Thursday, July 26, 2018

Is your knee pillow like a pregnancy pillow? Ahh that was nice.

Yes sisters can be great. (they can also be the worst thing when you're dramatic teen and they "borrow" your clothes). I'm glad that Becca has siblings, but at 19.5 years apart, I'm sad that she won't have that same growing up relationship with her sister. Perhaps I can talk DH into another...

...perhaps I'd better give it awhile lol

Shel-your photos make me in awe of God's beautiful design. Perhaps I ought to try and get out and enjoy mother nature more.

Devon-you and me both re: what would food training look like? I am trying to train my baby, and similarly I bet you train your dogs because they need to learn certain skills to give them better health/life. Boy if that isn't the case for me! Trouble is, I can reach the snack jar. No one is telling me no. I know with my sleep training example that many friends have encouraged me to do it earlier before she forms certain associations and is very tough to break her of. Um yeah that's totally me. And I do have to be careful that what I do doesn't elicit a diet retaliation--like I wonder if the "pouch test" (to use an extreme example) could be called food training. Or cold turkey on x-y-z food (at least for a bit). And yet that stresses me out and makes me think "diet." So where is the healthy inbetween? Yeah, million dollar question right there.

Weight: 167. Finally broke my weight...the wrong way.

I actually feel less hungry today. Hallelujah!

Bought a silicone egg mold to make copycat "starbucks sous vide egg bites" in my instant pot. Pretty good fresh. Not quite Sbux but I'll save my $5! We'll see how they do reheated and even frozen.

Gearing up for our annual pool party...with a baby. A little fearful. I know I have to make some adjustments with a kid. At the same time I don't want to stop doing things.

Perhaps today my theme is *finding balance in all things*. Or something like it haha

Unfortunately by example, I did train my kids to turn to food for comfort and to relieve stress. All have suffered from weight issues. Right now DS is on the upswing. He was heavy as a teen but slimmed down at the beginning of college. Almost 10 years later he is working a lot and is lonely so I think that is why he is ganing. I had bought a key lime pie when our friends were here for dinner. 1/2 was eaten that night, but DS consumed the other half the next day. Reminds me of my old bad habits...

That's unfortunate.

If it makes you feel any better, my parents are pretty average-weight people. They don't eat healthy, but the don't eat unhealthily either. And both my younger sister and I grew up morbidly obese.

Again this is where I think about the distortion between "health" and "diet." Because now that I have a daughter, I need to be mindful of what I'm representing to her. Even though a diet might get me to a healthy weight, it may not be healthy and I might be acting out an unhealthy food relationship in an attempt to get to a healthy desirable weight (does this make sense?).

Ugh I guess I have to do it the right way.

I can already tell you that my biggest issue with food, and one that has a HIGH risk of being directed at Becca, is that food is a show of love to me. It is ingrained in me and I don't know that anyone or thing can ever break me of it (not even totally sure I want to be fully broken of it). My grandmother was a fabulous cook who loved with food and God help me I do too. I want to be that mom you walk into the kitchen and smell chili and know you're home, or whatever. How do I do that in a healthy way?

It's certainly a challenge: Food is love and celebration and a social activity. Somehow we and our children need to learn to enjoy it in moderation. We didn't learn that early enough but with your awareness hopefully Becca can. Regardless I know you will teach her to love and value herself which is the most important!

I was always so impressed that my grandmother knew every grandchild's favorite cookie and had them in the house whenever we visited. I'm talking homemade. My cousin David loved chocolate chip cookies without walnuts. His brother loved the walnuts in the cookies. Whenever they visit my Granny, she had both for them. She also made us ALL Christmas pajamas every single year.

Loving with food CAN be reserved for special occasions. It is hard for those like you and me who have grown up in food is love families to not use food as an everyday display of love, but it can be managed.

I can tell you the one thing above all I remember is my dad being home with me in the afternoons when I was little. He planned his class schedule around our school schedule. I can still remember learning to ride my little two wheeler on a school day afternoon. Time filled with attention, affection, guidance and teaching is a wonderful gift of love. I remember those gifts more than the food ones!

Coming up on 8:00 pm.

Slept like a log for 5 hours last night, then in and out for the next hour. Just got up at that point and got ready for the day.

Today was basically this: 8:30-3:30 working on the shed with about an hour break for lunch. 4:00 - 5;30 Cairn grooming, ran to the chiropractor for an adjustment, stopped at Peet's for an Iced Coffee, home to rest for a few before Auntie Kathryn brought her two smooth coated Brussels Griffons for a trim for a show on Saturday. Time to think about dinner!

By tomorrow the grooming shed will be completely paneled and "roughed" in. I will only have finish work to do, which is fun (when it goes smoothly) after tomorrow. YAY! Of course, we did not tackle the lid yet. That may wait for winter or next summer. BFF's has two tongue in cheek solutions. 1. Drape a "tapestry" along the beams and call it done, or 2. paint the ceiling black and let it vanish. Neither are doable options, IMO. So, it's a project for another time. I'll get the baseboards, window and door trim, and quarter round for the un-square corner done during August. I have to decide if I want quarter round in each corner so the look is consistent. Probably should, but the other three corners came out so perfectly, it's a shame to hide the workmanship behind quarter round! LOL!!!!!

My best call was creating one wall with a wainscoting of head board topped by white peg board. LOVE IT! Great for grooming tool storage, hanging dryers, extension cords, etc... I am searching for some not too deep drawers... any suggestions welcome.

Not a lot of thought about food today. Mostly, just ate when needed OR when transitioning from one thing to another. Really need to think about this Food Training concept. I know I have some significant retraining to do. It's starting to percolate in my brain. I hope that I can start putting it together over the next few days.

That's something I've noticed lately too is that when I'm busy I'm not hungry, but if I have a little time on my hands and I'm near the kitchen I'm suddenly starved. Hmm...

Traveled four hours back to DH's home VA, where we used to live Wednesday with all of his favorite doctors. Eye check yesterday and cardio and primary care today. DH has been seeing peripheral movement and shadows and his psych wanted to rule out eye issues before adjusting psych medications. Good call ! He has a hole in his right retina, and they said we weren't going home after appointments today, that we had to stay and be seen by the retina specialist tomorrow. We always pack way too many clothes for one night, so this time we made it a point to pack light in one bag. Running out and picking up an extra outfit for tomorrow was an easy in and out after WLS ! Back in the day, it would have been a major ordeal to try on long sought items until I found something to fit. This time, the thing that took the longest was finding a pillow for between my knees, as my one night fix wouldn't work another night ! (Loved your post, Cecily !) Most importantly, we could focus on making sure the dogs are covered, which they are.

Catching up with all of your posts ! Shel, I want to hike with you ! Cecily, I want to enjoy that channel view and some kayaking with you ! Ann, I want to mow your lawn, ride fences, and sit on your porch drinking wine as we discuss books. Peps, I want some puppy love, a bit of shop talk and to help with your grooming shed. Diane, I want to visit your gallery, meet your dogs, see your purple house and have some fudge. BB, I want to take care of Nugget a day when you are at work, go for groceries, and cook a fabulous meal you provide cedar planks and directions for. I want to sit and talk. I also want to meet your grandmother. ( I want to meet all DF, DH, etc but NO AUNTS !) Liz, I want to paddle around at the cape and have a great beach day, and have a walk with Justice ! Miss Bonnie, I want to see your beautiful home and get a quilting lesson as we chat. Dave, I want to help you love up babies and learn some nifty home improvement tip. Paula, I want to make your first weeks at work easier, share some in person Reiki, and just be there for you. Carbon, perhaps some in person Reiki I would help you sleep. Please forgive if I forgot anyone. Have to run.

DianeO -- what a sweet, sweet post. Best wishes today for DH who's got to be anxious about his eye issues. I would be!

But good on the V.A. diagnostic process that identified the issue.

And an Attagirl! for how you can now deal with finding clothes while on the road. Have a safe trip home.