Wednesday January 3, 2017

Wow. Yesterday s post stirred an overwhelming sense of loss in me. Liz, You have every right to be so angry. I am angry for you. And Paula and Ann. So not in any of the plans... to be robbed of companionship. Loss. Alzheimers is such a theft of a person s core makeup. And requires loved ones to take on a caregiver role that requires more than one person. I am sure on some level DHs are angry too. Cancer is such a theft of body health. Stripping strength a layer at a time or not. Maybe you hope for a remission. A new drug. I am amazed by your faith that everything will be what it is. And you don?t like it but it is what it is. You remain positive in your posts. I WANT SOME OF THAT remaining positive. Anger out is ok. Anger directed inward is depression. I have had to confront losses in my life but feel I have cheated my DW most of all because of anxiety / depression that kept me from working full time and just normal stuff that I no longer do over the past 12 years. I am better than I was. I try to be thankful for that.

We are supposed to have a heatwave. Today s high is 35o. Yesterday I built a metal tent over my drain plumbing on the Airstream. Put a gas heater and a fan. It thawed enough to drain the holding tank. Now we do not have to go to the shop bathroom in the night. We love our tiny space but we would make changes if we build tiny. First would be the door. I keep hitting my head on this short curved Airstream door. RVs are not really made to live in but we planned on doing this a couple of years. Next month will be a year More later, David

Dave, here's a great big hug from your fellow Ozarkian across the border. I hope you take the time to answer Diane S's "10 things" challenge below.

And on the living in the RV decision, there's always time to change our minds about things like that. A few years ago hubby and I thought we wanted to live in an urban loft. We rented one in The Big City and spent long weekends there for a year -- over a bar at one of the most happening corners in town. We did enjoy it. But realized at the end of the year that it wasn't where we wanted to be full-time. So we recommitted to our life in the country and have enjoyed it more back here since we came home full-time than we had for some time before the Great Loft Experiment.

And here's another big ole hug. ((((Dave))))

Thanks for the hug!

We kept the house so we can go back if need be. We both enjoy being remote and interaction with DS#1. We have more family members where we were living but see more of them now than we did when we were living there. Both locations have good points.

Here is a hug back ((((Ann))))

Greetings Fellow "Buts"

Still at 145 BUT at least there is no gain. Yesterday was a reasonably healthy eating day. Gallery duty limits food availability and the house is pretty free of it. DH is preparing to start Atkins but has not actually done it yet. Today he was eating the cranberry nut bread given to us that I had planned to toss.

Hey Shel, don't waste a perfectly good fire! Stay there and spend some quality time with dogs. You can ski later. My DH has become a piece of dog furniture - they are sitting on him now.

Hope your trip goes well Liz and that you get to stay longer in Florida - long enough to need a new hairdresser is a good thing.

Yep its good that everyone here feels comfortable enough to express feelings, fear, anger and joy. There is a safety in the cyber world. Diane O mentioned that this group gets many views. It made me think we are sort of a little reality show. "Former Fatties Chat" or something like that. Who knew our lives could be so interesting.

Dave I so love reading the "airstream chronicles" but not that you hit your head. It seems to be the season of anxiety and depression but you are a dear and compassionate person and I have no doubt you are cherished by your family. World class grand baby holder!

Here is an idea for everyone: make a list of ten good things about yourself and do not include the word "but" or any other qualifying description. No stopping at 5 or 6. Well, I am going to have to work on that later. Those of you with spouses with health issues should be able to come up with more than 10. Why does self criticism come so much more easily to some of us than self hugs? I used to wonder why I couldn't have one of those gigantic bullet proof egos that some people (ie lawyers and politicians) have?

Diane O, can't wait to hear about puppy class. Atlas is one lucky puppy.

Hoping the chemo and hydration does some good for those who's partners are experiencing it. Don't forget that you can help your partner by caring for yourself.

Well enough blathering. Time to get back to the real world of the clay studio. Peace and Joy. Diane S

Diane S., thank you for the invitation to focus on the fabulous person who is me. ;)

And since it's all about me, here are 10 ways I'm fabulous:

1. I'm smart.
2. I can be charming (when I want to be).
3. I am a good worker.
4. I have shockingly good health.
5. I have very good teeth.
6. I am a naturally optimistic, glass-half-full person.
7. I see beauty and feel joy easily.
8. I love to travel and see new places.
9. I'm a reasonable risk-taker.
10. I love studying and learning.

I so love this. I am still working on my list. DS

10 good things about me. This is very hard. I took it as a challenge.

1. Baby whisperer
2. Love to make things
3. Can teach one on one
4. Good listener
5. Content being at home
6. Push myself to go out of my comfort zone
7. Love to work
8. Nurse
9. I have not written lately but I write some poetry
10. Open to improving

good job my man. Guess I had better work on my list. DS

Here's my 10!

1. I'm a nice person
2. I have a good eye for decorating
3. My face skin is awesome
4. I have a good sense of humor
5. I'm empathetic
6. I'm smart
7. I'm a great cook
8. I'm a strong hiker
9. I'm a good listener
10. Dogs love me

I must play!

I am....

1. smart
2. witty
3. outspoken
4. resourceful
5. quick thinking
6. loyal
7. dedicated
8. caring
9. able to apologize and mean it
10. good with dogs

You know, this was not hard at all! I could actually keep going.... LOL! And not one damn thing has to do with appearance. Yay, me!