day yesterday was! I walked my patootie off, registered for French language classes, bought my books, found and joined a neighborhood 'all you can eat' yoga studio (only $33 the first month), and made a Walmart run to buy grocery and household staples.

Last night I had dinner with my friend and her husband. She's a great cook and made delicious fish tacos. Happily, they're both vegetable freaks, so lots of those were on the menu, too.

It's stopped raining here, and the next few days of weather will be sunny and crisp (mid 50s). Today I'll walk in the park and elsewhere, go to yoga class, run some errands, e.g., have extra keys made. But the main thing on my to-do list is to begin a daily writing practice.

And in other good news, old folks (like me) can ride the St. Charles streetcar for only 40 cents.

Heading soon for the park.

Today's theme: Be here now.

;)

Good morning!

I'm thinking "be here, now" means get your azz on the first flight to NOLA, right?

Congratulations to Peps and Ace!

I googled fire trailer and immediately an Australian website popped up with said trailers for sale. I haven't googled snake wire, yet.

I'm supposed to be trudging around with a weight vest but I overslept. Sleep is a priority, too, so that's ok.

Liz, I don't like that DH seems to be more nasty more often. I am sort of hoping that dear BIL stoked the flames and it wasn't just DH. BIL doesn't seem to have your same caregiving smarts. What a great idea from DianeO!

Cecily, good job on your get up and go! DianeS, sounds like you have a good PCP, not always easy to find a good match.

Got to run! Shel

Good so far - Justice is doing his emotional support job!

I did tell BIL this morning that he needs to stop criticizing me and let me defuse situations. He was helping DH panic over a missing belt by taking him upstairs to search instead of asking. I had it in the bag to give to DH after security.

Here's the deal: In high-stress situations, ONE (well trained, knowledgeable) person with leadership skilz is in charge. Not two. NOt three. ONE. I know this because I've been taught it. And I've also learned it from experience. Doesn't mean others aren't part of the team. And doesn't mean that good communication among team members isn't important and valuable. But in high-stress situations, all team members are not co-captains.

Shel ... LOL! "Be here now" means be present, mindful, appreciate every moment.

But in this case, yes, it also means "Come on down!" :)

Liz-so sorry about your stressful day! Hope Paul's travel goes off without a hitch today. And Justice, too.

Diane O-sounds like you are feeling better! I am trying to embrace winter (I must admit, it was lovely driving into work today like something out of Dr. Zhivago, with the ice-covered trees and snowy yards!) but we don't get much of it here! Plus that's my New Year's resolution. However, I too am already dreaming about warmer weather! I would love to go some place like the Caribbean, but not sure that's in the cards for me this year. And that's ok.

Ann-Sounds like the South is doing you good! I love the Azaleas, etc. My aunt is from Shreveport. Actually, she reminds me a lot of you! She is very much a doer and go-getter. She just had a "burn the bad stuff" party, a New Year's tradition she's had for years. Also, love your theme of the day. Present/ "Be" is my word for 2019 (again?). I'm trying to find the beauty in whatever it is now. Admittedly, I'm quite the novice at this mindset.

Shel-Do you have a blog following your training? I'm so in awe of you! Mt. Rainier! Just uttering that name makes me shudder!!

Shirl-You so impress me with your endless entertaining.

Diane S.-Burn the bad stuff!! Or just throw it out! I need to follow my own advice. I don't know why I feel bad about throwing out food, especially if it was a gift. But I know I don't need it. Not really.

Yesterday we had some beautiful fluffy snow, and today it is all melting. That makes me sad. But on the bright side, it makes for much easier travel. Being pregnant and holding a baby carrier plus my extremely cautious nature makes ice a real nightmare for me. Today I need to really get crackin on some work. Anyone else still stuck in that holiday in-between glut? I feel like come Monday we'll all be back and ready. But still a weird week here, especially with the weather! Tonight we will meet friends out for Mexican food. Not the healthiest selection, but considering there will be 3 kids, I feel like it's the safest option for not disrupting others!

I am so sorry for those of you, especially you, Liz, having to deal with the aging process and memory loss. I only see a small part of it. We did have an issue with my grandmother over Christmas. I have mentioned before that I don't know to what extent it's her own personality quirks just amplified, aging, dementia, quirks of living alone, potentially Alzheimer's (though doubtful since it doesn't seem to get worse?) but I don't think the source really matters so much. Anyway, my aunt was staying with her mom (grandmother) over the break. My aunt has had a very rough few years. It was Christmas 4 years ago that she found out on Christmas day that her husband of over 30 years had been cheating. Then this year, just as she was about to celebrate her 2 year anniversary with her boyfriend and take him to Hawaii to celebrate, she found him dead in the shower. She really needed us this Christmas and we really tried to show her love and affection. Her job was fur-lowed due to the govt shutdown, so she wanted to stay longer, and my grandmother went ape s*. She went on an on about how her housekeepers were coming and she didn't want to reschedule and really coudln't have my aunt around. Yes, my aunt was being a little overly sensitive. But don't we all sometimes? She really needed to feel needed, and my grandmother essentially told her the housekeeper was more important. And my aunt cried. Then there was the question of: do we even mention it to grandma? I do quite a bit with my grandmother, maybe more than anyone else. I normally have breakfast with her every morning. I had decided to either not say anything or to let my dad handle it. But the perfect opportunity presented itself when I was in the car with my grandmother. She said "I sure am sad to see her go but I guess she was ready to leave." I calmly told grandmother that, no, aunt D was not ready to leave but she felt like you wanted her gone. This was a tough year for her and she really wanted her mama and I think you hurt her feelings." My grandmother paused, kind of looked down, and said "yes. I suppose I did." I don't know whether I did the right thing. It's so hard knowing when to try to communicate with those aging/memory deteriorating and when not to. It's as much about me having to learn about it as it is them. At least I felt better about saying something and I don't think I did it in a mean way. But who knows. I guess we're all just human here. And I know grandmommy didn't really mean what she said. She's become very defensive of her routine, especially at this age. I think it's the one thing she could control. But I also know how it feels to be on my aunt's side of things. She misses her mother, the one who is no longer there.