Sunday, December 23, 2019

Weight: 133.2
Macros: Cals - 1,375, Carbs - 102, Fats - 48, Protein - 96, Fiber - 25
Sleep hours: 6
Vegetable/Fruit Servings: 6
Water glasses: 4
Exercise: 7,000 steps and 20? of yoga@home
Meditation: Yes

My weight's steady, but I also I weighed at 2am (woke up much too early), so weight's probably still dropping.

Yesterday I got a lot done. But there's so much to be done this time of year.

Without children or grandchildren I don't feel the same kind of excitement around the holidays that other women appear to feel. Like someone else famously said :), "I could have stayed home and baked cookies," but like her I never wanted that and don't miss it. Still, the difference makes me feel out of step this time of year, and this Christmas I feel like an observer even more than usual.

Frankly, I'll be glad when Christmas is over. I'm ready for regular life to start up again.

And on a more festive note, I hope everyone was able to see last night's winter solstice full moon. It was glorious here! Still is, actually. :)

Today's theme: Happy New Year!

Last weight was 169.2

We have a sick baby in the house :( She has such a bad cough that she's finding it hard to eat. And it's just so sad :(

Kids and babies do add a special element to Christmas. Their reactions are just so genuine. Actually, not always happy, but definitely honest. Yesterday I took Becca to meet another friend's baby, and then the nieces (4 girls ages 3-9) arrived. It's also fun to buy their gifts because for not very much money you can buy that perfect gift (if only for a day!). Although I have to admit the last two Christmases, which we deemed "childfree Christmas" since my nieces were absent, were some of my fondest! We were able to leisurely attend church, enjoy a more adult-tastes dinner on fine china. We didn't even have presents Christmas Eve--just conversation and wine!!

Ann's quote from a certain first lady definitely brings up a response in me but I'm still confused about that response. Because I think I do want to bake more cookies and I feel confused and guilty about that. I enjoy working my brain, conversing with business people and legal minds. I also like the response I usually get when I answer someone that I'm an attorney. I even enjoy dressing in suits to work. I feel important. I so wi**** was a more clear-cut choice. And maybe for some it is. In my circle, most moms seem to stay home. They seem to feel sorry for me that I'm working!! I worry what my daughters will miss (and I will miss) if I'm not home with them (the kids with PTA moms had a DISTINCT advantage when I was in school) and I worry what example I'll be leaving if I don't work.

Not many presents remain to be wrapped! We also purchased a used Christmas village and set it up and it's PERFECT!! Today will be church, pedicure date with DSD, remaining presents, hopefully grocery store and maybe some more time with nieces depending on how Becca feels.

I think you have the right stuff to make it work whether full-time/part time or working mom.

As DD graduates from Highschool this year, one thing that I won't miss is the freakish divide between the working and non-working moms. It played out in a million ways. Since I volunteered at the school on Wed mornings for years, a lot of the other moms assumed I was one of them....a non-working mom.

I still have their shocked looks etched in my memory when they realized that those few hours on Wed was the only time I wasn't working. I could literally see a wall go up and invitations walked back. One woman actually said "oh, well, then it will never work for your daughter to be on our soccer team. We are a close knit group" There had been NO DISCUSSION of my over-scheduled daughter being on a soccer team. And I am the LAST PERSON who wants to join a "close knit" group. (My friendliness is a sincere varnish.) Just bizarre.

I have no doubt that the "close knit group" looked out for each other and their kids in a variety of ways, just as you note. I don't see, tho, now that they are close to graduating, that their kids were necessarily more successful from my admittedly limited viewpoint.

I am not saying that there isn't a way to cross the divide and have wonderful relationships with both groups. At the end of the day, I don't have the right personality. Also, I lacked the capacity to work long hours at work plus do all the PTA stuff. (Lots of the PTA stuff was early-late evening).

Another thing I won't miss is the judgement passed on foods/drinks brought for the kids' snack tables. Jeez Louise. There is no winning unless you bring natural spring water in large containers with reusable cups on the side.

That was a big 'ol rant. Sorry about that.

Also, about day-care costs. LOL. Been there, done that. It makes looking at paying for DD's college (likely at a state school) seem reasonable.

Oh Em Gee! The mommy wars!

Over the years, most of my women friends and acquaintances with children "worked outside the home." Don't you just love phrases like that? As if "the home" were the place were most women confine their work. Not to mention the fact that women who "work outside the home" also work their asses off in the home. As do many men.

Here are some interesting facts about US women in the work force, including this tidbit: 70% of mothers with children under 18 participate in the labor force, with over 75 percent employed full-time.

And some of those who work at home have exceptional burden ---children or family members *****quire full time care giving etc etc etc

As you once said, everyone is doing the best they can.

One more thing, that adopted Christmas village must be thrilled to find itself in your home!

I really hear myself in your thoughts about working/staying at home. If there is anyway you can work part-time, I think you'd get the best of both worlds. It definitely worked out for me. Is there any contracting work available for lawyers? I was in jobs which were IT related, so there was always contracting work at minimum but I obviously have no idea about legal work. I'm sure it would depend on what you specialize in.

Weight 123.2, calories 943.

Ears feel okay - I probably only need some ibuprofen at night at most today. My earlobes are a little fat, but hopefully they will subside before I need to get social again late tomorrow. My main issue is sleep deprivation from sleeping on my back and DH sitting bolt upright every once in a while at night... Speaking of which, DH got lost walking the dog last night. So no more walking after dark I guess. On a brighter note, I get to take a shower and wash my hair today (yeah!).

The house is decorated as much as it is going to be. Less than last year, but still fairly festive. I know what you mean about how much excitement children add to Christmas. I've really missed that for quite a while. But we are going to DS' birthmom's home tomorrow afternoon and there will be some excited grandchildren there!

I may venture out to the store this morning. I probably should go soon before the crowds...

Have a somewhat relaxing Sunday!

Wow, that was a lot of pain for an in-office procedure. I'm glad you gave yourself some time off to rest.

Liz, I just realized you said DH got lost last night. That must've been so scary for you both.

I'm glad you're recovering so fast from the scar repair surgery. Keep taking care of yourself. You need all the self care you can muster!

Hugs,

Ann